For The Pleasure Of Her Company
by evefaxton
Summary: Kiba never imagined what he'd have to go through for a date with Sakura. It was supposed to be a date, only one date! Kiba/Saku with a lot of crack couples. Some manga spoilers. M for mature situations.
1. Chapter 1

I do not own Naruto or make any profit from it.

Can you look 'Underneath the underneath'?

For The Pleasure of Her Company

Sakura's alarm clock went off at late in the afternoon. The insistent buzzing woke the nineteen year old from a dream filled with hearts and fluffy clouds. She tapped the button then sat up in a bed of satin sheets and ruffles. Stretching arms out and twisting left then right to clear the kinks in her spine, Sakura smiled from the memories of earlier in the day when lips pressed against her own and strong arms engulfed her in a tight embrace.

"Four o' clock... Only three hours to get ready," She hopped from her bed and rushed into the bathroom. Her good mood bubbled higher than the suds in her pink hair, so much so that she found herself wanting to sing in the shower. Instead of fighting the urge, she stepped out of the shower, grabbed a hair brush, and belted with the radio at the top of her lungs. The new crack in the mirror didn't bother her one bit. She could always buy a new one tomorrow.

Sakura continued to hum a happy little tune as she arranged the cosmetics on her bathroom counter. If her make up went on without any difficulty, then that was a good sign that her date will be fantastic. Foundation, blush, and eyeshadow were brushed on skin, making her glow like a princess. The black eyeliner glided perfectly across her lids on the first try. Then she picked up her new fake lashes and glued them in place without a hitch. After digging in her cosmetics drawer for fifteen minutes, Sakura found her go-to lipstick, a shade of seashell pink that highlighted the green in her eyes without making her pale skin look washed out. For twenty minutes she worked magic with a blow dryer and curler then clipped a little black bow in her hair. Several barrages of hairspray made sure not one pink strand was not going to move, even in hurricane force winds.

Satisfied with the hairdo, she knelt next to her bed and pulled out the long, big box that held tonight's special outfit. Sakura caught her breath as she revealed a beautiful halter dress of red silk chiffon laying within the paper tissues. Underneath the dress was a specially designed corset, matching lace garters, and sheer black stockings, all courtesy of the shop. After hitching the corset around her torso, she gleefully shook out each stocking and slowly stretched the delicate fabric over her legs. Then she made sure to use the clips in fastening the lace edges to her garters. Unable to resist testing the push-up corset, Sakura hopped around and was delighted to see her bigger cleavage jiggle in response.

When she got the giggling under control, Sakura turned back to the last piece of clothing, "Alright enough playing around It's time to don the dress!" Careful not to snag the fabric on her heels, Sakura stepped into the middle and wiggled the dress up her legs, over the hips, and tied the halter straps behind her neck.

Smoothing down the skirt, she stood in front of the full length mirror then gave a quick twirl. The layered skirt flared open with every spin, showcasing her shapely legs and giving just a tiny peek of the garters. It was the perfect blend of sexy and sweet. Now with every pleat, stocking, and ribbon in place, there was only one tiny touch. Sakura picked up a little blue bottle, unscrewed the top to release the powdery scent in the air, and swiped the applicator tip along the wrists then either side of her neck.

She looked at her reflection in the mirror and the woman sparkling before her definitely looked like she was in love, "I can't believe so much happened in so little time. It's almost like I've been living in a fairytale. Nothing and I mean NOTHING can knock me off my cloud!" Familiar barking heard in the distance alerted Sakura that her date would soon be arriving. She rushed to the window, pushed the candy-striped petunias out of the way, and leaned over the sill.

Down the street came a huge tan and white colored dog with a young man dressed in a tux, riding on it's back. Kiba grinned with that trademark cocky grin and the light glinted off his left fang. He jumped off Akamaru's back and used chakra to climb the apartment wall to the window where his blushing date waited for him. She caught how his eye lingered on her fuller physique and Sakura sent another silent thanks to the shopkeeper.

He was quick to lift the bouquet of red roses then gave Sakura a kiss on the cheek, "Ready for the most romantic evening of your life, baby?"

She gathered the flowers in her arms and took a deep breath of their potent fragrance, "I am, if you are." She held out a hand for him to take and they dropped out of the window, landing safely next to Akamaru. The huge dog lowered his body as Kiba lifted Sakura onto the dog's back then Kiba slipped behind her.

"Okay boy, onward to the first stop!" The dog barked before he took off running. They bounded along the pavement and when the streets became too crowded, Akamaru jumped over the people and onto the rooftops.

As curious citizens stared and red shingled roofs flew by them, Sakura turned her head to Kiba and asked, "Where are we going?"

He tightened his grip on her waist with a sly smile, "It's a surprise. But don't worry, we're almost there. Close your eyes now."

"Must I," she whined playfully.

"Humor me, babe." And Kiba flashed his grin at momentarily forcing Sakura to blink from the glare. She kept her eyes squeezed shut until she felt Kiba's hands carry her off Akamaru then gently place her on the ground.

She fluttered her eyes open then stared at the sea of shimmering lights of the city below, "The top of the Hokage Monument? This is the secret romantic spot?"

Looking a bit unsure himself, Kiba still cleared his throat then swept his arm wide, "Not an original idea, but you must admit the view of Konoha from here is breathtaking and what better place for quality entertainment than Mother Nature herself. The night wind dances with the trees and the stars are shining like diamonds. They all beg for our attention tonight. Shouldn't we indulge them?" He unwrapped a blanket hiding in a packet attached to Akamaru and spread it on the grass.

Sakura smiled at how smoothly he presented their hometown and she cooed, "My Kiba, you have the touch of a poet in your soul. Impressive."

Suddenly feeling awkward from Sakura's compliment, he scratched the back of his neck and replied, "Er, thank you. How about them stars?" He directed her attention to a blanket spread out on the grass and they sat down to enjoy the view. The minutes ticked away and they sat on the ground, watching the stars twinkle at them. Nice as the night sky was, Sakura nervously searched for someway to begin a deep conversation.

Sakura took a breath then blurted out, "Do another one. Only longer," Holding clasped hands in begging, she gazed at him with pleading green eyes.

He went stiff then tried to covertly wave his hand in the air behind him, "Another what?"

She giggled at his modesty and tapped him on the knee, "A poem, silly."

"Oh, I don't usually do stuff like that out of the blue. Inspiration's gotta hit me, you know," His arm swung out and pointed to a random star far left of Sakura's vision, "Wow, look at that star. It's really bright! I bet that's gotta be an old super nova."

She turned to see which one he pointed to, "Where, where? Are you sure, 'cause I don't see anything out of the ordinary. Kiba?" Sakura looked back at her date only to find the spot next to her empty.

"Kiba, hello? Where did he go?" She stood, circled around to catch a glimpse of him in the shadows and even looked for Akamaru who managed to disappear as well, "Are we all playing Hide-And-Seek now?" When five minutes passed, her foot began tapping out of annoyance. Then Sakura realized that she should give the guy the benefit of the doubt. Maybe he needed some privacy in case he had to answer nature's call.

He returned with a grin wider than usual and opened his mouth to explain when Sakura stopped him by raising a hand.

"Not a big deal, Kiba," she said giving him an awkward smile, "When ya' gotta to go, you gotta to go."

His eyes rolled upwards and shrugged his shoulders high, "Right, you got me! Guess I had too much soda earlier."

"So now that is out of the way, we can sit down and cuddle," She sat back down on the blankets and patted the spot next to her. He obliged and wrapped an arm around her shoulders.

Sakura's cheeks turned a soft rose color and folded hands on her lap, "Since we've managed to get a few minutes alone. I thought now might be a discrete time to bring up that sensitive subject we've been avoiding for a while now."

Kiba tugged at his collar then lowered his voice to a soft growl, "Uh, we're not as alone as you might think," he gestured to a bunch of bushes that flashed a soft light before shaking for a few seconds, "Maybe we should wait until we get to the restaurant. It'll be so busy in there, we might have more privacy."

Also frustrated from the intrusion, she leaned back with Kiba, "You're right. Let's just enjoy the quiet while we can. We're due at The Butterfly Lounge after sunset."

Kiba cut his eyes side to side and grinned mischievously, "We don't have to be prompt. No sense being first in line, only to be bored to death waiting for everyone else to arrive."

Sakura drew closer to his side, "I agree. Nothing like being fashionably late and making a grand entrance."

An hour after a good-sized crowd had gathered at the restaurant entrance, Kiba and Sakura fell in line with the rest of the guests. They stood behind a Hyuuga couple dressed in more traditional kimonos and Sakura was surprised to recognized the two people standing before them.

"Good evening, Kou-san," Sakura nodded to her friends and lightly touched the expensive embroidery on Hinata's kimono, "And how lovely you look, Hinata. Pardon my asking, but where is Shino? Aren't you supposed to be on the date with him?"

Hinata stuck out her lower lip in a pout and threw a hateful glare toward Kou, "My father has decided that Kou will be my chaperone for tonight."

Sakura slumped in disappointment for her friend, "Good grief! I don't understand why your father won't let Shino honor his obligation to you. It's so unfair."

In a strangely calm mood, Hinata shrugged, "That may be, but with p-patience and wisdom, one can find the path to enlightenment and contentment. Specifically, in five... four... three... two-". Hinata stepped closer to Kou and gave his sleeve a tug, "Kou-san, didn't you say that Samui-san was supposed to be at her hotel packing to leave? It's strange because I see her heading this way."

Activating his kekkei genkai, Kou looked to the north then gasped, "Oh no, how did she know I'd be here?!" Sure enough there was Samui, that cool, calculating, conniving kunoichi who could stop a man's heart at a hundred paces with her killer curves and icy blue eyes. She marched down the street, rocking a skin-tight dress with sky-high heels.

Hinata gasped and lightly slapped her own cheek, "Dear me! Maybe I should have not mentioned to Omoi-san that you would be accompanying me to the Akimichi restaurant. Looks like I'll need to find another date tonight!" She bowed politely to her friends, "Kiba, Sakura, if you will excuse me."

Kou wailed after his young cousin as she tottered away to find Shino, "Hinata-sama, don't leave me with that maneater!" But it was too late for him. The crowd parted and let the voluptuous blond kunoichi of the Kumokagure shinobi walk through. The blond locked her sights on the frightened man and stalked toward her prey.

Samui pushed Kou into the brick wall, grabbed him by the collar, and lowered his gaze down to her level, "There will be no more running, no hiding, and no hunting you down, Kou. Tonight, you will eat a sumptuous meal with me. I will laugh at your sparkling conversation. Then we'll head back to my hotel for earth-shattering, mind blowing sex until every last bit of our energy is spent. Understood, Hyuuga?"

Caught by the intense heat in her blue eyes, he nodded mutely then let himself be dragged by the kunoichi to the top of the line and they smoothly passed through the velvet rope without any resistance from the concierge.

Kiba blew out a long whistle, ""That was rather aggressive of her. I don't think I've ever heard so much as a peep out of that woman the entire time Kumo's been visiting Konoha."

Sakura muttered, "I suppose when your biological clock is ticking, it helps to cut through the crap."

When they reached the head of the line, the concierge held his palm out and asked Kiba, "Welcome to the Butterfly Lounge. Invitation, please."

Kiba smiled, reached into his coat pocket, and gave the waiting concierge a white envelope. The man opened the envelope and slid out the little card. Sakura wasn't sure, but she thought she caught a glimpse of some money. But the entire envelope was secreted away before she could confirm it.

"Go on then," sighed the concierge, "Good thing for you tips are slow tonight." He unhooked the velvet rope and waved them through.

"What did he mean by that," Sakura scratched her forehead in confusion.

Kiba laughed and patted his date's hand, "Ignore him. He's just jealous that he has to cater for this exclusive party instead of being invited."

A hostess appeared from out of nowhere, bowed before the couple, then redirected them through a long hall filled with lit candles and strategically positioned vases of roses with signs advertising various florist shops. At the end of the hall was a heavy velvet curtain and the hostess pressed a button which made the curtain pull back revealing a huge ballroom filled with soft music and delicious food. Soft candlelight and a mirror ball high overhead offered the romantic lighting that would make the ugliest duckling shine like a swan. Couples mingled about the restaurant, having a good time eating, dancing, and enjoying intimate romantic moments.

The conductor from the band held up a hand to halt the music then redirected the audience's attention, "And here they are. Our star couple of the night, folks! Please help me welcome Inuzuka Kiba and Haruno Sakura to the Butterfly Lounge." A bright spotlight flashed onto Sakura and Kiba's position and they plastered forced smiles on their faces despite the stinging in their eyes.

As polite applause erupted from around and below, Kiba proudly held out the crook of his arm and Sakura dutifully wrapped a hand around it. They walked down the middle of the staircase as the spotlight followed them down to the dance floor. There was a hostess waiting for them at the bottom and led them around the other guests before seating them at their table, where they had a fabulous view of the dance floor. They automatically moved their chairs from opposite sides of the small table to side by side, sitting merely a hand's width apart.

Sakura looked around the room and searched for familiar faces. Kakashi was busy planting kisses on Kurenai's bare arm in their little corner. Hinata had found Shino and they were walking for the dance floor where Neji and Tenten were already enjoying each other's company. In a dark corner, Kou was fighting his baser instinct as Samui made life for him very, very hard and Sai drew portrait after portrait of the luscious Mizukage as she posed for the intense artist. Sakura did a double-take to see Naruto and Kauri sitting well within each other's personal space that didn't involve fighting fists. A quick shake of her head and Kauri flipped a portion of her red hair over the shoulder, revealing that she was embroiled in an arm wrestling match with Naruto.

Sakura tapped Kiba and pointed out her teammate, "How about that!"

Just as amazed, Kiba grinned at the sight, "At least they stopped competing with each other for the night."

As happy as she was to see so many people, there was someone missing. Sakura couldn't put her finger on who until Chouji walked in with Sabuku Temari hanging off his arm. Yamanaka Ino! That's who was not where she was supposed to be. Sakura searched the shadows, but her best friend was nowhere to be found.

'Damn you, Ino-pig.' Sakura crossed arms and seethed in her seat, 'She's late on purpose so she could upstage Kiba and mine's grand entrance.'

"Something bothering you, Sakura-chan?" Kiba reached over to his date and softly drew a palm along her cheek. He easily redirected her attention to him by gazing deeply in her eyes until Sakura felt like melting into his arms.

She leaned her shoulder into his and sighed, "Nothing's bothering me anymore, Kiba-kun."

"That's good," Kiba smiled as he looked into beautiful green eyes, "Because I really wanted to ask you something important."

As their foreheads drew closer together, Kiba took Sakura by the hand and murmured, "Would you go on another date with me, Sakura? A real one. When all this craziness has died down, I would like to take what we have going on a lot more seriously."

She nodded, "Admittedly, it's difficult to have a real relationship when there's so many people sticking their noses in your business. But I'm willing to take that chance in taking this to the next level, Kiba-kun."

Kiba gave her fingertip a light kiss and as they drew closer, their hands became further entwined. She heard her own breath quicken from the anticipation of tasting Kiba's lips again.

They moved at the same time, pressing their mouths together with abandon in a long, slow, smoldering kiss. His lips felt firm and confident against her own that made Sakura wanting more of him. She in turn encouraged Kiba further by boldly caressing her tongue over his sharp canines and she felt the feral growl rumble within his throat.

There was some commotion from the a corner of the restaurant, but none that mattered to the kissing couple. The world could be on fire and they would remain lip-locked until Kiba and Sakura decided they had their fill of each other. She heard an annoyed female voice try to get her attention in the distance. But as long as Kiba's tongue was doing such wonderful things, there was no way Sakura was gonna break away.

"Fine then, Forehead," quipped Ino then held up her camera and snapped a photo, "I'll just head back to my date and suck face for an hour too. Hmph!" The blond woman swirled around, stuck her nose the air, and sashayed over to the stoic red-head waiting in one of the VIP booths.

When they finally broke the kiss, Kiba murmured while dragging his lips along Sakura's chin and ear, "Did you hear something?"

"Just Ino's bitching again." Sakura drew in a sharp breath from the shivers Kiba kept sending down her spine then whimpered when his fangs dragged lightly along the skin.

"Did you know that you make the sexiest sounds when I kiss you."

She opened half-lidded eyes to look straight into Kiba's brown eyes, "Do I?"

He nodded, "Very soft, very sweet."

She smiled and whispered for only him to hear, "You know what else sounds really sweet?"

He turned to nuzzle the tip of his nose with hers, "Hmmm?"

"A thousand ryo," Sakura reared backwards in her chair as she opened a palm that expected to be filled. It was supposed to be a simple business transaction, but she couldn't stop a smile from breaking through.

She went into a fit of giggles and tried to stop a blush, "I'm sorry. Very unprofessional of me to giggle like a silly little girl, but A THOUSAND! That amount of money still sends me to the moon. To think that you would shell out that kind of cash for me is amazing! It's done wonders for my self-esteem, I can tell you. Anyways, you said earlier that you would pay me once we were at the restaurant and here we are."

"Ah, yes. Here we are," He fumbled with a napkin and looked ready to run. Sakura wondered why all of sudden all the noise died down and she felt the entire room go still. She looked around at the people pretending not to be listening then returned to Kiba, who was looking at someone in the distance, possibly his teammates. Sakura wondered what kind of advice the rest of Team Eight was relaying to him. But when she looked over her shoulder, Shino and Hinata were back to slow dancing in the middle of the dance floor. Hinata gave her friend a reassuring smile and continued to enjoy swaying to the music in Shino's arms.

Getting that troubled feeling in the pit of her stomach, Sakura looked to her date for reassurance, "Is everything alright, Kiba?"

He slouched then looked his date in the eye, "The truth is, Sakura. I don't have the money. My whole paycheck was spent the moment I got it and I'm broke for the next two weeks. I can't even cover for this dinner."

Sakura laughed at the absurdity of Inuzuka Kiba being broke then stopped when she saw that he was serious, "You're not joking. The money's really gone? I don't understand. What about the envelope? I saw money in there. How could this have happened?"

He dropped his head into his hands and moaned, "It wasn't supposed to happen to begin with and I certainly didn't mean for our date to go this far. Somehow things got carried away and I felt sorry for you-"

"You felt sorry for me," squeaked Sakura. Kiba's words faded to the background as blood rushed hot and furious through her entire body, making her glowing fists tighten.

Kiba paled with fear, making his red clan marks stand out further, and held his hands up to placate her, "Wait! That came out wrong. It's just that you looked so pitiful after you tripped and everyone knew that you would be upset if you were bought as cheaply as Anko."

"Hey," came a shout from the other side of the restaurant.

His words came faster as Kiba tried to defend himself, "You see, all I wanted to do was get the ball rolling, but then Shino's bugs kept messing around in my pants."

Tilting her head slightly, Sakura went slack jawed from the mental image, 'How the hell does Shino fit in this? Or anyone else for that matter. Oh my god, everyone I know is here and they're watching!'

She gripped the table's edge in horror, 'INO! INO IS HERE!' A quick glance to the left revealed her best friend with a evil devil's grin that grew bigger than what should be physically possible for a human being. Sakura felt the room spin around her like some sadistic merry-go-round. At the same time, humiliation heaped onto her shoulders in wave after wave as friends' faces mirrored her own shock and confusion.

'If he couldn't even cover tonight's dinner, what was gonna happen? Disappearing while sticking me with the check or us washing dishes? How dare he do this to me and in public!' Sakura felt her temper rise higher and quicker than it had in a very long time, taking only a few seconds for her to reach boiling point. She could feel the rush of blood to her head and struggled to keep a tight lid on her turbulent emotions.

'But it's okay. I'm in control of my feelings and I'll let the anger roll off my back,' She could hold out and keep her composure as long as Kiba didn't do or say one more stupid thing.

"...Everyone assumed that Lee would have more than enough money and then I wouldn't have to pay-"

Blind rage took over as Sakura sprang from her chair and her fist shot out with Kiba still in the middle of pronouncing the next word. He went flying backwards through tables, chairs, then eventually crashing into the wall adjacent to the kitchen. When the dust cloud cleared, Sakura still had her fist in the air and she heaved heavily from the strain of getting her temper under control. Kiba was lying under a pile of rubble with the kitchen staff gawking down at what used to be the dessert station.

A waitress peered at Kiba's twitching foot and whispered what everyone wondered, "Is he dead?"

…...


	2. Chapter 2

I do not own Naruto nor make any profit from it

Chapter Two

Three months earlier...

The new shinobi hospital stood bright and shiny as did most of Konohakagure years after being razed to the ground by the Akatsuki three years ago. Civilians and ninja wandered in and out of the medical complex with everything returning to business as usual before the attack. The village was still rebuilding with the essentials finished first, but followed by the residential and retail districts. The spirit of fire continued to burn in Konoha and it was agreed that everything was gonna be bigger and better.

Weary from a long morning of medical examination after the next, Sakura and Ino pushed through the doors of the emergency ward and they checked out for lunch about an hour after everyone else.

"Oooh my aching head," moaned Ino as she rubbed her temples with healing chakra, "I've had one hell of a day and it's only half done."

"I know what you mean," grumbled Sakura and opened the break room door for the both of them. The two medic-nin plopped themselves at the table in the break room. In a corner were a couple of other nurses on their lunch break and sitting next to a television playing an old movie.

Sakura tilted her head back to get a better look at the screen, "Ugh another romance musical."

"What's wrong with that," said Ino as she picked up her onigiri, "Sweet beautiful love set to catchy musical numbers."

Unimpressed, Sakura rolled her eyes while opening her lunch and stuck out her tongue, "Blech! How could you idolize such stupidity. Look at her twirling and skipping like an absolute twit, spouting nonsense about changing men and wearing fancy clothes. A wannabe ballerina with no clue of what life has in store for her. Life's not lovely," she shouted back at the television, "In fact IT SUCKS! It sucks harder than a twenty ryo whore!"

"Ugh!" gasped the others, "Really! Of all the nerve," Upset by Sakura's ranting, the two nurses picked up their bento boxes and rushed out of the break room.

Placing hands on hips, Ino clucked her tongue at the other medic, "That was unnecessary, Sakura-chan."

Sakura shrugged and continued eating, "On the contrary, now we get the break room all to ourselves."

Then door swung opened and the head medic on duty walked through, "Hello, girls."

"Hello, Shizune-neesan," chimed Sakura and Ino.

To Sakura's annoyance, Shizune flipped the television back on and chirped, "Ooh, I haven't seen this in years!"

"Not again," whined Sakura, "What's so fascinating about a sad, pathetic creature mooning over some stupid unattainable guy. Leave it to the movies to create fantasies then laugh when daydream castles crack at the seams!"

Shizune chuckled as she poured coffee into a mug and sat next to Ino, "Don't take the movie so seriously, Sakura. This part is about young love in it's pure, virginal form."

With a nasty sneer, Sakura mumbled into her tea, "Virginal is right."

"I meant in a good way," chided Shizune, "True love, unadulterated by the hassles and confusion that having a normal relationship brings."

"If it's obviously not real then why encourage this horrible dribble?"

Shizune studied the pink medic nin with pity in her eyes, "Because it's nice to dream, Sakura. Don't you dream anymore?"

The nineteen year old snorted, "Those kind of dreams are for suckers."

Ino used a hand to cover her mouth and whispered to Shizune, "Sakura's going through an angsty phase. There's nothing you can do or say to change her mind. After what happened with Sasuke, she lost her inner-romantic and it was replaced with a bra-burning feminist."

"I don't care what you two are whispering over there," interrupted Sakura who didn't like being talked about behind her back, "But you won't catch me dancing about my bedroom half-naked, singing, and glowing like a firefly hopped up on hormones."

"Sure Sakura," Ino sneered at her best friend, "Whatever you say, but when you do fall in love and make a total fool of yourself, I will be there to rub your nose in every last bit of humiliation."

"Then you'll have to wait a long, long time," Sakura bit into an almond cookie and settled into her chair like a queen on her throne, "Cause there's no way that will happen. Not in a million years!"

Shaking their heads at her, Ino and Shizune gave up and walked out of the break room.

….

It was late that afternoon when Shizune poked her head through the office of the Hokage. She checked to see if her boss was hard at work with mission requests and heard the woman swearing at the never ending mountain of paperwork.

Figuring now would be a good time to distract her superior, Shizune knocked and carried some more papers to set on the Hokage's desk, "Tsunade-sama, If you have a moment to spare, I have a special request from Sarutobi Kurenai."

"Oh no," groaned Tsunade, "What is it now?" She placed the pen down and rubbed the bridge of her nose in hopes of alleviating her headache.

Shizune pulled out a request form and gave it to Tsunade, "She handed this to me yesterday and asked if I could rush this to you. The Konoha Academy is running low on funds. They need money for new supplies and repairs. The carpenters we hired after the attack were quick, but Kurenai noticed water damage from leaks in the window frames and some doors are about to fall of their hinges. Also the orphanage basement flooded last night, which killed the hot water heaters, and their roof is overdue for some repairs as well. "

"Damn! When it rains, it pours," Tsunade drummed her fingers on the desk, "I'm sure there must be some place in the budget that we can squeeze a bit of money from."

"Only a pittance in compared to the need, Tsunade-sama."

"Well then!" Tsunade clapped her hands together and sang, "Looks like it's fundraising time."

Shizune sighed, "Again? That's getting old. People are sick of cookies, bake sales, and magazines." She leaned over the desk and whispered, "And a little tip, ma'am. No one really reads magazines anymore. They just go online."

Tsunade leaned back in her chair and looked out the window for inspiration, "You're right, Shizune. We need something new idea that's eye-catching, sexy even...," Then she clapped her hands in triumph, "Or we need something old, as in an old fashion 'Slave-Girl Auction'!"

"Goodness no," Shizune smiled at ridiculous idea then it faded when she recognized that excited look on the Hokage's face. It was just like every other time that Tsunade gambled, "You're kidding, right? Tell me you're kidding!"

"IT'S PERFECT! The willing ladies are put up for auction for only one date night. Sexual favors not required... though I'm sure a few kunoichi I know wouldn't mind the attention. We could even extend invitations to the other villages. Each might have a super-rich tycoon willing to get in on the action as well. That way we have a wider net to pull in more money. Yes, I can see the ryo rolling into the coffers now! Believe me Shizune, it'll be a sure fire way to raise money while having fun."

Shizune wasn't so sure, "Fun for who, I might ask. There's a lot to take into account, Tsunade-sama. Where will we hold the event? Who will be the auctioneer? What restaurants will want to participate? Will the dinners be included in the final bid or donated? We don't even know if any of the women will agree to such a tasteless and possibly immoral flesh peddling contest."

Tsunade sighed at her assistant's insistent logic, "Fine, if you wanna be politically correct. How about we change the name to Most Eligible Bachelorette Charity and I'll be sure to emphasize the 'Non compulsory' clause on the flyer."

Tsunade reached into her desk for a pen and blank scroll, "It will only be volunteers and if not enough girls sign up then we can cancel it. But I plan on being first on the list. If this goes as well as I hope, maybe next year we'll do a Slave Boy Auction. Oooh, now there's a thought!" The Hokage's eyes veered off into space as her imagination went into overdrive until Shizune snapped her fingers.

"Okay," broken from her daydream, Tsunade finished the first paper, "Here's a missive to give the encryption department then have them send copies to all the kages."

Shizune sweat-dropped as her boss joyfully wrote her own name on the Charity List, "Very well, I suppose it won't hurt to ask if any women would be interested." She held out her hand to have Tsunade slap the scrolls in it. Shizune trudged out the door, grumbling the entire way. Half-way to the encryption department, survival instinct tingled in Shizune's head and the woman unrolled the Charity scroll to find who's name was second on the list.

"TSUNADE-SAMA!"

...

"Isn't this a bit extreme," asked Kurenai after she listened to Shizune's account of the meeting, "Is the budget that tight this year?" The two kunoichi and Kurenai's three year old, Hiruzen sitting on her lap, waited at Ichiraku's Ramen Bar as Ayame handed them their bowls of steaming noodles. They bowed their thanks then dug into the delicious food.

"Unfortunately yes," Shizune stirred her ramen absentmindedly and sighed, "Tsunade-sama might be on to something. It would be a nice distraction from all the stress going on with the rebuilding."

A voice blasted from behind the cotton flaps behind them, "Hello, ladies. Move over! I'm hungry as a horse!" Anko plopped next to Shizune, reached past Kurenai, grabbed the scroll, "Interesting fundraiser. Most Eligible Bachelorettes, huh? More like Unable To Get A Date bachelorettes."

"Yes," grumbled Shizune as she grabbed the list back, "So should I put you underneath my name?"

Anko stuck her tongue out then shrugged, "Why not. I got nothin' better to do and after all, it is for charity."

"You just want a free meal and get laid. How about you, Ayame," Kurenai looked over the bar and pointed to the scroll, "You're a single gal. Would you like to donate a date for the academy and orphanage?"

Ayame waved a dismissive hand and smiled politely, "Oh, I would in a heartbeat, if it wasn't for Iyashi-san. He's been visiting me everyday for the past two weeks. It might hurt his feelings if I go on a date with someone other than him."

"Iyashi," muttered Anko then sucked in her noodles in one go, "Are you talking about Iyashi, the medic who helps us in the Chuunin Exams?"

Ayame nodded happily, "That's right. Do you know him?"

"You could say that," Anko coughed behind one fist, "Player!" And she went back to slurping down her soup.

The cloth flap from the far end lifted up and a man sat himself down on a stool, "Hello, Ayame-chan. How are you doing? You look especially lovely today."

The waitress glowed and whispered to the others, "That's him." Then she hurried to the other side of the bar to take his order, "Why thank you, Iyashi-san. What would you like to eat?"

"I'll have the beef this time," and the guy gave Ayame a flirty wink. She giggled and went right to work combining his meal. The other women kept to themselves at the other end of the bar and quietly watched him from the corner of their eyes. When Iyashi finished his dinner, he gave Teuchi and Ayame his thanks then glanced at the bill the cook handed to him and winced ever so slightly.

Ayame quickly snatched the tab from his hand and gushed, "Oh don't worry about the meal this time. It's on me."

"You are such an angel, Ayame-chan," Iyashi grinned at the waitress then dared to tickle her chin, making her blush and giggle so much that her father grunted disapprovingly at the guy's chutzpah.

Ayame turned dreamy-eyed as she sighed wistfully, "Iyashi-san, the weather man say it's going to be such a beautiful night. We should do some stargazing together on the Hokage Monument."

Iyashi nodded and quickly reached for a flap, "Absolutely. That is a great idea. Have a good day all!" And the guy ducked out of the stand and hurried down the street, barely leaving a trail of dust.

Teuchi scowled at his daughter, who held her ground defensively and snapped back at him.

"What? It keeps him coming back and he'll ask me out sooner or later," she tucked the bill into her apron pocket, "You can take it out of my paycheck. So you don't have to worry about the money."

The old man grunted, "It's not the money I'm worried about." Then he looked over at the three kunoichi, "Shizune-san?"

"I'm already on it," said the medic nin and sure enough, the list was already spread out and pen scrawling down Ayame's name.

Shizune held the scroll up and muttered, "So is there anyone else you can think of that needs to have their name on the list?"

Kurenai put her chopsticks down with a sigh, "If we're going with that kind of criteria, one girl's name already comes to mind. Let me add Hyuuga Hinata. Naruto has been avoiding her lately and it's confusing the poor girl."

Shizune handed Kurenai the scroll, "Don't you think you should ask her father's permission first?"

"It'll have to be handled delicately," said Kurenai and gave back the list, "But there's a good chance that we will see eye to eye in regards to Hinata's happiness."

Anko looked over Shizune's shoulder and scrutinized the names written so far, "Strange, I don't see your name there, Kurenai. This whole thing started because of your request."

The woman laughed and shook her head, "I'm a widow in her thirties with a kid. No one's going to be interested in me."

"You never know," said Shizune while writing Sarutobi Kurenai underneath Hinata's name, "The more names we have, the more money we'll raise for the academy and orphanage. Every little bit helps, even if it's only ten ryo."

"Gee," drawled Kurenai as she twirled her chopsticks in the air, "Glad to know I'm worth ten ryo."

Shizune left the money for her food and got up from her chair, "Alright, then. Not a bad start so far. I'll pass this around the hospital and see if any nurses or medics might be interested. I know Yamanaka Ino will jump at this."

Kurenai nodded as she got up as well and swung Hiruzen onto her hip, "That's true and whatever Ino does, Sakura always follows to compete with her. So that's another girl right there."

Shizune rolled her eyes upward, "Er, I don't know if that will happen this time, but it's worth a shot."

As the day wore on, the names on the scroll multiplied like mad and Shizune was amazed at the how positive the women were about the charity auction. She walked down the hall toward the nurse's station to pick up the growing list and noticed Ino and Sakura clocking out from their day.

Shizune hurried to catch them before they left, "Ino, Sakura! I need to talk to you."

Ino crossed her arms and scowled, "If another nurse called in sick, neither of us are covering for her. Sakura and I are outta here!"

"No," laughed Shizune and reached behind the desk to pull out the scroll, "Nothing like that." She opened the list up, did a mental count of the new additions, then turned it around for the two kunoichi to see.

"Tsunade-sama is calling it 'The Most Eligible Bachelorette Charity Auction' and we're looking for women willing to donate a date for charity. Would you two be interested?"

Ino looked down the list with glee, "The Most Eligible- bleh! That is quite a mouthful, isn't it. But I'd love to! How could I not volunteer?" She quickly grabbed the pen Shizune held out and scribbled her name at the bottom. Ino handed the pen to Sakura fully expecting her friend to join only to see the girl with a deep, deep frown.

"I don't believe this," sputtered Sakura, "This is worse than a popularity contest or even a beauty pageant. You're auctioning off women to men-"

"Not necessarily to men only," interrupted Shizune, "We are open to equal opportunity bidding. He, she, or it may enjoy the company of the woman of their choice as long as they've got the money."

Sakura stomped her foot, "It's prostitution!"

"It's for charity," shouted Ino and pushed the pen into Sakura's face, "Just sign the list already!"

Sakura spun on her heel and crossed her arms in firm determination, "NO!"

"SIGN IT! Forget it, I'll do it for you." Ino took the pen and positioned it on the scroll.

Sakura gasped, "You wouldn't dare!"

Ino sneered evilly and started writing the first stroke of Sakura's name, "Oh wouldn't I?"

"Put the pen down!" Sakura jumped at Ino and they both went tumbling onto the hospital floor. The blond tried to kick the other away, but Sakura was stuck to her like glue.

Keeping the pen out of Sakura's reach, Ino croaked as Sakura pulled on the girl's shoulders, "This is... for your own good, S-Sakura."

Shizune peeled the two girls apart then carefully put the scroll on the desk for safety sake, "Ino, this event is entirely voluntary. If Sakura doesn't want to participate, then she doesn't have to. Simple as that."

Sakura huffed in triumph and blew her mussed pink hair from her eyes, "Ha! Now I'm going home and I don't want to hear one more stupid thing about this 'Auction'."

Ino grumbled under her breath as the two walked out the double doors, "Was only trying to help."

Then she leaned to the side and muttered softly into Sakura's ear, "Auction..."

Sakura paused for sec, "What?"

"Nothing," said Ino sweetly. Sakura eyed the blond then continued walking.

Ino stepped behind Sakura for a moment and whispered, "Charity."

Sakura spun around, "You said something, I know it."

"No I didn't." Ino stuck her nose in the air and kept walking, "Orphans!"

"Stop it, Ino! You won't guilt me into this."

Shizune sighed and watched the two nineteen year olds head down the street, their voices fading the further they went.

...

In Amekagure...

Ao walked along side his junior, Chojuro, and puffed himself up for the perilous task that lay ahead of him, "Just let me do the talking, Chojuro. Remember, it takes a real man with charisma and intelligence to walk right up to the Mizukage and ask such a dangerous kunoichi to put herself up for sale. Guts and strength! That's the ticket."

Ao absentmindedly fiddled with the patch over his eye then ventured into the Mizukage's office with a swagger in his step, "Good morning Mizukage-sama, have you heard about the Bachelorette Auction that the Leaf Village is hosting?"

"An auction," laughed the woman as she threw her head back, tossing her long auburn hair in the air, "What a ridiculous notion. Who would bother with such nonsense?"

The jounin crossed his arms and boldly sat on a corner of Mei's desk, "It would be something to consider, Mizukage-sama. From what I hear, the Hokage, most of her kunoichi, and some of the Sand kunoichi are participating. They expect to bring in a lot of revenue to help their villages."

Mei waved a uncaring hand in the air, "Good luck to them. I prefer the more sensible method of sending skilled shinobi on profitable missions."

Catching a glimpse of ample cleavage from Mei's low cut dress, Ao cleared his throat and decided to push his luck even further, "It would be foolish to dismiss such an opportunity, Mei-sama. I'd imagine that you would fetch a grand price for our village."

The room temperature dropped ten degrees as Mei slowly got up from her seat and leaned close to the jounin, "Ao, speak to me of this sexist meat market again," hissed the Mizukage from behind a menacing smile, "And I will kill you."

'Again with the threats!' Ao throat went dry and he wondered if he had enough time to make a run for it when a hesitant voice caught the kunoichi's attention.

"Uh, Mizukage-sama," Chojuro glanced from the floor to the Mei's face as he gathered the courage to speak, "I know that any amount of money would be far beneath your true worth, but would you consider doing this favor for the children of Kirikagure? You only have to give one date for the evening and it all goes to charity. The money would help our shinobi academy grow and supplement the orphanage fund. Please, for the kids?"

Mei's light green eyes softened at Chojuro's plea on behalf of the Mist children and her ominous cloud turned warm as summer sunshine. Walking past her desk, she ruffled his tufts of blue hair and looked beyond the black-rimmed glasses that framed the young man's face, "Of course, Chojuro. It would be an honor to help the next generation become as skilled and compassionate as you. Send a hawk back to Konoha with a message that I and any of our volunteers will be participating."

Ao grimaced as he watched Chojuro get another tender pat on the cheek by the beautiful redhead before she dismissed both of them.

Once he set the annoying boy on an errand, Ao stomped into the break room where other shinobi were relaxing, "Hmph, all the teacher's pet had to do was get cutesy and the most powerful shinobi in the Hidden Mist goes gooey. It's just not fair."

An inquisitive shinobi popped his head from around the corner, "So it's true? Is the Mizukage joining the auction?"

Ao nodded as he poured himself some coffee, "Thanks to little Chojuro. The squirt managed to talk the woman into it. Oi, oi, where's everyone going?"

"I don't know about you, " One jounin threw his coffee cup away and rushed down the hall, "But I'm gonna fill out a travel request and double check my savings account, maybe cash in some bonds."

Another stuffed the last of a doughnut into his mouth as he hurried for the door, "Same here."

The last fellow to run out the door yelled, "I'm gonna beg on hands and knees from my dad."

Ao scoffed as the room emptied of men, "What fools! Running off to check their finances as if heading to a sale at the candy store. Only a real man know exactly how much money he has at all times down to the decimal point... a man exactly like me." Thumping his chest with pride, he grinned wide until his sharp teeth glinted in the light. "It'll take a kage's ransom to outbid me!"


	3. Chapter 3

I do not own Naruto, don't I make any profit from it. I don't own "We Are The World" by Micheal Jackson. Relax, I put the bare minimum in.

Chapter Three

Late in the afternoon in Sunakagure...

Temari adjusted her giant fan on her back and whistled a happy tune as she wandered the halls of the Kazekage's tower after dropping off her travel papers at the front desk. Yesterday had been a very good day and if everything went according to plan the next few weeks were going to be even better. Almost two months ago letter came from the Hokage offering her the perfect answer to a problem plaguing her for the past three years. Albeit it was a temporary solution, but definitely the first step in the right direction.

'Correction, two problems!' The blond kunoichi grinned to herself as she imagined the outcome of the upcoming conversation which happened right on schedule. Two men, one shorter than the other, stepped out from the adjoining hall and stood in her path. Temari waited for them to confront her and she smirked at the brothers, who made a bad habit of being annoying jackasses.

Gaara glared at his sister with his black-rimmed eyes, "You signed up for the Charity Auction."

"That I did," Temari haughtily glanced between Gaara and Kankuro, "And there is nothing you can do about it. I cleared it with the council before sending an answer and they loved the idea. Konoha isn't the only village that could use a little extra cash, you know. I leave in three weeks and you two schmucks are stuck." It didn't matter that she was poking the Kazekage or former Shikaku jinchurriki in the chest. She was celebrating a major coup.

"You know better than to underestimate us, Temari," Gaara pushed her finger away.

The gutsy blond kunoichi shuffled around her brothers in triumph, "Hah! No more scaring guys away with your sick little puppet shows or reassigning my boyfriends to the furthermost stations at the borders. I'm going on a real date and you can't stop me."

Kankuro faced his sister down in a menacing growl in the hopes of resembling their father, "We'll kill whoever dares to buys you."

She laughed and tugged Kankuro's black hat over his eyes, "No you won't. Maime or rip limbs apart possibly, but not without pissing off our new allies. I have no intention anymore of letting you intimidate me from having a love life."

"We're only doing that in your best interest, sis," insisted Kankuro.

Temari frowned at his gall, "I will be damned if history repeats itself. I refuse to end up like Chiyo-baasama, sitting around useless and waiting to die. All the while doing nothing but figuring out how to prank my equally loser brothers."

"What's wrong with that?" Kankuro stepped forward, but was stopped by his little brother extending one arm.

"Let her go," ordered Gaara and the elder complied with a tiny scowl. The Sabaku brothers let Temari pass and they watched her strut proudly away.

Kankuro turned back to Gaara, "I can't believe that we'll let our sister sell herself to some creep? Or worse... Shikamaru."

The Kazekage turned his cold green eyes onto Kankuro, "Like hell we will. She's not the only one who can manipulate the council."

...

Late that night in the Hokage's private library, Tsunade sat in front of the Third's old scrying crystal and waited for a response from the two kages peering back at her from their own private communication device, "So gentlemen, I'm curious on what you think. Do you object Ei-sama?"

The Raikage slammed his thundering fist on a table making all three orbs shake in their stands, "I think it's a brilliant idea! A fundraiser will bring in more of the rich civilian clients who are still uncomfortable around shinobi. Won't be long before we're rolling in the dough."

The Tsukikage thoughtfully stroked his goatee and muttered, "My kunoichi might find this a fun distraction from the daily grind. I'll put the word out and see if we get any volunteers."

"Very good," said Tsunade, "As soon as I get your lists, I'll ask the hotels around ready their rooms for all the guest coming. Also from the last message I received from Kirikagure, Mei will also be joining the line up of lovely ladies selling their company for a romantic evening."

Onoki wiggled his bushy gray brows and chuckled, "Is that so?"

The Raikage rumbled at the little man, "Don't tell me you gonna be bidding on the Mizukage!"

"And why not?"

The Raikage poked a finger from his side of the orb and made Onoki's image bounce, "Well, look at you. One bra cup is bigger than your head."

Onoki squeezed back into the other image, "My stature may be a challenge, but I got it where it counts. Enough bags of gold that could sink three battleships."

The Raikage laughed so hard the walls in all three kage offices rattled, "Please, my pinky has got a piggy bank bigger than you."

"You mean your ONLY PINKY! What do you have to offer Mei, one hand man?

"Excuse me gentlemen," interrupted Tsunade and laughed at their enthusiasm, "But the Mizukage is not the only fetching bachelorette around."

The Raikage rubbed his goatee in thought, "You got a point, Hokage-sama. Your personal assistant is quite the impressive medic and we always had a thing for brunettes. Shizune, wasn't it? A brilliant woman! Is she participating as well?"

"She is signed up for the auction, Ei-sama... as am I." Tsunade ran fingers through her blond hair with flourish and threw a flirtatious wink at the two men reflected in the glass orb.

There was an awkward pause before the Tsukikage and Raikage went back to arguing over who had the bigger wallet. Tsunade glowered at the squabbling pair then cut the chakra to the scrying ball. She sulked at her own reflection, "Jerks!"

In the Land of Iron, the leader of the samurai picked up the short message that had been handed to him a few hours ago and his eyes perused the invitation once again. The man's outward appearance remained calm and placid, but inside his mind raced excited thoughts and various scenarios of how a simple entertaining event could bring the seven shinobi nations a little closer together.

Mifune signaled to the nearest secretary, "Would you mind clearing my schedule three weeks from now and send a reply to the Hokage that I would be attending the auction."

"Hai, Mifune-sama."

He returned to reading his pile of reports and smiled to himself, "A little diplomatic trip would be good for relations and it would be nice to see Tsunade-chan again."

…

Yamanaka Ino proudly marched down the middle of street toward Sakura's house with her teammates, Chouji and Shikamaru in tow, "You may call me a certified genius for I have come up with Plan: Convince Sakura To Sell Her Body!"

"Please, tell me that's for the charity," Shika mumbled with a glowing cigarette hanging out of his mouth.

"Of course," quipped Ino then she snatched the cigarette out of his mouth and chucked it into a passerby's open soda cup. Shika didn't bother stopping Ino, but he made sure to keep his last pack out of his teammate's sight.

Chouji scratched his temple in confusion, "Why do you think today is the day that she'll join you in the auction?"

The blond gave a long sigh as if tired of having to repeat herself, "Because underneath Sakura's protesting exterior beats a bleeding heart. I simply need to tug on the right strings and she'll be begging to join." Ino pressed the bell at the doorway leading to the Haruno household.

"I'll be right there," yelled a voice from a window above then Team Ten heard running footsteps to the front door. When the door opened, Sakura froze then glared down her foe, "Should have known. I don't care what you say, Ino. It's barbaric even if it's done in the name of charity."

"Such a jaded soul in one so young. Don't you understand that we would be enhancing and bettering the lives of innocent children who need our help. You and I are shinobi... KUNOICHI! It is our duty to help and protect those weaker than us," Ino hopped up the steps and wrapped her friend in a hug, "There's comes a time, when we head a certain call. When the world must come together as one."

Sakura's eye twitched in annoyance, "Ino, that's not an argument... that's a song."

Shikamaru and Chouji exchanged glances with the same thought running through their minds, 'Uh oh!"

Ino clutched Sakura tighter to keep her from escaping, "Yes, but WHAT a song! Just listen to the lyrics."

"_There are people dying_," Ino began to sway, bringing a terrified Sakura along with her, and singing softly, "_And it's time to lend a hand to life. The greatest gift of all._"

"Here it comes." Shikamaru grabbed his rotund teammate and they ran headlong into the nearest shop with enclosed glass windows.

Ino took in a huge lungful of air and ripped to the heavens, "WE ARE THE WORLD! WE ARE THE CHILDREN!" The street that was once teeming with pedestrians cleared in record time with everyone running and hands over their heads.

Chouji panted as he watched from the safety behind the glass windows, "Now she's going into the second verse. Did Ino say, 'Bleeding heart' or 'Bleeding Ears'? Sakura looks like she's going into shock."

"I wouldn't be surprised," said Shika as he shook out another cigarette from the box, lit it, and took a long, comforting drag, "Ino's father taped her singing in the shower one morning then gave the recording to the ANBU special ops. Her voice created a whole new interrogation technique that they use on S-class criminals. It gave Inoichi-san a promotion that year."

"That is wrong wrong wrong. Hey, looks like she's just about finished with Sakura."

Shika held Chouji back, "Give me another thirty seconds then I'll put this out... Okay, let's go."

"_It's true we'll make a better day. Just you and meee," _Ino tightly held Sakura by the collar, pulled her nose to nose and whispered, "Do it, Sakura. Sell your body!"

"You dirty bitch," Sakura hissed from under a dark cloud, "Fine, I'll do it. J-just promise you'll never sing at me again." Then the poor kunoichi burst into tears, grateful for getting out alive.

Ino smiled wide and released Sakura from her grip, letting the sobbing girl plop to the ground like lifeless jelly, "Wonderful! I'll go tell Shizune-neesan that you'll be participating."

Chouji was the first out of the store to check on the pink-haired kunoichi. He gently scooped up a sniffling Sakura in his arms and headed for the hospital, "A promotion, huh?"

Shika nodded as he followed after, "And a big fat bonus if he continued recording free material for them every year."

A horrifying thought occurred to Chouji, "Inoichi-san wouldn't encourage her to sing at the auction, would he?"

"Not if he wants to have grand kids."

...

It had been a week since Shizune declared Sakura's auditory senses fully rehabilitated and now she had to join the other women in turning Konoha upside down in their quest for the perfect outfit. Grumbling at the price tags, Sakura gazed into the window that seemed to beckon with their beautiful dresses made of smooth silk or luxurious satin. Each creation was hand embroidered with intricate designs that shimmered in the carefully placed lighting of the window stage.

Ino had her nose pressed into the glass of the next store and squealed with undisguised glee and lust, "Those shoes are gorgeous and look at the size of that diamond ring!"

Determined to resist temptation of useless excess, Sakura slapped her best friend in the shoulder, "It's not real. Diamonds don't sell for five ryu. You should know better than that, Ino."

"Of course I do," sniffed the blond kunoichi, "I can detect a fake gem from ten paces, but your average guy hasn't a clue. If I wanna land a rich suitor, I need to look like a rich bride. So bring on the bling, baby!"

Sakura rolled her eyes and tugged Ino away from the window, "Looks like the jewelry isn't the only thing fake around here. Come on, Ino. Let's find something a little less trashy and more upstanding."

The blond kunoichi refused to budge, "We're not going anywhere. This is the one." She held her ground against Sakura with the determination of a stubborn turtle.

"Don't be silly," Sakura paused when Ino still would not move then burst into laughter, "A stupid shop can not be The One. Remember when we were twelve? You made a point of declaring Sasuke-kun was The One."

"As I recall, you agreed with me at the time," Ino teased back at her friend.

Sakura had to concede, but she wasn't going to admit that publicly, "That's beside the point. Back when we were sixteen, Sai was next to be dubbed The One."

Ino folded her arms in annoyance, "He could still be. I've been dropping hints around him like crazy. So I don't see where this is leading."

A vein throbbed on the far side of Sakura's forehead, "My point is that your view of the world may be rosy-colored and exclaiming in a grand fashion that a store, pushing products of sweatshop labor and cheap paste, is THE ONE would qualify as an example of your usual rush to judgment."

"I don't see where this is leading," repeated Ino with a somewhat glazed look in her blue eyes while she had her nose pressed to the window and watched the pretty ring sparkle in the sunlight.

"You know what, Ino? You're absolutely right. As long as we make it make it back to the hospital in time for my shift, this shop could be freaking Shangri-La and Treasure Island rolled into one." Sakura glanced at her watch and dragged Ino through the door. A delicate chime went off over their heads, announcing their arrival, and two smiling saleswomen appeared from behind a curtain door.

They smiled and bowed to their customers, "Welcome to our shop, ladies! Are you looking for dresses, shoes, jewelry? We have all that and more."

Ino spread her arms wide and proclaimed, "You name it, we need it. Give us the whole shebang!" The women's eyes lit up like firecrackers, but Sakura was quick to bring their eagerness to a screeching halt.

"But within our budget," She interceded then whispered to her friend, "We do have to worry about dressing for our dates after the auction."

"Good point," The blond walked past the disappointed salesladies then started sorting through the racks of the more moderately priced duds, "We need to look good, but not fancy yet." And so an hour of trying on dresses and sorting accessories to compliment their choices produced two ecstatic kunoichi ready to impress their future dates.

As one lady rung up their purchases, the other saleswoman set a fancy display on the counter and started stacking little blue boxes in a pyramid. Ino pointed to the glitter laden display, "What is that?"

"Hmmm?" The saleswoman turned around from her cash register and realized this was a chance to make her commission even bigger today, "Oh this! It's a secret weapon that every woman should own. This will stimulate sexual appeal of whoever wears it and enhance the romantic mood of your partner. It promises to elevate your confidence and awaken the senses of the object of your desire." She took a small blue bottle out of the box to show the curious girls.

"Ah-ah-ah," The lady held the bottle out of Ino's reach and flourished a hand along the glass, "I don't know if you're ready for this... but then again I would kick myself if you miss this very important piece to a wardrobe."

Sakura inspected the bottle from afar and eyed it with a heavy dose of suspicion, "It's perfume."

"Not just any perfume. It is a scent made with a secret recipe of blended pheromones and essential oils. Never underestimate the subliminal power of a woman's scent. The loveliest feature is that this perfume changes from person to person, making your sex appeal explicitly unique to the wearer."

Sakura held up a finger, "Um, but that happens for any kind of-"

The saleslady cut her off and redirected Ino back to the bottle, "With this in your arsenal you can lure the man of dreams not just with your beauty, but with _chemistry_." With eyes wide and breathing heavily, Ino stretched out shaking hands and she took an unopened box from the saleswoman's grip as if it held the fabled fountain of youth.

Sakura frowned while sniffing the sample then put it back on the counter, "Eh I don't know. It smells nice, but not a hundred ryu nice, especially for only a few ounces."

"For you two, half off," quipped the lady, making Ino squeal and grab two more boxes.

Sakura shook her head at the excited blond then everyone was distracted when the door chime went off and all the women looked over their shoulder to see Inuzuka Hana dragging her little brother into the shop.

Hana held the guy by the collar of his leather coat and pulled him through the doorway, "Look Kiba, I've been sewing your ripped pants and cooking your meals just about every day this week. Mom is out of town and you owe me a boatload of favors. So you will help me get ready for the auction."

Kiba growled like a feral dog put on a leash for the first time, but that didn't deter his sister from pulling the twenty year old into the store filled with frilly lace and satin. The saleswoman forgot her latest conquests and hurried to meet the heir apparent of the Inuzuka Clan. After the other lady finished packing their purchases, Ino tapped Sakura on the shoulder and gestured for them to slip back into the changing rooms.

Hana bowed with the saleslady and was immediately directed toward their pricier stock. Kiba slunk off to the back where he could hide behind the rows of clothing, grumbling all the way, "It's not like her sewing and cooking are all that great. In fact, they suck balls! And now I'm being guilted into clothes shopping." Kiba felt his senses tingling whenever there was someone watching and glanced over his shoulder to make sure nobody could see him through the store windows.

"Man, what is that smell? This place stinks something nasty. Why does everyone always gotta go overboard on the potpourri. It always gives me a massive headache. The only way this could get worse is if-"

Ino poked her head through the changing room curtain and cooed, "Hellooo, Kiba!" The two young women stepped out of hiding, giggling at the comical way he jumped then tried to cover up being caught in a ladies' clothing store.

Annoyed that his nose failed to catch who exactly was in the shop with him, Kiba slowly turned around, "Ino, Sakura, you're here. It's nice to know that my bad luck is bottomless today. I see that you two are looking for a better quality of war paint?"

"That's none of your business, dog-boy," Ino faked interest in a nearby dress hanging off the arm of a mannequin "And there's nothing wrong with a lady wanting to make herself look pretty."

Kiba snorted at the kunoichi, "Pretty is one thing, but it's another thing entirely when a woman walks around looking like a kabuki actor."

Ino drew herself haughtily next to the jerk, "Like you would understand. Makeup is a subtle art that you guys can never appreciate."

"Bullshit! If that were true, then why is it possible for me to handle looking at you now."

Spitting mad, Ino raised her hand and was about to whack Kiba across the head when Sakura stepped in between them, "Ino, I think there's a pearl choker in the display case for only ten ryo."

"Really?" The blond left the other two behind and ran for the glass counter to search every nook and cranny.

Sakura turned back to Kiba and raised a pink eyebrow at him, "You're welcome."

"Bah," He thumbed his nose at Ino's back, "She couldn't lay a finger on me and we all know it."

"Don't be so sure," Sakura wandered to the other side of Kiba where the shoes were on display and started searching for her size. She didn't notice how Kiba's eyes slowly made their way down then back up her slim figure.

"Where's Akamaru?" She asked while lifting a red velvet pair then winced from the price, "He usually keeps you in a more grounded mood."

"He's at home with Kuromaru for extra training," Kiba growled through clenched teeth, "That lucky son of bitch."

Sakura paused in sorting through the rack and muttered angrily, "I would take offense to that kind of language, if it wasn't sorta true."

Kiba shrugged as he leaned into the wall, "Hey, he's my dog! He doesn't care."

Hana stepped out from her changing room, pulling up the side zipper of a red sheath dress, "Okay, Kiba! What do you think of this one?"

He glanced briefly then answered, "It's a dress." Every single woman in the store groaned and rolled their eyes upwards.

Hana sighed at her stupid little brother, "Typical cop-out! I meant, does it fit right? Too Baggy or too tight? Too long, too short, wrong color, not enough sequins?"

Kiba rubbed one temple with a finger then waved at the bottom of the dress, "Fine then... the sequins, definitely too many sequins."

Hana blinked in confusion then bent to check the hem, "Are you sure? Because there's barely any, just along here."

"Of course I'm not sure," yelled Kiba and threw himself into a chair, "Why did you drag me into this if you weren't going to take my opinion seriously." Hana frowned at her little brother then returned to the dressing room in a huff.

"You shouldn't talk to your sister like that," whispered Sakura from behind one hand, "She only wanted your help."

"Then next time she should know better than to ask me. I'm the wrong person for the job." Kiba sulked in his chair with one knee rapidly bouncing from pent up anxiety and aggression.

Sakura returned to the shoe rack, flipped over a pair of red and pink heels, and muttered under her breath, "Tch, someone's all piss and vinegar today."

"Tough talk from someone who used to hate the very idea of a slave-girl auction and now look at you... spending good money on a dress you'll wear once. Still I might check the auction out and see if you can go through with it. With your track record, I wouldn't be surprised if you _choked!_" Kiba smirked to see that he hit the mark right where it hurt. Sakura's hand was stopped in midair and head bent low.

Her voice quivered with barely controlled anger as she side-glared at him with hard green eyes, "You can be a real asshole, Kiba. Just because you're having a bad day you have to make everyone else miserable. Unlike you when I give my word to help someone, I do the best I can. Not kick and snivel like a spoiled baby the entire time."

Kiba hooted at his playmate's attempt to put him in his place, "Haruno Sakura is calling me a baby? Ah-hah! That's real messed up. Itty-bitty Sakura couldn't stand up for herself in preschool and it took Ino to rescue your fragile ego. Then comes along pathetic cry-baby Sakura who begged Naruto to bring back her Sasuke-kun despite the whole damn squad of us guys coming back more torn up than-"

"KIBA!" Hana came roaring out of her changing room with a black dress barely zipped up the side, grabbed him by the collar, and jerked him backwards to stop him from attacking Sakura anymore, "I can never take you anywhere without you stirring up shit."

Ino came running to Sakura's side when Hana first barked from the changing rooms and found the older woman pushing Kiba onto his knees, "What's going on here?"

"Kiba was about to apologize for acting like a crass bastard with no manners and even less good sense," Hana dug her claw like nails into his shoulders and growled, "Do it."

He squeezed his eyes shut and bent forward until his forehead touched the floor, "Haruno-san, I apologize for acting like a crass bastard with no manners and even less good sense."

Sakura looked down on Kiba as he waited for some response or when Hana decided to let up on the pressure she put on his back, which didn't look anytime soon, "You were lucky to have teammates who realized they need you as much as you need them."

Kiba glanced upward at the pink kunoichi before him with extreme sadness written all over her face and he felt like digging a hole to crawl in. Scenting the shame rising off him, Hana released her grip and let her little brother stand up.

"You're not the same kid who took every chance to knock Naruto down and I sure as hell am not the same pushover from the past. You may think you're the shit now, but last I checked you weren't the one who slammed a massive rampaging beast with one hit!" Holding her head high, Sakura grabbed her grinning best friend by the arm and made for the sales counter, "So if you want your teeth crushed like I did your foot, keep flapping your yap!"

The first saleswoman piled their purchases on the girls' arms while other saleslady holding the door open also raised a complimentary box of the blue perfume.

Grabbing the box without missing a beat, Sakura paused in the doorway long enough to point in the air and proclaim to her audience, "SHANNARO!"

After the two kunoichi disappeared from the window view, Kiba looked at the floor and shuffled his feet, "I didn't mean to hurt her like that, sis. I don't know what got into me."

Hana switched the red dress back over the black and sighed, "There are better ways of handling a crush, Kiba. Biting her head off does not work."

The saleslady walked up from behind Hana and waved another box of perfume under the Inuzuka's nose, "For you, half off."

...


	4. Chapter 4

I do not own Naruto nor make any profit from it.

Chapter Four

Naruto, Sai, Neji, Lee, Shino and Kiba sat in soothing steaming waters in the men's side of Konohakagure Hot Springs to escape the stress. Akamaru was stretched out on his side in the corner of the spa, enjoying a nap in the warm air. The lattice door slid open, revealing Shikamaru and Chouji who stepped onto the deck.

"Hey guys," said Chouji with a happy grin, "How's it going?"

"Watch out for Akamaru," Kiba warned as the two guys tiptoed around the gigantic dog that snorted in their direction, then rolled flat on his back to stick all four legs in the air.

Shikamaru peered at the odd sight, "The mutt must have a ton of back fat to keep him stable like that."

"Oi, watch it," Kiba yelled in Akamaru's defense, "That's all muscle there."

"Whatever you say," Shikamaru smirked as he carefully slipped into the water and from the heat seeping through his skin, "As long as he doesn't roll into the water, we're good."

Chouji slowly lowered himself into the spa. The water level rose several centimeters and a slight wave rolled toward Lee who was floating in the middle of the pool.

Lee sputtered from the water that filled his nose, forcing him to stand up and see the newcomers, "Oh it is you, Chouji-san. Afternoon to you both."

"Hey, Lee," Shikamaru dipped a hand towel in the hot spring, squeezed the excess water, then draped it over his face, "Ahhh, much better. It's headache overload out there."

Chouji nodded, "Ino has been crazy since she signed up for that charity auction."

"I would have to agree," Sai peered at Chouji with a furrowed brow, "She finds me everyday and keeps asking me questions about the auction. I don't understand what the fuss is about." Then Sai looked over at Shikamaru, "What do think of this slave-girl auction?"

"I don't," Shikamaru mumbled from underneath his towel.

"And better not let anything resembling female hear you say slave-girl," reminded Chouji, "Unless you enjoy getting your balls twisted into a double knot."

"Speaking of neutering," Naruto sneered then pointed at Kiba, "I heard someone tried to face off with Sakura-chan and ended up with a face full of carpet."

"And not in the good way," added Shino. That brought out smiles on just about everyone, but Kiba. Even Neji had a hard time not chuckling at the Inuzuka's expense.

Kiba sank a bit in the water and fumed with shame, "I already apologized to her. So leave it, Uzumaki."

"Didn't mean to touch a nerve there, Soggy Doggy. Just thought you knew better than to step on her toes," laughed Naruto then covered his mouth, "Oops!"

"You wanna take this outside?"

"Oh I couldn't fight my good buddy Kiba," Naruto stuck out his lower lip in pity, "Just wouldn't be fair with you being de-fanged and all."

"Fuck you, man!" The Inuzuka flipped Naruto the bird then swam away to stew in a warmer spot.

Revealing in the space, Naruto stretched out and floated on his back, "Ahhh, unlike some of you guys, this auction has become a huge problem for me. How am I going to choose between the two beautiful women in my life? Sakura or Hinata. Sakura is my teammate. She might be upset if I don't bid on her. But Hinata told me she loves me. I have to make a bid on her too."

Annoyed that the guy actually had to deliberate, Neji took a cleansing breath and whispered, "Let's see a pink demon with a mean right hook and ear-piercing screams or a shy heiress with a soft voice and inferiority complex. Which one, which one?"

Naruto was so absorbed in his own thoughts he didn't pick up Neji's hints and kept muttering, "Sakura or Hinata. Sakura or Hinata." He stopped floating when he realized the perfect solution, "OR Sakura and Hinata!"

Neji's eyes snapped open, 'What?" The rest of the guys in the pool also stopped talking to stare at Uzumaki

Naruto slammed a fist in the other palm, "That's what I'll do. I'll empty my savings account and buy both!" The amazing baka looked around and grinned brightly at the others.

'Am I hallucinating?' Neji gaped with everyone else at the audacity, 'Did he really say that?'

Lee moved closer to his teammate and whispered, "Do not concern yourself, Neji-san. I have plenty of money to buy Sakura-san. As much as I admire Naruto's determination, he does not compare to the fire that burns brightly in my heart for the beautiful cherry blossom."

Kiba's ears twitched when Lee spoke to Neji. He swam back to and casually asked, "So you plan on buying Sakura, Lee?"

Lee thumped his chest proudly, "Absolutely!"

"That's good," encouraged Kiba and gave Lee a thumbs up, "How much do you have saved up?"

Excited to boast of his hardwork, Lee gushed openly, "A little over three hundred ryo and I plan on earning more the next few days as Teuchi's delivery boy."

Shino grabbed Kiba by the ear and dragged him away from Lee, "That's not nice."

Kiba rubbed his sore ear and growled, "At least now we don't have to worry about Sakura. Lee will give Naruto good competition. Aren't you a little bit curious about how much you'll need?"

Shino didn't rise to the bait. He just sat in the water and let the steam fog the lens of his dark glasses.

Kiba took Shino's silence as a bad sign, "You mean you're not going to bid on Hinata?"

"Of course, I'm going to bid on Hinata," grumbled Shino, "The last thing Naruto needs is to think that he can have his cake and eat it too."

Kiba smiled and leaned back in the water, "Good. Then we have a plan. We'll bid on Hinata until he reaches his limit then bow out at the last second."

"But only if he doesn't run out of money trying to beat Lee," confirmed Shino.

As Sai watched Naruto smile happily at the thought of two cuties hopping to his beck and call, the artist wonder out loud, "It must be very challenging and confusing to juggle two women at once. Who could possibly pull that off?"

Naruto shrugged, "Ask Shika, he's been handling it just fine for almost a year now. Although, what are you gonna do when Temari gets here?"

Shikamaru sucked in on the towel and nearly choked to death. He tore the wet cloth off his face and shouted, "Temari is in the auction?" He jumped out of the pool and ran out the door.

Chouji sighed as he followed suit, "Poor guy forgot his clothes."

...

It was a couple days from the auction and people were pouring into the Land of Fire for the event. Not far from Konohakagure's borders, a group of Cloud shinobi and citizens walked steadily along the well traveled road. Most of the travelers were women, who were excited to be invited to another hidden village for the first time. In the middle of the group was their Raikage, Ei, who strode tall and proud like an ominous war tower. He was a man on a mission to prove that Kumo was not only a military might, but a very valuable ally in times of peace.

'And show that dirty old Onoki that no one stands in my way. Mei will be mine!' His eyes flashed with determination.

Dauri scouted ahead while Shee brought up the rear and both kept a steady look out for any threats. Not that the diversion wouldn't be welcomed. If any stupid thug even entertained a thought about attacking the Raikage and his entourage, the idiot would find himself pounded into paste in no time flat.

The Raikage's right hand man watched the kunoichi march readily along the road as she practically led the troop toward the Land of Fire, "Heh, someone's impatient to get to Konoha!"

Mabui chuckled with Dauri, "I'll say! Kauri-chan, you've got quite a spring in your step today."

Kauri looked over her shoulder at the others and answered, "Sure why not? I'm curious to see how much Konoha has rebuilt. Last time we were there, it was practically a giant hole in the ground. Not to mention, Samui and I saw a lot of cuties in their ranks and their shinobi kick ass somethin' fierce. Wouldn't it be wonderfully romantic if I meet a rich man there who would sweep me off my feet and declare his undying love for me!"

Omoi pursed his lips to move the lollipop stick to the other side of his mouth, "There you go again. You daydreaming impossible crap. It didn't happen last time and it won't happen now. No one's gonna wanna bid on your scary ass. Now as for me, I got real problems."

"Omoi, just cause you there and gonna be payin," Killer Bee reminded his student, "Don't mean you can afford ta' be picky. Y'all know what I'm sayin'."

Already lost in his imagination, Omoi patted his shoulder vest and checked the thickness of his wallet, "Ah there it is... but did I bring enough money? 'S okay, if I'm short, they might take a check. Uh oh, but what if all the honeys are so fly that I can't make up my mind? And what if they all fall for me and start fighting-"

Shee shook his shaggy blond hair as Omoi began to spaz, "Oh hell here it comes, somebody stop him before his head starts to spin."

Mabui closed her eyes and groaned, "Too late."

"What, what," Omoi's mind went off in a tangent as his eyes darted erratically, "What would happen if the girl I buy is all sweet in the beginning then she start trippin' over stuff like messing with the threads or cutting my hair..."

Darius tapped the Raikage's little brother on the shoulder, "Sorry to ask you, Bee, but he is your student."

"What if she begs me to marrying her, makes me spend all my dough, and then starts popping out babies like pez candy." One swipe across the back of Omoi's head from Bee sent the nin rocketing into the mud.

His sensei bent over Omoi and watched him spit a mouthful of dirt, "Boy, with a smart ass mouth like that, you be lucky to buy an ugly old bat."

With a huge bump on the noggin, Omoi quickly sat up and rubbed his chin in thought, "Weeell, the Hokage ain't that bad and it solves the baby problem." Killer Bee slapped a hand over his eyes and groaned with the others in embarrassment.

Shaking her head at that stupid teammate of theirs, Kauri turned her attention to the quiet blond to the side, "Samui, are you excited by the auction too?"

The blond kunoichi glanced briefly at her subordinate and replied in a icy indifference, "Raikage told me to go, so I'm going. That's all there is to it."

"You serious," asked Kauri as she gaped at the woman, "There's no one you're curious to see again? Not even the famous Copy-cat ninja, Hatake Kakashi?"

Samui shook her head and kept walking straight ahead, "No, not really."

"What about that hot Shiranui Genma? Last time he was pretty smitten witcha'," Kauri wiggled her eyebrows suggestively.

Once again, Samui showed not one stirring of emotion, neither revulsion nor anticipation, "If either one spends the money, then it's fine with me. But I have no one particular in mind."

Kauri frowned at how the other woman was so practical about the whole thing, "Dang, you're treating this like a job, not a visit for international goodwill and charity."

Samui gave a small sigh at her teammate's enthusiasm, "I haven't been told to go on leave. Have you been told to go on leave? No, it was set as a mission to Konohakagure to drum up funds for our village."

"Girl please," Kauri smirked knowingly and smoothed the kerchief wrapped over her deep red hair, "Kumo don't need the money. We need to fix our reps with the other villages. You and me need to show the other villages that Kumo can party! So you better cut loose and live a little. Find yourself a guy and go crazy, ya' know. Even if it's only for one date."

Samui remained unmotivated, "On a personal level, I don't do one night stands."

Kauri clucked her tongue and poked Samui in the arm, "I didn't say that. I said to have fun. Doesn't need to be any bumpin' and grinding."

In hopes of ending the uncomfortable conversation, Samui mumbled, "I'll think about it."

Kauri snorted, "No you won't."

The Raikage's secretary listened quietly to the other women as she strolled behind them. While Kauri's positive attitude was refreshing, Mabui had to agree with the blond, 'You're right to play cautiously on this trip, Samui-san. If I'm successful with the auction, this will be the surprise coup of your career and Konoha will be at a loss on how to stop it.' She turned her dark emerald eyes back to the road and ran through the Raikage's plan for Samui.

It started almost a month ago. None of the volunteers for the auction charity were in the right condition for this mission. So the Raikage had to issue an order that sent many single kunoichi to the Kumokagure medical center. Of the few women that fit the bill, only Samui stood out as the best kunoichi for the job. The doctor gave her an experimental injection of hormones and to Samui's credit, she didn't ask any questions. She only politely accepted the paper thin excuse that the Raikage and the head medic gave her.

'Now it's all a matter of finding the right man for her,' Mabui whistled low and crossed her fingers for luck.

...

"Achoo!" Kou rubbed the tip of his nose in embarrassment then returned his attention back to Tsunade, who was staring at him, "Forgive me, Hokage-sama. My allergies must be acting up."

Tsunade took the report from him and smiled slyly, "Or a cute girl was thinking about you. That's a good sign. Are you planning on being at the charity auction, Kou-san?"

The guy blushed slightly and nodded, "Hai, I'm really looking forward to it. I've even been saving up."

"So you have someone in mind? Come on, you can tell me," teased Tsunade as she rested her chin on her hands and fluttered her lashes at the normally formal Hyuuga.

He laughed and looked at the floor shyly, "I heard from my cousin Neji that his teammate had signed up. She's very beautiful and I always admired her skill and tenacity."

"You have a crush on Tenten," Tsunade exclaimed, "That's magnificent! I'll be in the back in the dressing rooms with the rest of the girls. Be sure to bring in plenty of money and I'll put in a good word with you."

He bowed before heading for the door, "Thank you, Hokage-sama. I will Hokage-sama!"

"That was so sweet," Tsunade gushed to herself, "This is what it feels like to be a matchmaker. I like it!"

A few minutes later, there was a knock at the Hokage's office door and Tsunade didn't even glance up from Kou's report, "Enter." She did look up when Nara Shikamaru walked inside. The young shadow master looked a bit nervous instead of his usual lackadaisical demeanor.

Tsunade sat the file down and watched one of Konoha's best strategists as he stood rim-rod straight before her,"Is there anything I can help you with, Shikamaru?"

"Have you found a master of ceremonies for the charity auction, Tsunade-sama?"

"Not yet," sighed Tsunade and waved a hand at the opened letters sitting in one corner of her desk, "We had a couple of professionals in mind, but when they heard it wasn't a paying position, they backed out. If you know anyone interested in volunteering-"

He cleared his throat and stated, "I would like to volunteer as master of ceremonies for the Bachelorette Auction."

Tsunade rapidly shook her head to clear the cobwebs then asked, "Sorry, for a minute there I thought I heard you volunteer to mc for the Auction."

"I did."

She leaned over her desk with both elbows and gasped in disbelief, "You, Nara Shikamaru, are volunteering to work?"

He bowed at the waist then straightened again, "Yes, do I get the job or not?"

Tsunade grinned and fell back in her chair in complete astonishment, "Sure, sure. I'm just surprised to find someone willing to do this for free at the last minute. This is unexpected, but marvelous!"

"I won't do it for free."

Now Tsunade felt on more familiar ground and smiled, "Go ahead and tell me your condition so that I may consider your application."

Shikamaru took a deep breath and spat out, "The Master of Ceremonies cannot make any bids on the participants."

Tsunade shrugged, "Well, I don't know about that. This auction is all rather new. We could bend the rules and make some excep-"

Shikamaru was quick to interrupt the Hokage, "I repeat! The Master of Ceremonies must be excluded from the auction and cannot make any bids whatsoever."

Tsunade smirked as she realized what was going on and pointed to the guilt-ridden Shikamaru, "I get it now! You heard that Temari would be arriving today... And don't you have that pretty little kunoichi from the Code Department who has been following you around like a love-sick puppy? Shiho-chan, right?"

Shika pealed his clammy hands from his sides and began to kneel, "It'll be annoying, but if you want me on my hands and knees."

"Don't bother dirtying your pants, Nara. I get enough complaints from your mother as is," said Tsunade as she waved a dismissing hand, "You are now the official master of ceremonies who is most explicitly not allowed to bid due to potential conflict of interest. Happy now?"

"Hai. Thank you, Tsunade-sama." Shikamaru positively radiated relief as he sauntered out the door.

Chuckling, the Hokage stood up from her chair and looked out on the view of downtown Konoha, "Their tough as nails Temari vs. our sharp as a pin Shiho. This will be the bitch fight of the ages that I intend not to miss." She opened the window and was about to jump out when there was another knock at the door.

"Damn," Tsunade stepped down from the sill and sat back at her seat, "Enter."

"Hokage-sama, Makino-san and his assistant, Takase, are here as you requested," Shizune opened the door wide to make room for a old man wearing blue-tinted spectacles and brown pageboy cap, followed by a man that was bogged down with books and binders. Tsunade assumed this was the assistant director Takase.

"Thank you, Shizune... Uh, Shizune," Tsunade gestured for the two men to have a seat then looked back at her personal assistant, "Could you head downtown and keep an on eye Shikamaru for me? I have a feeling he may need an intervention on his behalf this afternoon."

"Hai," The brunette bowed once then closed the door behind her.

"It is an honor to receive a summons by Konohakagure's Godaime," said Makino with a bright grin, "I never would have expected you of all people needing my services."

"Your skills as a movie director would be invaluable for this project, Makino-san. The Land of Snow movie was a massive hit and we could use your talent to help this event continue adding money to the orphanage funds. You have already heard about our Bachelorette Auction?"

The old man nodded, "Yes, I have. It sounds like you will be able to raise a lot of money for the orphanages."

Tsunade gave a forlorn sigh and put on her saddest smile, "We hope so. The generous donations won't mean much if we use most of it on operating expenses. There are some parts that we simply cannot negotiate. That is where I was hoping you and your wonderful crew can come in and help us out. We would like you to film the auction and the dates. Then we sell the show to the television station with the highest bid."

Makino lowered his head to gaze over his blue specs, "I am flattered you thought of me for this project, Hokage-sama. But like you said there are some expenses that cannot be negotiated."

"Naturally, you cannot to this for free. You and your crew will receive fifteen percent of the proceeds and the rest will be shared by all the shinobi villages."

"That does sound interesting, but..." Makino winced as he looked at his assistant, who was also wondering how to break it to the Hokage.

Tsunade waited for the man to finish, "But what?"

Makino circled his hands excitedly, "The auction would be fascinating indeed with all the emotion, suspense, and chemistry between the couples. It is the subsequent dates that might be problem."

"I don't see how?"

Takase jumped into the conversation, "Once they realize they'll be filmed and they know who they are dating, then the experiences will become scripted and all too predictable. It's only natural. They won't be able to help it. When people know they're being watched, their behavior changes and the attention grabbing drama will disappear."

Tsunade's shoulder slumped in disappointment, "Are you sure? And if so, what's wrong with that?"

Makino nodded with his assistant's explanation, "You want to sell this, then there needs to be the element of surprise and a proper story behind as many couples as possible. Otherwise, you might as well kiss your money goodbye."

"Are you suggesting we do more?"

The famous director tried to break it to the Hokage gently, "I'm suggesting that to keep the momentum we would need to follow the couples in their everyday lives. Quietly get interviews from their families or friends. Developing backgrounds and personalities helps the audience identify with their favorite people."

Tsunade winced and shook her head, "We are shinobi, Makino-san. I doubt very many will agree to such intrusion into their lives. Not to mention, we have whole clans that insist on their privacy even from their own neighbors."

Makino frowned and rubbed his chin in thought, "Ah, I see. That did not occur to me."

"There might be another way to drum up more funds," said the assistant, "You could approach as many businesses and get them to 'Donate' money or services in exchange for screen time."

"Like a florist can offer corsages or bouquets if they get a shot advertising their shop," added Makino.

"Or a restaurant could offer free meals for the dates," continued the assistant, "If they're featured prominently in the show."

"I'm liking this," said Tsunade excitedly as she reached for a pen and notepad to write the ideas down, "But I still have reservations about intruding in my shinobi's lives."

"Are there civilians involved? Those who wouldn't mind a little limelight?" Makino crossed his fingers and prayed she would buy his pitch.

She nodded while writing the names of businesses with services the auction could use, "Several."

"Then we can concentrate more on them," said Makino with a flourish of one hand, "That should give us plenty of footage to work with!"

Takase leaned toward his boss and whispered, "For real, sir?"

Makino shushed his assistant from the corner of his mouth, "We'll talk about it later."

Tsunade heard their whispers quite clearly, but she played dumb and continued to jot down ideas on her notepad, "So do we have an agreement for your services?"

"Yes you do, Hokage-sama," Makino and his assistant stood up to bow, "We will begin filming as soon as we sign the paperwork."

"Good! I'll have Shizune send you the contract as soon as she done breaking up a cat fight between a Sand and Leaf kunoichi over one of our young men."

Makino blinked, "Did you say 'Cat fight'?" There was a mischievous twinkle in his eye that Tsunade didn't miss. He sat back down on his chair and smiled, "We're not in a rush today. Do you mind if I wait here while my assistant goes back to the hotel and get our equipment ready?"

"Not at all," said Tsunade with an equally devious smile, "And if he should catch anything interesting on the street leading to the Main Gate, he has the Hokage's permission to film it."

"Right!" Takase ran at top speed out the office and down the spiral stairs.


	5. Chapter 5

I do not own Naruto nor make any profit from it

Chapter Five

Shizune ran through the street leading to the main gate and waved at two familiar women as she hurried along, "Afternoon, Kurenai and Hinata-chan. Can't stop to chat. Running errand for Tsunade-sama. Talk later."

"See you later then, Shizune-chan," Kurenai called out to the running kunoichi then turned her attention back to her former student, who stood near by shuffling her feet back and forth, "Now, back to the matter at hand. I know your father can be intimidating, Hinata, but have you discuss the auction with him yet?"

Hinata gulped at how her sensei pressed for details with that no-nonsense voice of hers. Blushing from top to bottom, Hinata stammered weakly, "A-a-a lot of things have come up. I am so sorry, Kurenai-sensei. Uh, but I volunteered to help at the hospital and I should be going. Right now. So sorry. Good-bye!"

Before Kurenai could stop her, Hinata ran down the street and turned a corner leading in the opposite direction of the hospital. The brunette sighed and tapped a foot on the ground. Kurenai had sent a letter a week earlier, asking for Hiashi's permission that his first-born daughter would join the bachelorette auction. She didn't know why it was taking so long to get a response from the Hyuuga clan. Any kind would do, a "Yes" or "No", but not a word for days. Kurenai tracked down the genin that delivered the letter and he said that the letter had been handed straight to the Hyuuga leader. Apparently going through the proper channels and waiting for approval wasn't getting anywhere. It was time to face this problem directly. Kurenai headed out of downtown and for the opulent residence district where the powerful clans of Konohakagure had rebuilt their homes.

Kurenai sat in the middle of the wide room where the Hyuuga servant had directed her and she waited for nearly a quarter of an hour. She looked around the room, out the window, then double-checked her watch, "This is ridiculous."

'What the hell is his problem? Hinata is already signed up and the big night is tomorrow. There couldn't be anything objectionable for him,' She sat there with the patience of a rock, 'Maybe that snooty elitist can't face the reality of Hinata-chan dating. No matter what, I'm not going anywhere until I get Hinata on that stage.' Kurenai heard the sound of footsteps thumping towards her position then a shadow stopped in front of the door. The shadow slid the door open and Hiashi, the stern and cold leader of the Hyuuga clan, stepped inside the room.

"My apologies for the wait, Sarutobi-san. I know you're here about Hinata being in the Charity Auction," He slowly walked to the front, looked down at the still seated Kurenai with his near white pupils, and growled through clenched teeth, "Because of Uzumaki's idiotic decision on handling his indecision, this auction has been the absolute bane of my existence for the past two weeks!"

Kurenai opened her mouth to protest, but was cut off by Hiashi ranting about his elder daughter, "There has been little rest for her since she found out about this debacle. She wants to go. She doesn't want to go. She wants Naruto. She doesn't want Naruto. She is either madly in love with the boy or gone mad with jealousy. Hinata is second guessing herself and cannot make a firm decision in anything including what to eat for breakfast. It's as if she regressed ten years!"

"Oh," Kurenai reared back in surprise. It never occurred to her that Hinata herself would be the source of the Hyuuga's lack of response. "So you have no problem with Hinata dating?"

With pearl eyes wide, Hiashi threw his hands up in frustration, "None whatsoever! She should be dating several boys, but to Hinata no one will ever be as perfect as Naruto. I wish I could shake some sense into her."

Kurenai sighed and nodded with the exasperated father, "Problem is, the boy also wants to date his teammate, Sakura. So he's been stalling for some time now."

"Stalling? Ha! Anyone with half a brain can see he's stringing Hinata along in hopes that jealousy will help him catch the other girl," Hiashi folded both arms and drummed fingers on one arm, "I don''t like to watch my daughter make a fool of herself. She's come too far for that."

Kurenai got up from the floor and stood shoulder to shoulder with Hiashi, "Then this charity auction couldn't have come at a better time. We need to work together and get Hinata at that auction whether she wants to or not."

"We may have to do more than that," said Hiashi as he led her out the room and into the garden, "My nephew, Neji, informed me that Naruto intends to buy both girls."

The brunette used one hand to cover a gasp then leaned in with a rapid whisper, "Can he do that?"

Hiashi shook his head sadly, "There's nothing in the rules against it, but Neji heard that Rock Lee has saved a lot of money that date with Sakura. Naruto will have to be ready pay a lot for her."

Kurenai began pacing the room, trying to picture in her head of what the future might bring, "That may be Sakura's salvation or hell. But we may need a more solid solution than Lee to make sure Naruto doesn't win Hinata and since he saved the village and Ichiraku stopped charging him, there's no telling how much money the boy may have in his piggy bank. "

Hiashi frowned and crossed his arms, "Good point. I lost a fortune investing in that restaurant. Do you have any suggestions?"

Kurenai smiled as a plan began to form in her mind, "Maybe, but we will have to resort to more drastic measures."

…..

The company from Sunakagure wandered through the gates around noon and they headed for the New Konoha Hotel where the Bachelorette Auction was to be held. Gaara went ahead to the to check in while Kankuro and Temari wandered around. They walked out the modest lobby and came a large garden where last minute adjustments were being done for the event. At one end of the garden was a stage with a catwalk stretching down the middle and a curtained corridor led back into the hotel where a hall of rooms were to be used for changing. Staff members were pinning streamers and decorations around the area, while a DJ was off the the side setting up his equipment.

"Looks like the hotel has everything in order," said Gaara as he walked behind his siblings, "But the least they could have done was offer some sort of discount for participants."

"Grumble, grumble, grumble. That's all you've done the entire way over here. Don't worry about your pocket book, little brother. The girls and I will bring in more than enough to cover the expenses." Temari tossed Kankuro her pack and headed for the downtown streets, "If you'll excuse me, I'm gonna get some food. I'm starving."

"I would rather you stay here and have lunch with your Kazekage," said Gaara in a last ditch effort to keep his sister from chasing down Nara Shikamaru.

"Hmmm let me think. NO!" Then she flashed away, leaving behind two irritated brothers in the hotel lobby.

"And there she goes. Off to find that lazy two-timing boyfriend of hers," grumbled Kankuro then he looked over at Gaara, the supposed all powerful and greatly feared Kazekage, "What the hell happened? You said that you would handle it. That you could manipulate the council."

Gaara pressed his lips tightly then grumbled, "I underestimated those greedy old farts. Not to worry, I came up with a plan on the way over here. When I'm done no one, not even Shikamaru, will dare bid on our sister." A flurry of activity from the front desk alerted the Sabaku brothers that another high-ranking guest was arriving. The Mizukage and her entourage came through the hotel entrance and waited as the manager made a huge fuss over the gorgeous redhead with a killer kiss.

"Welcome to our humble hotel, most honorable Kazekage-sama," Kankuro jealously mimicked the manager's whiny voice, "Please ring the desk for anything you like, whenever you like, Kazekage-sama. Your brother is free to indulge in the bar as much as he wants, Kazekage-sama." He and his brother watched in their little corner as the staff fell over themselves to impress the Ame group. "I remember when we used to get the five star treatment from these guys. Now we'd be lucky to get any complimentary robes. I almost had a full set too. One for every day of the week."

There was an awkward silence from Gaara as he closed his eyes and prayed for self-control, "Kankuro, those robes are not complimentary. They were never complimentary." He opened his eerie aquamarine eyes and growled through clenched teeth, "I wondered why the bills seemed astronomical each time we stayed here. Do you realize how much they charge for stolen property?"

The puppeteer glanced at his wrist and exclaimed, "Wow, look at the time! Is it lunch already? I'll go grab some grub, shall I?" And a puff of smoke later, Gaara found himself alone... again. He was getting real tired of that.

Temari wandered around the tall buildings of Konoha. She stopped for a minute to take in a deep breath. There was a heavy smell of fresh paint and sawdust from all the work still being done years later. It reminded her of how Sunakagure got back on it's feet after that Akatsuki bastard, Deidara, managed wreak havoc on their home. Thanks to Gaara's quick thinking, the damage to Suna wasn't nearly as bad as what Pein had done to Konoha. But the Leaf didn't waste anytime getting back on their feet. Their will of fire was certainly resilient. As she passed people along the street, Temari nodded an acknowledgment of respect to each shinobi sporting a leaf on their headband.

'The men in Konoha are an impressive lot. A girl has to be careful. It's so easy to lose your heart to them,' Temari thought as she peered between passing pedestrians then caught a view of her favorite tea shop. She smiled when she recognized a familiar figure with dark hair gathered high and slouched posture... sitting next to a blushing blond. Temari's smile disappeared in a hurry. 'Maybe a little too easy.'

Not sure if she was hallucinating or not, Temari gaped at the sight of a nerdy kunoichi with thick glasses and white blond hair sticking every which way like a rumbled haystack. The girl slipped a hand around his arm, blushed a deeper red, and scooted her bottom closer to Shikamaru. Temari could see in slow motion as the other girl pursed her lips and started stretching to meet Shikamaru's cheek. Reacting on instinct, Temari swung out a warning finger and shouted, "HOLD IT RIGHT THERE, FOUR EYES!"

Shikamaru cringed to hear the shout from a very troublesome Sand kunoichi, "Here already, huh?" At a snail's pace, he got up from the bench and looked for the top of Temari's giant fan sliding through the crowd like a metallic shark fin until she emerged in front of him, furious and ready to slice some heads off. He coughed then thumb at his lunch companion, "Afternoon Temari, welcome back to Konoha. This is Shiho. Shiho, this is Sabaku Temari."

Shiho stood up and gave Temari a tight, but polite smile, "I know very well who she is."

"And I don't give a flying fuck who you are," Temari stepped closer to Shiho and put both hands on her hips, "But I do care what you've been doing with my boyfriend?"

"None of your business, Sabaku since he's not yours, at least not anymore. You broke up, remember?"

Temari's jaw dropped and she pinned Shikamaru with a glare, "Is that what he's been telling everyone?"

"I don't make it a point to inform the public about my dating life," mumbled Shikamaru as his eyes were already scoping for the best means of escape.

Temari turned back to Shiho, "FYI, it was a short break and then he came to Sunakagure, crawling on his knees, and begging me to take him back."

"And then you broke it off when he left for Konoha," Shiho adjusted her glasses out of habit and missed the flabbergasted look Temari gave Shikamaru, "Same old cycle you two go through every year. It's become obvious that neither one of you are serious. I'm giving him the chance of having a normal relationship that you are incapable of providing for him."

As the two kunoichi glared each other in the middle of the street, Shikamaru looked left then right before he slipped into the shadows, away from the two scary women The last he needed was getting his own head got ripped off by accident in their cat fight.

"Look there's no point in wallowing in denial. He is no longer yours and it's time to move on," Shiho as she glanced at her wristwatch and tapped the glass face, "Shouldn't you be getting ready for the Auction? Less than twenty hours to get a man of your own. Tick, tock, tick tock. Some of us aren't getting any younger."

Temari was already on the verge of losing her temper and this brazen hussy was about to get her ass kicked, "And if some of us don't learn manners, they'll find out why we Sabaku are in the Bingo Books. At least I am in the auction. It'd be a long shot if anyone was interested in a weak geek like you."

"As a matter of fact, I am in the auction and this geek can bring in more money than you ever could," countered Shiho and held her chin up proudly, "There are men out there who appreciate intellect and class more than how many ways you could kill them. Like my Shika."

Furious that this beanpole dared to challenger her, Temari turned to see Shikamaru trying to hide behind a curious pedestrian then grabbed him by the arm, pulling him back into the fray, "Shikamaru, tell us. Which girl do you plan to bid on? Me or four eyes."

Shikamaru stuck his hands into his pants pockets, kept his head down, and hoped his excuse worked, "Neither, as host of the charity auction, I am ineligible to make a bid on anyone."

Taken back by the news, Shiho stared at him through her large lenses like an owl and whined, "Really, it's in the rules? But you never said anything. Would it be too late for me to bow out of the auction?"

Temari was surprised as well, "I don't see why you can't make any bids." Then she narrowed her dark teal eyes in suspicion, "This reeks of bullshit to me."

"You heard the man," said Shiho as she faced down at her rival and waved one hand to shoo the Sand kunoichi away, "Sorry you came all this way to have some old geezer drool over you. Maybe next time you should set your sights on someone your own age, cradle robber."

Temari's eyes popped open and she reached behind for the giant fan strapped to her back, "Say that again and I cut you to shreds!" And that was Shikamaru's cue to flicker away to a safe distance.

Shiho held her ground and folded her hands for a defensive jutsu, "Cradle-"

"SSST-OOOP!"

Shizune panted as she burst out of the large crowd that gathered to watch the show. She drooped to catch her breath then straightened to hold a hand at the surprised kunoichi, "Stop! This type of behavior will not be tolerated. You two should be ashamed. Think about the reputations of your villages you must uphold. Shiho, lunch break is over. Return to the cipher department and Sabaku-san, I suggest you go to the hotel. Stay away from each other if you have to. Any senseless fighting will be met with a night in an ANBU cell."

"I'll be happy make sure Sakubu-san reaches her hotel safely," said a calm voice came from behind the girls and everyone saw Chouji, Shikamaru's best friend step forward. He smiled gently at the fuming Temari and laid a firm hand on her shoulder. The cheerful red swirls on his cheeks belied the ability for Chouji to enforce his words. Temari took a deep breath and did her best to swallow her anger... for the time being. The two girls glared at each other with promised pain in the future then meandered away in opposite directions.

Shizune nodded her thanks to Chouji then started walking back to the Hokage Tower after Shiho, 'These girls are crazy to fight over a guy in public like that. If this is what we have to look forward to keeping the peace in the dressing rooms will be like herding cats.' She passed by a guy balancing a camera on his shoulder, filming the fuming kunoichi as they stalked into the crowd, and grinning like a mad idiot. It was the same assistant she saw only a little while ago with the famous director, Makino.

"Takase? Nah, Tsunade-sama wouldn't do that, would she?" Shizune imagined her superior rubbing her hands greedily and she groaned to herself, "Oh yes, she would."

…..

As Chouji escorted Temari back to the hotel, he watched the sand kunoichi from the corner of his eye in case she gave in to her anger and decided to hunt down Shikamaru. She ignored his scrutiny and stared hard at the well traveled road under her feet. Sighing inwardly, Chouji really hated this game that he found himself caught in the middle.

For years Shika and Temari went back and forth. Missions would bring them together then at the end they would go on a break. Nara would romance one girl after another only to drop them when word that Temari wanted to try again. Both villages agreed that Shikamaru and Temari made one hell of a power couple. But it was frustrating to watch those two go through such drama with neither willing to bend their back for the other. Chouji could see the end coming while most were certain they were a sure bet. It was still a very sad thing to witness. Temari was the kind of kunoichi most shinobi would be proud to call their wife. Strong, brilliant, and to top it off gorgeous. She turned heads and knew it. Like all the best kunoichi, she never hesitated to use her feminine wiles as another tool in her arsenal. And now she was completely free and single. Shikamaru was no longer going to be a shadow attached to her heart.

Chouji gulped as forbidden thoughts emerged and he had an irresistible craving to drown the conflicting emotions bubbling inside him with a big bag of BBQ chips. His inner struggles were interrupted by Temari's voice.

"I noticed the coward turned tail as soon as the perfect distraction showed up."

Chouji looked back at Temari, to see her sad demeanor replaced with steely resignation. He answered truthfully, "Shikamaru knew the situation was a lost cause."

"And ever the gentleman, you volunteered to clean up his mess," She stopped walking and closed her eyes, "I'm sorry. That last remark was uncalled for. I should aim for the target, not the medic binding my wounds."

Chouji shrugged and chuckled at her attempt to insult him only to fall short, "You're not too far off. He's my best friend and some habits are hard to break I suppose." He pointed ahead to remind her they still needed to find the Konoha Hotel.

They soon reached the front doors of the hotel and he said, "I'm sure you can handle the rest of the way by yourself." Chouji turned to look her in the eye, "Seriously though Temari, are you going to be okay?"

She tried to put on a brave grin for him, "We've had a lot of practice breaking up with each other. I'll be alright. I'm gonna get over him but," She paused to find the safest way to explain her tumultuous feelings without bursting the dam.

He gathered her in his arms and gave Temari the comforting hug she desperately needed, but didn't know how to ask for, "Not right now. I know." He whispered in her ear, "If it's any consolation to you, Shikamaru knows exactly what he's losing and he's been dreading the day when it truly ended." Realizing that he may be overstepping his boundaries, Chouji took an unsteady step back and he did a quick bow farewell. He walked down the street at a steady pace, but his heart was beating far too fast and inside Chouji's head, his insecurities berated him for indulging such rash actions.

When Chouji let go of her, Temari felt the loss of his warmth and comforting pressure. She liked the way he engulfed her with soothing care and wondered if she could get it back again. She watched him retreat into the crowds with wonderment written all over her face. 'It was just a kind gesture to comfort a friend. That's all,' She thought while reassuring herself. Temari turned to go inside the hotel lobby and wrapped both arms around her middle, 'Then why do I have butterflies?' She slid open the door to the suite shared by the Sabaku family and walked in on Gaara giving Kankuro a dressing down.

No, not that!

Gaara stood before Kankuro who sat on the floor with his head hanging forward. "And furthermore, if I see one more bill receipt with my name scribbled on it in your handwriting, you'll be assigned to the furthest outpost on the edge of Wind and Rain for a year. The title of Kazekage is not a credit card for you to brandish around for your personal benefit."

Temari meandered over to the kitchenette table that had a full spread of take-out, but was left unattended. "What's going on here?"

"I go get lunch and this the thanks I get," wailed Kankuro, pointing to his little brother, "Gaara is putting me in the poor house."

Gaara rolled his eyes and returned to the table for food, "Don't be such a big baby. Your room is paid for and any meals with me will be covered. However, the shopping sprees and handing me random bills are at an end."

"So looks like you'll be dateless next week," Temari sat down at the table and proceeded to fill her plate, "You know they're right when misery loves company. I feel much better."

Curious about his sister's dark mood, Kankuro joined his siblings at the table and sat next to Temari, "Misery? Better? Something happen with your dear Shika-kun?"

With noodles spilling from her lips, a growling Temari glared at her little brother then continued eating. The two young men knew all too well that in Temari-speak that was a polite, "Fuck off, before I slice you in half."

"Okay!" Kankuro smiled brightly and clapped his hands together, "It's never a proper Sabaku meal without mental torture and death threats. Itadakimasu!"

...

From a circle booth on the far left side of a crowded dance floor, Ino and Tenten waved to Sakura, Shiho and Hinata as they walked into the karaoke bar. "It's a good thing we came early," said Ino as the other three sat down after getting their sodas, "This place is packed to the rafters. There's a ton of kunoichi from all the other villages in here."

Sakura stretched in her seat and waved at the group of Suna shinobi, "Oh, I think I see Matsuri and Mikoshi from Sand over in the other corner. Hi!"

Tenten pulled Sakura back in her seat and pointed to the table one over from them. There was Tsunade, Terumii Mei the Mizukage, and the Tsukikage's granddaughter, Kurotsuchi, talking and sharing a few drinks of sake together, "Damn, I would give up my entire morning star collection to sit in on that powerhouse pow-wow."

Shiho looked around room and noticed a disturbing pattern different from the other nights, "No one's really mingling tonight. It's Ladies' Night and the place is teeming with single women, especially women from out of town. What are all these guys doing just sitting around and staring?"

"They're window shopping," said Ino with a sly smile, "And saving their ryo until the auction tomorrow night. No need to spend the money tonight when they'll need every bit to get the girl of their dreams."

Sakura frowned, "It's disgusting how they're looking over the women as if the auction was their own personal meat market. And speaking of despicable neanderthal behavior," The pink-haired kunoichi leaned over the table to get a better view of the Hinata, "I am so sorry for Naruto's behavior, Hina-chan. Sometimes he talks without thinking his plans through. Just so you know, I knocked him over the head for you."

"N-no need to apologize, Sakura-san," reassured Hinata, "You can't control him as much as I can't control Kiba. They're both too rash for their own good."

Ino stirred the little umbrella in her soda, "Yeah, but even Kiba knows there are some lines you don't cross. I'm surprised that Kiba didn't kill Naruto right then and there. He's always been very protective of you, Hinata."

"True," conceded Sakura, "He may be a uncouth brute, but he is fiercely loyal to the end. Unlike some men."

A hush fell over the table and Shiho blushed even when no one looked her way. None of the others were accusing her, but it was safe to assume everyone heard about the tiff between her and Temari.

"It's not your fault, Shiho-chan. I've known him since we were in diapers." said Ino then she took a long sip from her soda, "Shikamaru has always been sneaky with all the girls he's dated. We assumed the same things as you and hoped he would settle down with a nice girl. At this rate, the guy is going to end up a confirmed bachelor... kind of like Kakashi-sensei."

Sakura pointed to across the floor, "There's Kakashi now, but what's he doing here? He's got a girlfriend waiting for him at home," She noticed light from the bar doors opening and a woman sauntered through, "Oh never mind, there she is. They're probably meeting up for a date."

The tall slender woman with long chestnut brown hair wandered through the crowd, slipped behind Kakashi, then wrapped her arms around his waist. He turned to greet her and was met with a long deep kiss. When she broke the kiss, she nuzzled his nose and whispered something in his ear.

Kakashi paused for barely a second before smiling and saying something back.

His girlfriend narrowed her eyes, pushed him away and yelled loud enough to be heard by everyone, "You were going to call me by her name again, weren't you?" Kakashi didn't say anything, neither denying or confirming her suspicion. Angry and hurt, she swung her hand out and slapped him across the face.

Tenten nodded in approval at the solid sound of the woman's palm hitting Kakashi's cheek, "I can see how the mask come in handy. Dulls the sting and hides the hand-print."

Everyone watched as the ex-girlfriend walked out the bar. Then woman shouted from the door, "And my name is not Kurenai!"

Once the woman was gone, Kakashi sighed and returned to his bar stool. The bartender poured him another drink, "On the house, buddy."

Sakura watched the man lift the glass and stare at the clear liquid as it sloshed around, "Poor Kaka-senpai. It's been like this for years. All these women fall over themselves then not long after they catch him, they break up."

"Pining for the one woman he believes is out of his reach," echoed Ino and clasped her hands together dramatically, "That's so tragic."

Tenten simply shrugged, completely unsurprised by this couple outcome, "Story of Kakashi's life."

"Do you think he'll be at the auction," wondered Shiho.

"If not before, he will now. I'm going to go talk to him." Sakura gestured for Ino and Tenten to move from the booth so she could scoot out.

Sitting on the far side of the girls' booth, Hinata kept her eyes downward and continued sipping her soda-pop through the straw. How she wished it was something stronger than fizzy strawberry cola. Maybe whatever Kakashi happened to be knocking back at an increased rate.

Shiho noticed the somber reaction from the Hyuuga and whispered to her, "Admittedly, drowning my sorrows in soda wasn't what was I expecting to do tonight either."

Hinata looked up from her soda and smiled politely, "I suppose no one can always get what they want... no matter how badly you wants it. Right, Shiho-san? I'm sorry. Our special night is supposed to be fun and I am not doing much to help. It's time that I returned home. Thank you for inviting me, girls." And with that Hinata left their table and waved at Sakura before leaving the karaoke bar.

Shiho sat her cup down and scooted out the booth, "I better go too. A good night's rest might add some clarity to our problems. I'll see you girls tomorrow."

"Don't you dare drop out of the auction, Shiho-chan," Ino called after her, "We need you and I expect to see you at the hotel tomorrow."

Waving goodbye, Shiho gave them a sad smile, but didn't answer back because she still didn't know what she was going to do. There was still a chance that she could win the man of her dreams or be pushed to the wayside for a more 'desirable' woman. Shiho rarely put herself in a risky situation, but somehow she was caught smack dab in the middle of a very dangerous love triangle. This was a conundrum that would need a proper night's rest to solve.

"You too," asked Sakura as she waved farewell to the morose blond kunoichi, "Alright, have a good night, Shiho-chan."

Now fully annoyed that friends were dropping like flies to their depressions, Sakura navigated through the crowded dance floor to the bar and tapped Kakashi on the shoulder to get his attention.

He turned enough to give a Sakura a half-hearted smile from underneath his mask, "Not to worry, Sakura. I'll be fine."

"Pfft," The young woman shrugged a shoulder, "Of course you'll be fine. I've seen you go down this road so many times, I might as well buy a stopwatch for your love life."

Kakashi winced then signaled at the bartender for some more sake, "That's a bit harsh, Sakura-chan. I'm not that bad."

"Oh no?" She poked him in the arm then started counting along her fingers, "Let's see, there was Yurika, Okyou, Susuki, Kohada, Hanare... Although we shouldn't count her since you two never got to first base. Then there was Ibara, Kaori, Otoha and those are the ones that I know about. Now I just witnessed the infamous Hatake Kakashi let a woman, a mere civilian, get a hit in without using any self-defense. You didn't even try to dodge!"

Head hanging lower with each name thrown at him, Kakashi wallowed in self-pity and swallowed down more sake, "I thought I was being a gentleman. Didn't think my reputation as a shinobi was on the line."

Peering one green eye on him, Sakura crossed her arms, "Do you want to know what I think?"

"Not really," mumbled Kakashi.

Sakura leaned on the bar and continued, "Too bad. You wanted your girlfriend to break up with you. So you 'Accidentally' called her by another woman's name one too many times. You may be getting old, my dear sensei, but you're not senile yet."

"Aren't you supposed to be comforting me in my time of emotional need?" The man stared at the mirror before him and wished he could bury himself into the reflective glass, never to return.

She sneered and gave him a hearty pat on the back, "Been there before, this time I'm here to light a fire under you. The charity auction is tomorrow night. I suggest you scrape together whatever is left in your wallet and take the chance you really want." Then Sakura left Kakashi at the bar with plenty to ponder.

...


	6. Chapter 6

I do not own Naruto nor make any profit from it

Chapter Six

And finally, it was the night of Konohakagure's First Annual Most Eligible Bachelorette Auction. A large crowd consisting mostly of men gathered in the Konoha Hotel garden, eager to start the event. They milled around tables and chairs arranged in clusters, occasionally picking up a drink from the bar inside the hotel lobby. What was usually a dance floor was now surrounding the catwalk to offer an unparallelled view for the anxious bidders. It was only a matter of time before the stage would light up, indicating that the highly anticipated auction was about to begin. The hotel had the refreshment tables filled with food trays, punch bowls, and waiters wandering with trays to pour sake for their honored guests. In one corner, Ei the Raikage glared daggers from his table and from the opposite end of the garden sat Onoki, The Tsukikage, who twisted his white mustache with one hand and grinned maliciously at his rival.

The Kazekage entered the garden then staked out spot in front of the stage, before looking around. 'Kankuro left the room only a half hour ago. Where did he wander off to?' His answer came when Kankuro came winding his way through the crowd while carrying two plates full of food on one arm.

Gaara watched Kankuro balance the plates expertly and muttered, "You're in a suspiciously good mood again."

"That I am! I spent all last night thinking of strategy to handle my temporary financial strain. I'm down to my last few ryo, but since the big dinner date is taken care of," Kankuro handed Gaara a plate of food, "The only thing I have to cover is the girl. So every auction, I'm bidding one ryu. There's so many women here, odds are I've gotta come up lucky sometime!"

Gaara picked up a tiny rice ball decorated with a Konoha leaf design, "Odds are even better that you'll find yourself alone next week." He popped the rice ball into his mouth and it opened with delicious sweet bean paste. Not bad, just not to his usual taste.

Kankuro was already filling his mouth with the same h'orderves and he mumbled with a full mouth, "You never know. Stranger things have happened. Are you planning on bidding on Matsuri? She still has a crush on you."

"No," Gaara handed his plate back to Kankuro, "I'm not here for my enjoyment remember." He noticed a couple waiters that entered the garden with trays full of numbered signs for the bidders.

Kankuro shrugged and took the plate, "More for me then. Anyways, poor girl will be disappointed. She's your favorite student after all and you're not even going to pity bid on her."

"No sense giving her any illusions," Gaara raised a hand to get the waiter's attention who rushed to hand the Kazekage and his brother their auction signs.

Picking a random number, Kankuro shook his head at his little brother unschooled in the ways of wooing the fairer sex, "Harsh. Speaking of illusions. When are you going to explain your strategy to me?"

Gaara tucked his sign under one arm and held his ground, "You'll know it when you see it."

"Damn, you're stubborn. It's easier pulling teeth than info from you." He unhitched the scroll from his back and activated the summoning jutsu. With a puff of smoke, Black Ant and Crow plopped onto the floor, their hinges clacking with every move of Kankuro's chakra strings.

Gaara waved his hand to clear some of the smoke, "What are you doing?"

"Restocking the snack pantry. I can save a ton of money by not eating out. If you'll excuse me, there are tables full of free food with my name on it." Whistling a happy tune, the puppeteer opened up Crow's arms and Black Ant's hallow body then they veered straight for the catering.

From the corner of his eye, Gaara watched his brother slip through the tables, pinching unattended food left and right then stashing them into his puppets. 'Note to self, hire more lawyers.' Then Gaara felt someone tumble onto his sand gourd. He turned around to see Rock Lee lying on the floor and Guy fumbling to pick up his student.

When he heard someone clear his throat, Guy looked up then gave Gaara a wide smile, "Oh excuse us, Kazekage-sama. This is some party, huh?"

When he should have been asleep, Lee had a sudden burst of energy and in split second, he was upright, waving his arms like mad, "I'm here. I'm here. I made it to the auction alive!" Then Lee dropped into Guy's ready arms like a puddle of goo.

Gaara warily eyed Lee as he limped in Guy's arms, "Has he been hitting the sauce again?"

"No no no, nothing like that Kazekage-sama," A nervous bead of sweat formed on his forehead as Guy began dragging his student into more friendly territory, "He's just excited about winning a date tonight. Nothing to worry about. Nothing at all."

Gaara narrowed his jade eyes as Lee's file about his alcohol 'weakness' stood out in big red kanji, "Hmmm... Well if he does start acting up, I will not hesitate to use my Sand Burial until the ANBU arrive."

Guy laughed again and gave Gaara a thumbs up, "I understand, Kazekage-sama. Thank you for being so generous. Enjoy your evening."

…..

Akamaru was lying comfortably in the ground when he picked up the scent of two familiar people, but one of them was not quite right. He lifted his head from his paws and nudged his master.

Kiba turned to check what was bother Akamaru when his nose twitched with a weird scent, "Guy-sensei?"

"Ah hello, Aburame. Inuzuka and Akamaru! So good to see you. You wouldn't mind holding him while I find a chair. Thank you." Guy tossed Lee into Kiba, who barely had time to catch him. Shino leaned in to take a sniff for any whiff of alcohol, only to rear backwards in a hurry.

Kiba also scrunched his nose in disgust and growled, "I don't smell any booze on him either, but DAMN what is that stink on him?" Akamaru whined slightly then growled a soft grumble.

"You sure?" asked Kiba as he tried to turn his head away from Lee's breath, "Akamaru says that Lee smell sick."

Guy came back with a couple fold out chairs and sat Lee in one while positioning his feet on the second, "Whew, that worked. So how are you two doing? Looking forward to a date with a nice girl?"

Sticking hands in his jacket, Kiba grinned and barked out a laugh, "Hell no! We're here just so Ino doesn't land us with a guilt trip." Shino merely shrugged, not entirely sure if he could trust Guy to keep his overactive mouth shut.

Kiba sensed Shino's unease and quickly changed the subject by peering at Lee then he poked the inert guy in the shoulder to wake him up, "Hey Guy-sensei, what happened to him?" He dared to lean in with a sniff and pulled back to cover his nose. "Whew!"

"Ooooh," Guy clutched a defiant fist and tears filled his eyes to recount his favorite student's struggles, "In his valiant effort to accumulate enough money to claim the beautiful young cherry blossom, our dear Lee worked himself to the bone, day after hard-working day, saving every little bit of coin, cutting every corner, and for the past three days, foregoing his usual daily necessities-

Shino growled from the darkness of his hood, "Get on with it."

"And food!"

"Hang on," Kiba's voice squawked from pinching his nose shut, "Are you saying that Lee hasn't bathed or eaten a decent meal in three days."

A wobbling Lee raised his head and pointed to the sky, "Any price is worth the effort for true love! And I shall proclaim my love for the amazing Sakura from the highest point of the Hokage monument so that all five shinobi nations will know."

"That's great, Lee," said Kiba as he and Shino slowly backpedaled upwind of Lee, "Really great. As long as you proclaim your love from over there... waaay over there!"

…..

On the other side of the garden, Kakashi held his auction number in his hand and felt like a total fool standing among all these other suitors. 'What am I doing here? I just got out of a relationship. If I really wanted a date, it wouldn't be too hard for me. Why the hell am I hanging around in this barely disguised dating service?" Kakashi perused the program flier with the names of all the women up for auction.

'There she is," Kakashi's visible eye stopped at the name of Sarutobi Kurenai and wondered aloud, "Will this work or am I setting myself up for disaster? I wish the heavens could give me some sort of sign."

"OI KAKASHI-SENSEI!"

'Not what I meant,' Kakashi turned to see Naruto walking around tables and chairs, waving to people as he passed by them. He picked up an auction sign as he passed by one waiter then lifted a pineapple drink with a straw and an umbrella sticking out the top from another waiter.

"Glad you could make it, sensei," said Naruto as he clapped a hand on Kakashi's back, "Finally screwed up the courage to take Kurenai-sensei on a date?"

Kakashi smiled under his mask, but his voice had a slight edge of irritation, "How did you know about Kurenai?"

"Ah when one is in sage mode, you see all," Naruto whispered and wiggled his fingers in the air, "You know all."

"Or when Sakura happened to mention it to us earlier today," said a voice from a sculpted bush standing behind them.

Pulling a hissy fit, Naruto waved his arms and nearly burst into tears, "AW, Sai! Did you have to ruin the moment? I almost had him."

"No you didn't," Sai walked out from behind the tall ficus to greet his team captain, "Good evening, Kakashi. This auction has drawn quite a large crowd. The orphanages are lucky to have so many benefactors."

Naruto blew a raspberry and rubbed a finger under his nose, "Bah! Forget the orphans. Where's the women? I plan on have two hot babes swinging on my arms." He dug into his pants pocket and took out a thick clip of cash, "See I got my money. Now where's my honeys -dattebayo?"

"Patience is a virtue," reminded Kakashi, "But this is you we're talking about. Are you ready for the auction too, Sai?"

Sai held up his pouch and looked into it, "In truth, I don't have much money as I would like. But that can change easily. I have several markers that need to be called in. For starters, Naruto!"

"Yeah?"

Sai directed his gaze to the cash in his teammate's hand, "If memory servers me right, you owe me a hundred ryo."

"Hmmm," Naruto thought back to the many times he left Sai with the lunch check, "Good point. Alright then, here you go. Good thing I have a plenty to spare. Should still be enough to get my girls."

Kakashi watched Naruto count out the money to Sai, "Padding you wallet already, huh. You must have someone in mind,"

Sai shook his head, "Not really. I plan to, as you say, shoot from the hip."

…..

Sitting at a table on the edge of the open floor, Neji went over Hiashi-sama's instructions in his head one more time, 'Use all the money to outbid Uzumaki. If that doesn't work and he still wins Hinata, make sure he doesn't have enough to buy Haruno-san too.' Neji looked around the garden and saw Naruto happily chatting with his team. The blond guy was waving a huge roll of money.

"A fool and his money are soon parted," he murmured then pushed his sake away in frustration, "This is such a waste of time. Hinata-sama has no intention of show up at all. I don't even know what I'm doing here. Oh wait-"

In his mind there was an image of Ino rising above him with her glowing blue eyes and chilling voice screeching, "You will be there, Hyuuga Neji. You will be at the auction to show your love and support to all your friends... and when I say 'Friends', I mean ME!"

Neji barely hid the shiver that went up his spine, 'I swear that woman is fear itself.'

"Good evening, Neji," said a voice above him.

Neji blinked out of his nightmare and found his mild-mannered cousin standing before him, "Hello Kou, I'm surprised to see you here. I didn't think you would be interested in this sort of thing."

Kou sat down across the table and shrugged, "I know, my first impression of a man coming to something like this is someone who is desperate for a date. But when you mentioned that Tenten-chan would be participating, I decided to it wouldn't hurt to try."

Neji's calm attitude disappeared and the friendliness dropped from his voice, "You're here for Tenten?"

"Yes, beautiful Tenten," Kou smiled to himself and his pearl eyes shown with the light of love, "I've been watching her for a long time. She has phenomenal skills and dedication, all wrapped up in a sweet petite package. Of course, I understand that you're here to support your friends and not to worry, I plan on being the utmost gentleman on our date. Oh they're passing out the auction signs. Shall I get one for you too?" Kou left a shell-shocked Neji behind to get a couple signs, not realizing what he had just done.

Back at the table, a tiny muscle began to twitch beside Neji's left eye, "Tenten? MY Tenten?"

….

Behind a heavy curtain corridor, Shizune came rolling down the hall, peeking her head inside each of the rooms to check on the women and giving them their last minute instructions, "Be sure to use the toilet now, ladies. Don't want any accidents on stage. Kumo, be ready in ten minutes. You'll be first in the line up."

Then she criss-crossed the hall into another open door and passed one girl a letter, "Suna, there is a message for you from the Kazekage. Please be ready in fifteen minutes and make a line after Kumo."

She about to continue to the stage then jumped back from the rush of girls running between rooms, "Ame, keep the halls clear. We have people that will need to get to the stage in a hurry. Good evening, Mizukage." Shizune bowed to the stunning woman, "We will need Ame in line and ready to go right after Suna."

Mei was almost done twisting her long auburn locks into a chignon then she secured it with a long hairstick that had jewels hanging off the tip, "We will be ready. Just give us a few more minutes."

"That's all you'll have." Shizune stepped back into the hall and cupped a hand to her mouth, "Iwakagure!"

A dark-haired woman with an angled bob poked her head out of the doorway and flashed a great big grin, "We could hear you all the way from down the hall. Iwa is good to go and we'll be right behind Amekagure." Kurotsuchi looked back into the room, "Get your asses in gear, girls. Don't make me kick you out on stage half-naked!"

Shizune zoomed past their doorway and waved to the Tsukikage's granddaughter, "Good luck, Kurotsuchi-san."

Shizune turned when she gasped and shooed at a couple of girls hiding behind Iwa's open door, "Konoha girls, please return to your dressing rooms and stop spying on the others. It's rude." Then she reached behind a large potted plant and pulled a young teen out by the collar, "Seriously Moegi, is that the best you could do! You're not even supposed to be here. Someone please escort her out." Moegi pouted as she was passed off to a stage hand who pushed her through the exit and into the garden with the growing crowd.

Inside the hotel rooms that doubled for dressing, it was practically standing room only. Ino navigated through the crowd looking for a friend to zip up her blue wiggle dress. She saw a head of pink hair bob among the sea of girls and headed for the far corner where Sakura and Tenten were busy getting dressed.

"Sakura, would you be a dear and help me out?" Ino spun around and pointed to the back zipper. Sakura came as fast as her kimono would let her.

Tenten finished buttoning up the side of her red silk dress embroidered with tiny gold shiruken, "You girls ready?"

"As I'll ever be," replied Sakura as she carefully pulled the zipper over Ino's bra then patted the blond's shoulder when done.

Tenten gave the pink-haired girl a friendly punch on the shoulder, "Come on, Sakura. Get your game face on. It's go-time. Oh look, now Shiho shows up!" The brunette hurried to the door, pulled the shy blond bookworm out of the hall, and into the room. "Hurry, you are cutting it close, Shiho-chan."

Shiho glanced around the room filled with other women and tried not to pay attention to the differences between her body and the others her own age. It felt rather daunting to be lined up beside those girls. Not all of them had hourglass figures like Yamanaka Ino. As kunoichi in the field, most of the girls were rather slim and had good muscle tone like Tenten. She happened to catch the reflection of Haruno Sakura, who had figure like her but had a pair of shapely legs and hips that made any other girl green with envy. Despite the differences in the bodies, both girls seemed to radiate confidence and a sparkling spirit that drew people to them like moths to flames, skills that had always eluded brainy... pasty... weak-as-water Shiho.

Shiho sighed as she found a free space at a table and began setting up her makeup. That Sabaku woman had a point, as a regular kunoichi she didn't have much to offer, but that was the whole point for dating a guy like Nara Shikamaru. Shiho had hoped he would be the type to appreciate intellect over appearance and it had been a lovely experience to have a steady boyfriend.

That awkward meeting with Sabaku had not been entirely unexpected. Shiho knew the odds of Shika's ex-girlfriend coming across them this week and that her reaction would be aggressive. What she didn't expect was Shikamaru's non-reaction to seeing the Sand kunoichi and that every word of the conversation would stick in her head like a bad recording. All night Shiho replayed the incident over and over, relegating the heated emotions into footnotes, organizing then underlining the words according to importance, and found the disturbing kernel of truth. That tidbit rose to the top of everything and it was annotated with a great big number one.

Shiho looked at herself in the mirror and repeated Temari's words to herself. "Is that what he's been telling everyone?" She would have put it down as a clear cut case of 'He said, She said'. Problem was Shikamaru never told anyone anything, especially to her. He was the one who made the first move and asked her on a date. The sneaky bastard simply let her draw her own conclusions and, being the naïve fangirl that she was, Shiho jumped into the relationship with no reservations. Shiho winced and felt like kicking herself. She should have known better. Of all people, an encryption expert should have seen between the lines and pieced together the deception. If Temari and Shikamaru never officially broke up and were keeping their long distance relationship going, then that would make her... Shiho's eyes widened behind her thick glasses... The Other Woman! Her stomach turned sour and Shiho wanted to storm out of the room, find the lazy-ass, and sock a punch on his smug mug.

"Yeah, like he wouldn't see that coming and hide. He's gotten good at that lately. Well, I won't let him have the satisfaction of getting away with pulling the wool over my eyes." Shiho took off her glasses and lifted a make up brush, "Temari is here to find someone new. So will I!" She dipped the end of the brush into her make up palette and began stroking colors onto her face. "No man will make a fool of me again. The next date I go on, I will have my eyes wide open!"

Tenten passed by Shiho and did a double take. The brunette leaned forward and peered at the girl, "Damn!"

Noticing the look on Tenten's face, Shiho blinked her hot pink kissable creme lids and said with pitch black lips, "What?"

Tenten straightened to wave a hand in the air, "Hot mess in aisle eight! Serious makeover emergency right here, people. Ah!" Tenten slapped Shiho's hand before the blond could reach for another cosmetic, "You are cut off."

Sakura came rushing up with a cosmetic box that opened up in several layers and searched her supplies, "Crap, I'm out of primer. Does anyone have any BB cream to spare? We need primer STAT!"

"Kuso, this is why you need to get contacts, Shiho-chan," Ino grumbled as she whipped out the facial wipes and scrubbed raw the whimpering blond's face, "We need to hurry and get her cleaned up or Konohakagure's rep will be a laughing stock." As several of the other girls gathered to tend to Shiho's dilemma, they heard a strangle little sniffle coming from the doorway. They stopped chattering and looked to see Shizune gazing at them with tears brimming in her eyes.

Shizune laughed at the questioning glances thrown her way and she waved a hand, "Don't mind me girls. Go ahead and finish with your makeup then queue behind Iwa." Grabbing a box of tissues, she slipped into a quiet corner of the room to regain her composure, "Goodness, this must be a little taste of what the mother of the bride goes through."

Anko and Kurenai looked at one another then left the young girls to their own devices. Anko leaned next to Shizune and gave her a light punch on the arm, "What's the matter with you?"

"Like you don't know," Shizune's voice came out squeaky as she tried to control her emotions.

Kurenai chuckled and sat down next to her friend, "Actually, I was thinking the very same thing before you came in. It feels like only yesterday when these girls were gangling scrawny little things who would just as easily trip over their own feet as throw a kunai in your eye."

Shizune dabbed a tissue to the corners of her eyes, "Now they're beautiful grown women who can kill a man within twenty paces and they're about to sell themselves to the highest bidder. Amazing how these tender moments sneak up on you."

"Damn it," hissed Anko and choked back a sob, "Why'd you have to go and bring that up? Now I'm getting misty-eyed and I didn't use my waterproof mascara." Ever the practical one, Kurenai held the box for Anko to grab a tissue and catch the tears before they began to smear her eye makeup.

Shizune sniffled as she wiped her nose dry, "Do you think we should give the buyers fair warning?"

With a loud honk, Anko blew her nose then shook her head, "Nah, if they don't know by now to keep their hands to themselves with kunoichi then they don't deserve to live."

"Right," Shizune stood up from her seat and headed for the door, "I need to get moving. I've wasted too much time reminiscing as is. "

"Wait a minute, Shizune," Kurenai tried to chase after the other woman, but she was already half way down the hall, "Don't you need to get ready too?"

"I will, just later," she called back. Shizune knew that she needed to be getting primped and ready just like the others, but little problems kept popping up one after the other. In a way, she was grateful for the constant distractions. If she allowed herself to time sit down and think about the auction, she knew she would freak and bow out at the last minute. Nothing more humiliating than that. A fully grown woman ruining her chances at what could be a perfectly lovely date.

So Shizune threw herself into the minutiae of organizing everything backstage. She did manage to run fingers through her hair and slather a bit of lipstick on her bottom lip without having to glance at a mirror, a talent that developed from running to work on the few mornings she was late. Being a workaholic for all those years had been a quiet benefit for her career and in some ways a relief from the troublesome world of love. She still dreamed of finding love and having a family, but if it was meant to be, love will happen in it's own time. No need to force fate with silly ploys like makeovers, fancy food, and pseudo-dates. At least, that was what she kept telling herself.

The busy brunette was checking her clipboard when she ran into Tsunade in the hallway, "Oh, good evening, Tsunade-sama."

"Report," The Hokage wore a traditional red and black kimono with her formal kage hat, but as always put her own spin on the ensemble by opening up the neckline to take advantage of her tremendous cleavage. Shizune had envied how her mentor was able to incorporate her own style into everything, including running Konohakagure. No doubt, Tsunade-sama would bring in a large sum of money.

Shizune managed a quick bow to avoid passing people before giving her report, "Aside from slight overcrowding, the girls are getting along well. Little spats over mirrors and toilets, but nothing too worrisome. Everyone wants to make sure this goes smoothly. Not a problem in sight."

"Ah, but I see a problem," said Tsunade with a deep frown as she closely inspected her personal assistant, who looked dressed for any other day, while everyone else was dressed to impress. "Why didn't you wear your best outfit?"

Shizune looked down at her sensible gray yukata and smoothed a palm along the black border, "This is my best. I usually wear a dark navy blue yukata with a white collar. I even had this dry cleaned and pressed today."

"You, wild woman, you," muttered Tsunade and clicked her tongue, clearly annoyed with Shizune's lack of imagination when it came to fashion. Ask the woman to operate a triple bypass surgery on a still conscious patient and Shizune would snap on her gloves and march into the operating room barking at the nurses for her scalpel. But plant her in the middle of a dress shop and her brain shuts down faster than a coronary clogged with cholesterol.

Tsunade pulled out the garment bag she was hiding behind her back and handed it to Shizune, much to the woman's horror, "I had a feeling you wouldn't have anything suitable. So I'm lending you a dress and shoes. You're welcome."

Holding the bag as if it was an exploding tag about to go off, Shizune carefully licked her lips while trying to figure out the most diplomatic way to tell her Hokage that her clothes might not fit so well on someone else... especially if that someone else was Flat As A Board Shizune. "Er, Tsunade-sama, you know that I am grateful for your gift, but-"

"NO BUTS," insisted Tsunade as she pushed Shizune into the nearest dressing room, "Go put it on and hurry!"

Ten minutes later, Shizune emerged from the bathroom wearing a deep green wrap dress tightened by a white sash paired with black sheer tights and green heels. She spun around in an awkward circle and sported a bewildered smile on her face, "It fits! It actually fits!"

Tsunade chuckled as she circled her assistant and brushed off any lingering dust, "Of course it fits. The neckline is flattering to every kind of figure. I wore this dress long ago while I dated your uncle." A wistful expression flickered across Tsunade's face then she returned to her usual hard-nose Hokage persona. "I'll take over the organizing from here on out, Shizune-chan. Now make me proud and make me some money!"

Shizune's smile fell and sighed, "She knows just how to ruin the moment for me." Shizune followed her Hokage into the hall then into the curtained corridor where the girls were properly line up.

Tsunade strode to the top of the stairs leading onto the stage where the Kumokagure kunoichi stood and announced for all to hear, "Alright ladies, the men have been waiting patiently for you all evening. Remember this is for your Kage and Country, so get out there and strut your stuff!"


	7. Chapter 7

I do not own Naruto nor make any profit from it

Enjoy!

Chapter 7

From the opposite side of the stage, Shikamaru waited in a dark corner and fiddled with Asuma's lighter, longing for a cigarette. Once in a while he had to tug on the collar of the uncomfortable black bow tie and winced from the itchy starch his mother insisted on adding to the monkey suit, "Man, this is troublesome." He was already regretting volunteering for this gig, but it was too late to back out now. The Hokage and every other female primping for the past three days would throw a major tantrum then tap dance on his kidneys. Right now he figured it was best to concentrate on surviving through the night.

"One hell of situation you set yourself up with, Nara," he mumbled to himself, "Now I have to convince these suckers to pay good money for every single one of these women, including my girlfriends- scratch that, ex-girlfriends." He turned his head in frustration, "Ah, fuck 'em. Relationships are just too troublesome. From now on I'm running solo." Shikamaru sighed as the lights in the garden went down and the stage lights burst onto the curtain. For some reason, he didn't quite believe himself.

With a chorus of cheers and happy clapping from the garden, the lights came on, loud music pumped out the speakers and the stage director motioned for Shikamaru to go on stage. He nodded then stepped out of the safety of the curtains. A spotlight appeared on Shikamaru who walked out from side and lifted the microphone, "Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. I am your host and auctioneer, Nara Shikamaru and welcome to Konohakagure for our first annual Most Available Bachelorette Charity Auction!"

The responding roar from the crowd had him smirking, "My aren't we eager? Then why don't we see these lovely ladies before making up our minds. First up for your viewing pleasure, Kumokagure!"

Taking the lead onto stage, Samui strode down the catwalk wearing a black mini with a high collar and long sleeves, but a circle cutout that exposed one shapely hip. She reached the end and spun around to a chorus of wolf whistles, the loudest which came from Sheranui Genma who momentarily removed his trademark senbon to holler above the others. He moved as close to the stage as possible, making sure he could get Samui's attention.

'The perv better not look up my skirt.' She peered down at Genma to see him smirk and wink playfully at her. 'Someone is confident,' thought Samui as she stepped off the raised platform to let Kauri have her turn, 'Looks like I'll be fending off wandering hands. Yet again.'

When the last of the Kumo women walked behind him and off the stage, Shikamaru pointed to the other side and announced, "Sunakagure!"

Bubbling with nervous excitement, Matsuri waved to where she last saw the Kazekage and his brother before the spotlight blinded her. Kankuro nudged his little brother, who remained stoic and ignored the girl's happy wave to him.

After the other Suna kunoichi had their turns giggling and parading in front of the audience, Temari took long strides across the stage and she blew past Shikamaru without even a glance in his direction. She marched onto the dais, put both hands on her hips, threw the guys her trademark deadly smirk, and hit them with a flash of her teal eyes. It was a clear signal to all men interested. 'Only the strong for this woman. Wimps need not apply.' On her return trip down the catwalk, Temari did lock eyes with Shikamaru for half a second. To his credit, he didn't shrink under her gaze but she caught the hint of sadness in his small smile. She steeled her heart and continued to the backstage.

He quickly pulled himself together enough to introduce the next group, "Gotta love, Suna. And here comes Amekagure..."

At Shikamaru's announcement, Ei and Onoki forgot about their competition to sit up properly in their seats. Swinging her hips to the beat, the Mizukage strut onto the stage where catcalls greeted the stunning woman. When she reached the dais, Mei reached up to her bun and pulled a long hair stick and with a head-shake her long glorious auburn waves rolled down bare shoulders. Mei gave the audience a sultry smile then blew a kiss. All the Ame shinobi had to fight the urge to hit the decks, but more than a few others dropped to avoid any acid mist. An embarrassed Gaara covered his eyes with one hand when his own big brother raised his arms in self-defense.

When he heard Gaara clear his throat, Kankuro peered between elbows to see the nothing lying in a melted mess, "Sorry."

After a set of green-haired twins from Ame finished walking off the stage, Shikamaru signaled for Iwa to hit the stage, "Put your hands together and give it up for Iwakagure!"

Onoki glowered and grumbled when his classy granddaughter, Kurotsuchi came out on the stage with arms waving and whooping it up with the crowd.

When she reached the top, Kurotsuchi cupped a hand to one ear and yelled, "Not good enough, people. I wanna hear ya' louder! Oh yeah, get ready, boys! Princess on the menu. Woooo!" She spun on one foot and circled a hand in the air.

Onoki hung his head in embarrassment, "Ugh, how does Kurotsuchi-chan expect anyone to take her seriously when she acts like that."

"Relax, Tsukikage-sama." Nodding his head to the music, Akatsuchi lifted his tall glass of lemonade and gestured at the entire garden, "That would be the point of this whole charity auction. To have fun while doing something nice for someone else. You gotta admit. She's got flare."

Onoki glared at Akatsuchi with suspicion, "Watch yourself, boy."

The huge man paled and seemed to visibly shrink to the size of a pea in front of the elderly kage, "My apologies, sir." He gulped down more of his lemonade and watched the rest of his countrywomen walk the stage.

Shikamaru waited until the last Iwa kunoichi stepped off the catwalk, before announcing, "And last but not least, from my home and yours... Konohakagure!"

A loud round of applause opened up for the Hokage as she led the Konoha ladies down the runway. Tsunade glided like a goddess as the hem of her red embroidered kimono dragged on the floor. When done spinning on the dais, she tipped her red hat to the people below and made way for the women behind.

…..

Beneath the catwalk, Killer Bee enjoyed the angled view of the women walking above him. "Huh huh. Oh yeah, that one's real nice. No doubt, she'll get a high price." Killer Bee wiggled his eyebrows when a purple-haired kunoichi passed him, but she sneered and turned her nose up at him. He took it in stride with a laugh, "Don't know what you're missing, baby. Killer Bee's a lot of fun. I know how to treat a lady. Hey, no need to run..." Bee chuckled as he followed her down the catwalk. He found it fascinating that the woman was merely annoyed at him instead of being absolutely terrified.

He tried to chase after his flustered target, when a firm hand held him in place and a gentle voice said, "Good evening, Bee. My my my! Those Konoha ladies are lovely, aren't they."

The guy turned his head and jumped to see the Raikage's secretary pulling him back to the end of the runway, "Mabui-san, you're here!? Not that I care, but weren't you supposed to be there?" He pointed toward the backstage where the other Kumo women were waiting for the promenade to end.

Mabui chuckled at his presumption that she would be on the prowl for a man and positioned them near the dais to get a better view of the women, "Not my style of dating, besides I'm here to purchase the company of a beautiful young lady."

Bee nearly lost his shades but he was quick to catch them and put them back on his nose, "Well damn, that came out of left field." Then Bee sputtered when she shot him a nasty look, "Not that you bein' a lesbian is a big deal."

"I'm not a lesbian," Her mouth twitched with a frown then she smiled and returned to admiring the bachelorettes, "Your brother wanted to make sure you had the opportunity to court a woman he thought would be a good match for you and asked me to purchase a date on your behalf."

Bee turned beet red at the very idea, "Tch! Keep the money, Mabui. I can buy a girl all on my own. I don't need my bro to float me a loan." The Eight-tail Jinchurriki crossed his arms and stewed like a child, "Still tryin' to tie me down like a sorry dog, that big ol fool! This meddlin' in my life just ain't cool!"

Continuing to observe the women as they walked along the stage, Mabui shrugged at Bee's useless tantrum, "He wants you to be happy. That's all, Bee. Remember, your brother will always be up in your business. So get over it. HEL-LO Hoochie-mama!"

Killer Bee followed the secretary's wide-eyed gaze to see Mitarashi Anko walk on stage and his own jaw dropped. Skin, skin, and more skin, what wasn't covered in leather strips presumable sown together into a dress was laid bare for the world to see. Anko was a wardrobe malfunction ready and willing to happen. Whistles and yells followed the kunoichi as she strolled along, lapping up the attention like a cat to cream. When she passed by the Eight-tailed Jinchurrikki gaping at her, the woman paused long enough on the dais to place a hand on one hip then give him a wink.

Bee pointed at the barely dressed kunoichi sashaying her way off the catwalk, "Bid on that one! Yeeaah I want her! Look at that piece of ass, ya can't get any hotter."

Mabui pursed her lips at the man's change of heart of using his brother's money then gave him a curt reply, "Absolutely not, Bee. You've already had more than your fair share of that type of girl."

"But-"

Mabui raised a forefinger at Bee, "No! And that's the end of it."

"Don't see nothin wrong with her. Shawty got a rockin' body and killer thighs," He glowered and grumbled under his breath, "Don't see it's anybody's business what a man buys."

With a tired sigh, Mabui rolled her emerald eyes and continued to search the other ladies on the catwalk, ignored the griping coming from Bee.

"Just cause she's flashy, don't always... Uh...um...," Killer Bee paused and snapped his fingers while trying to think of the right words.

"Tell you what's inside," finished a soft voice from above.

Killer Bee grinned then looked up to where the answer came from, "What's inside! That's right! Thank you, Bright eyes."

Shizune politely nodded in response, "Your welcome." Then she stepped off the dais and headed back to where the others waited. As Killer Bee continued to bitch and moan about his brother, Mabui watched the brunette in the green dress with a white sash and a fabulous idea grew in her head.

…..

On the opposite side of the catwalk, Shino and Kiba waited patiently for the ladies to finish their promenade, "You have some money to use, Kiba," Shino nodded a greeting to Ino, who glowed in flowing blue dress. She beamed at him and Kiba then she peered into the darkness beyond the spotlight, waving to her other friends in the crowd.

"Um, sure I do," said Kiba as he rocked on his heels and rolled his eyes up in thought, "I have a good thirty to forty ryo in my wallet."

Shino stopped watching the parade to stare at his friend from behind the sunglasses, "That is not going to beat Uzumaki."

"What do want from me? I don't get paid until the end of the week anyways," Kiba slapped a hand on Shino's back, "That's where you come in my friend, who is the son of the rich and powerful Aburame Shibi."

"Always assuming," Shino went back to watching the Konoha ladies on stage and casually mentioned, "Just so you know. I'm using my own money, not any of my father's."

Kiba gaped for moment then ran a hand through his messy brown hair, "Shit! Then poor Hinata's gonna be crushed when she finds herself sharing a date with Sakura."

"I'm also disappointed that you think I came unprepared."

Kiba looked back up at his teammate, "But you said that your dad isn't giving you any help."

There was an edge to Shino's voice as he explained, "Unlike some people, I save my paychecks. Not squander it on gambling, women, and squeaky toys."

Kiba huffed at the implications that he was a spendthrift, "Hey, squeaky toys are expensive but those are legitimate equipment for a dog nin. They encourage Akamaru's mental development and provide necessary stress relief after missions."

Light glinted off of the rims of Shino's glasses and he lowered his voice, "I wasn't talking about his squeaky toys." All of sudden they heard excited shouting from behind them and turned to see Lee jumping from his chairs, pointing to the object of his eternal affection.

In a short kimono in pale pink and green leaf detailing, Sakura had appeared on stage and was making her way down the catwalk.

"Look! There she is. There is my most beautiful cherry blossom!" He raised his hand and shouted as Sakura passed by him, "ONE HUNDRED RYO FOR HARUNO SAKURA! HAH! I DARE YOU TO OUTBID ME, NARUTO!"

Guy jumped from behind his student, "Not now, Lee. The bidding hasn't started!" He quickly snatched Lee's arm from the air and tried to laugh off all the stares from everyone around them, "Don't mind him. He's just pumped up about tonight. You know how hot-blooded youth can take over good sense."

Sakura cringed and blushed at how Lee kept pointing to her and shouting out one bid after another despite his sensei's best efforts to keep him under control. She did a quick bow on the dais, lifted her white fan higher to hide her face, and hurried a little faster off the stage.

"And there they go," said Kiba as he slipped Akamaru a handful of h'orderves he picked up from a wandering waiter, "I wonder how Hinata is doing? Yesterday, she mentioned that she might withdraw and I don't see her anywhere."

Shino carefully read the program again then pointed to the list of Konoha ladies, "Kurenai-sensei seems pretty confident that she'll show up. Hinata is still listed here on the program."

Kiba gave a long whistle, "Then she better get here quick. Their little parade is just about done and then it's on with the bidding."

…..

"You're doing _what_?"

Ignoring Hinata's stare from behind her, Hanabi carefully traced the candy apple red gloss along her lips then blew an air kiss at the mirror, "Mwah! I am a last minute addition to The Most Eligible Bachelorette Auction."

Hinata squeaked and hyperventilated to see her little sister primp and preen for the event, "You are f-fifteen! Underage! You can't possibly do this," After one last spritz of hairspray, Hanabi left the bathroom and headed out their shared bedroom with Hinata following on her heels, "F-Father, tell her she can't do this."

Hanabi wrapped a light shawl around her shoulders and stopped in front of the long hall mirror spun to check her dress one last time, "Protest all you want, neesan. We already talked it over with the Hokage. Tsunade-sama said as long as our dear old daddy gives his permission and that the suitor does not take advantage of the situation, it is perfectly fine for me to participate."

Hiashi looked up from a book he was reading and regarded the girls from his study across the hall. He narrowed his eyes at how Hanabi relished her role a little too much and grumbled, "Dear old daddy?" He cleared his throat and used his no-nonsense voice that usually flustered his elder daughter, "She is correct, Hinata. Hanabi is going to the auction and I would prefer you accompany her to keep your sister safe. I want you to make sure her suitor understands these rules and that she returns home safely after the auction. Now off you go, girls." He stood up and placed Hinata's long gray jacket on her shoulders then pushed his daughters out the door.

"Th-this is insane," whispered Hinata as she and Hanabi strolled down the street leading to the Konoha Hotel. She was experiencing more anxiety than usual tonight. The downtown streets were extra noisy and crowded, setting her on edge. Many vendors had set up camp around the hotel in hopes of catching some of the Charity merrymakers.

Hanabi cupped a hand to her ear, "What was that?"

"I-I said," Hinata took a deep breath and shouted as best she could, "This is INSANE!"

"Whoah, I think you might have busted an eardrum that time," Hanabi wiggled a finger in one ear and gave her sister a thumbs up, "Good for you."

Hinata whined as she wrung her hands one over the other, "How could you be joking at a time like this?"

Hanabi stopped walking and threw her arms wide, "Because, this is about having a good time, meeting someone new, and helping some kids out. Charity is supposed to give you warm happy feelings!" She grasped her sister by both hands and whispered, "You can do it, Hinata. Embrace the warm and happy feelings. Positive vibes are good for the soul."

Hinata pouted and dropped her head in disgust, "Now you're just being ridiculous."

"True, but it doesn't mean I'm wrong." A mischievous glint twinkled in Hanabi's eye as they returned to walking down the street. She certainly relished teasing her older sister, especially this night.

They walked through the front doors of the hotel and passed by the open gateway leading to the garden. Music and merriment blasted into the lobby and drew in many visitors to watch the event. Hinata watched in wide-eyed wonderment as the beautiful women of Konoha strut down the catwalk and she began to question her decision. Everyone looked like they were having fun.

Hanabi grabbed her sister by the arm and tugged Hinata toward the hall marked for dressing rooms, "Neesan, I need you to go in the back with me."

"Why," Hinata didn't understand why her sister was acting so strangely, "H-how am I supposed to find your suitor and explain the rules to him?"

"You can do that afterward. I need your support. Please, please, please?" A tiny tear formed in the corner of Hanabi's eye and her bottom lip quivered.

Hinata was always a sucker for her baby sister's routine and sighed, "Alright."

As she let Hanabi drag her into the dressing room hall, Hinata whispered, "I know what father said, but I'm still not sure about letting you date some total stranger. What would it t-take to change your mind?"

Hanabi's attention was distracted to something behind Hinata, but before the older Hyuuga could turn, Hanabi cleared her throat and grabbed her sister by the hand, "Funny you should mention that."

"Oh there you are my darling student," cried Kurenai from the other side and the older woman grasped Hinata in hug then pulled back to lovingly pinch the girl's cheeks, "I have always adored those cute chubby cheeks of yours, Hinata-chan."

"Y-you see them almost everyday, sensei," mumbled Hinata as her face was pulled and wiggled like play dough under Kurenai's hands.

Kurenai smiled brightly then let go of the girl, "I know, dear. It was just so nice to see you in the backstage to cheer on your little sister. Sometimes I'm so proud of you I could burst!"

She was caught completely off guard from her sensei's gushing and simply smiled, "Thank you, Kurenai-sensei. It's really n-nice to hear-"

"Hinata-chan," interrupted someone who was closing in fast. She turned for only a moment to see who needed her then looked back to find Kurenai gone.

Tenten dove into Hinata for a hug and slipping her hand underneath the long gray coat off, "So good to see you! Are you here supporting your sister?" She swung the other kunoichi, spun her around like a top, then rising and lifting the sleeve to remove Hinata's coat. "Let me hang that up for you." Then Tenten draped the coat over one arm and disappeared into the backstage.

"Tenten, wait!" Hinata tried to go after her, but ran straight into a cloud of hairspray, streaming from a can held in Ino's hand.

Ino slid to Hinata's side brandishing a brush and hairspray. "I'm sorry, Hina-chan. I thought you were Tenten. Since I'm here, can I try something out on you. Okay, why don't we brush this to the side. Flip the ends over here aaand... lacquer it into place."

Hinata squeezed her eyes shut and coughed from all the hairspray, "That's t-too much, Ino." When she could smell fresh air instead of synthetic strawberries, Hinata finally opened her eyes to see Ino grinning proudly.

"Yes, that will do nicely. Now, on to Tenten!" Ino rushed into the dressing room hall, leaving a very confused Hinata behind.

"That was weird. I hope she didn't mess with your hair too, Hanabi. Hanabi?" Hinata looked around and found her sister had disappeared as well, "N-now what happened to her." She walked further down the hall only to come face to face with a grinning Sakura.

"Oh hello Hinata-chan. So good to see you," Sakura held up something black and fastened it around the other's neck, "You know, this necklace doesn't suit me very well, but it would look fabulous on you, Hinata. Why don't you have it."

Hinata wheezed as she dug one finger under the necklace, "Is it supposed to be this t-tight?"

"It is a choker. But you're right," Sakura unhitched the black velvet choker, dug into a pouch and pulled out a string of black pearls, "This would look so much better on you and the contrast against your skin will look amazing."

Running fingers along the shiny black pearls, Hinata lifted the end for the other kunoichi to take back, "But don't you need it for tonight, Sakura?"

Sakura held up a hand to stop her, "You can just hold on to it for me until I need it. If you'll excuse me, I have to go check on something."

"B-but Sakura," Hinata was about to chase her pink-haired friend when she saw Hanabi at the top of the stairs leading to the stage and waving to her, "Oh there you are. Where did you run off to? It's an utter madhouse back here," Then Hinata saw Anko stroll by in her barely there leather mini-dress.

Anko waved as she walked past both girls whose eyes nearly popped out of their heads, "Hey, Hinata, Hanabi-chan! Say 'Hi' to your dad for me."

Having a near apoplexy, Hinata pointed in the direction of Anko's strapped back, "I-I was wrong. It's not a madhouse. It's a whorehouse!" She stamped a determined foot on the stair and held her ground in front of Hanabi, "Y-you will drop out and go home now! A-as you're older sister, I expressly forbid you to participate!"

Hanabi measured the distance between them and the open stage then hung her head low, "You're right. Forgive me, neesan. I don't know what I was thinking and you always know what's best for me. I'll go inform the Hokage that I'm out of the auction."

Relief flooded into Hinata and she placed a hand on her little sister's shoulder, "Thank goodness!"

Hanabi grabbed her older sister by the shoulders and planted a kiss full on Hinata's lips. Whispering a firm "Good luck", Hanabi pushed her stunned sister from the safe zone behind the velvet curtains and into the middle of a dark stage.

"And for our first official auction of the night, please welcome Hyuuga Hinata!" A bright spotlight blasted from out of nowhere and an uproar of applause filled the air. There was no mistaking the overwhelming sensation that hundreds of eyes were focusing her, staring at her, inspecting her... and anticipating. She wanted to run away screaming at the top of her lungs like a madwoman. In her imagination, Hinata was doing just that.

The sad reality was that her feet remained stuck to one spot on stage and her gaping mouth squeaked out a weak, "Aaaahhhh..."

Basking in the glory of how everything went according to plan, Hanabi gave Kurenai a happy thumbs up then tilted her head at the shocked expressions of her collaborators, "What?"

"Rather unorthodox way of wishing someone good luck," muttered Kurenai.

Hanabi shrugged her shoulders and rolled her eyes, "I'm allowed to give my sister a kiss."

Ino pointed to her own lips, "But on the mouth?"

Hanabi put one hand on her hip then threw the other arm out in Hinata's direction and yelled, "How else was I supposed to get some lip gloss on her? And it's a good thing I did because that is the only color on her face right now."

"Damn," Kurenai doubled-checked to see if it was true and snapped her fingers, "I hoped pinching her cheeks would be enough for a rosy glow, if only in the short term."

Ino peered at the frozen Hinata gaping at the audience who were staring right back at her, "Two seconds short enough for ya'?"

Tenten pushed a curtain back to get a better look at what was going onstage, "What is she doing?"

"Nothing." Sakura slowly shook her head in disbelief, "Absolutely positively nothing."

"Aw not again!" Hanabi watched in horror as her sister struggle with massive stage fright.

Shikamaru cleared his throat and walked across the stage to Hinata. He took her by the arm and gently guided her to the center as the spotlight followed them both. He held the microphone up and asked, "So Hinata-san, tell us a little bit about yourself. What's it like to be the Heir to the Hyuuga Clan, their vast fortunes and keeper of a formidable kekkei genkai?"

Hinata barely manged to register Shikamaru's voice in front of her and all she uttered was a slurred, "Eeeh... urrrk."

"WORK," interpreted Shikamaru as he pulled the microphone away from Hinata, "Obviously, being part of the Hyuugas is not all about luxury, but a lot of hard work and determination. An admirable trait from such a prestigious family. Wouldn't it be a privilege to spend a romantic evening with her, folks?" He started clapping and the audience automatically joined him, helping the stricken Hinata to relax enough to breath again.

Hanabi pointed a finger at the master of ceremonies, "That man is a genius."

Ino smirked proudly at the view of her teammate, "Hmph, tell us something we don't know."

Shikamaru waved a hand to the crowd, "So gentlemen, who shall start the bidding?"

Kankuro raised his hand with a shout, "One ryo!"

Shikamaru lowered his mic and glared into the crowd, "One? One? This is the eldest daughter of the famous Hyuuga Hiashi, leader of the entire clan, and you want to buy an evening of her time for one ryo?"

Gaara did the honor of slapping his brother upside the head.

"Twenty ryo," shouted Neji as he stood from his table while flashing his sign.

Hinata activated her byakugan and found her stony-faced cousin standing from his seat wielding a numbered sign like a kunai, "Neji-niisan?"

"Thank you, sir," said Shikamaru, "Twenty ryo. Do I hear more?"

Kiba lifted his arm high, "Thirty ryo!"

Shikamaru pointed in Kiba's direction, "Thirty ryo. We have thirty ryo, people. Do I hear forty?"

"Forty ryo," shouted Naruto then he turned to Sai and Kakashi, "This is going better than I thought. At this rate I'll might be able to squeeze in one more girl with Sakura and Hinata. Hey, how about I get Temari too! She could use some cheering up from the..." He swiped a rose from a vase on a table and clamped it between his teeth, "Master of _Rrrr-omance._"

Sai watched Naruto flex his muscles and pose while flashing his auction sign to keep up the the bidding. Sai leaned back and whispered to Kakashi, "I always wondered if Naruto had a death wish. Now I know."

After seeing Naruto's bravado, Neji decided to stop playing around and raised the stakes, "Two hundred fifty." He looked toward Naruto, who had spat out his rose and was glaring hatefully at him, 'Let's see if your budget can still handle both girls now, Uzumaki.'

"Two hundred fifty, I have two hundred fifty! Any other bids?" Shikamaru waited a couple seconds then nodded, "Alright then. Two fifty going once. Two fifty going twice-"

"Three hundred," said Shino as he lifted his sign for the first time. A murmur rumbled through the crowd.

Shikamaru winked at a surprised Hinata and gave her a comforting pat on the hand, "We have three hundred folks. Anyone for three fifty? Anyone?"

Naruto switched his sights from Neji to Shino and frowned at the hooded figure across the garden, "Three fifty!"

Hinata felt her spirit soar. He was fighting for her. That was why Shikamaru reassured her. The others had planned all along to push Naruto-kun into realizing her worth and fighting for her. No doubt about it, she had the best friends in the world.

"Four hundred," countered Shino.

"Four fifty!"

"Five hundred!"

Naruto growled and yelled, "Five fifty!" Sweat began to bead on his forehead and watched his opponent. Five hundred and fifty ryo was all he had left, but he would be damned if he let Shino, The Walking Bugs Nest, snake a win from underneath him. Hinata clasped sweating hands together and tried to keep her body from shaking with excitement.

"Five fifty going once..." Shikamaru paused to check the other bidders, "Five fifty going twice." Shino didn't move and Neji was more than satisfied that Naruto blew his entire budget on Hinata. The Hyuuga nin relaxed into his seat and sipped his sake in utter contentment. His mission was completed and sanity would return to the Hyuuga household.

Shikamaru held the last syllable pointing to either "Sss-"

"Six hundred."

Everyone turned to see Shino with his auction sign held high and the rumble of whispers began to build. Neji nearly spat sake in Kou's face and he stood up from the chair, his back rim rod straight.

Shikamaru cleared his throat and chuckled lightly, "Uh, six hundred. We are now at six hundred ryo. Any bids? Anyone else?" Shikamaru looked over at the Hyuuga table. Neji had to shrug helplessly. Hiashi-sama gave him a sizable amount but he simply didn't have enough money.

"Sai," Naruto turned on his teammate who pulled his pack tighter to his side and began walking backwards slowly, "Come on good buddy, good pal. I need my money back. It's my money. Give it back!"

Akamaru whined and gave Shino's leg a gentle push while Kiba stood in shock at his friend, "Hey Shino. What are you doing? Remember, Naruto is who she wants."

On stage, Hinata felt her heart sink and wrung her hands faster and faster. It was a mistake. Clearly Shino-san was caught up in the heat of battle and not in his right mind. But as the seconds ticked away, he didn't take back his bid, only standing there on the floor and staring right at her. She turned to where Naruto stood and hoped that he had one last trick up his sleeve, 'Why not? Ever since they were kids, he always had an ace in the hole, didn't he? Didn't he?'

But Shikamaru knew a checkmate when he saw it and shaking his head, he ended the auction quickly, "Six hundred going once, twice, SOLD!"

A dramatic "NOOOOOO!" came wailing from Naruto's corner as he raised both hands to the sky and dropped to his knees in lament. With tears brimming in her eyes and Shikamaru escorting her offstage, a depressed Hinata really really wanted to join in the crying.


	8. Chapter 8

I do not own Naruto nor make any profit from it

Chapter Eight

A dramatic "NOOOOOO!" resonated from Naruto's corner as he raised both hands to the sky and dropped to his knees in front of his table. People around the garden whispered and stared into their corner.

"Get a grip, Naruto," muttered Kakashi then pulled his student's forehead from the floor. He picked up a mai-tai from a passing waiter and handed Naruto the drink, "You still have your money and Sakura will be up soon. You still have a chance for a date. So relax."

Naruto stopped in mid-wail to think then hopped up from the floor, "That's right! And now with the Hyuugas out of the picture. Sakura-chan will be all mine. All MINE!" Naruto grinned that he still had his second chance at love and took a deep gulp from his mai-tai. He felt much better from the drink, if only a bit woozy.

Chouji came strolling down the garden path and waved to the other three, "Hello, Naruto. What's all yours?"

Kakashi clapped a hand on the rotund guy on the back, "Welcome, Chouji! What kept you? You missed the first auction. Here, have a sign." He motioned for a waiter to give the newcomer a numbered paddle.

"Don't mind if I do," said Chouji as he grabbed a chair and made himself comfortable at their table, "So what's new? Who bought who?"

"Shino pulled a fast one and snatched Hinata-chan from me," growled Naruto and he imagined twisting Shino's neck with his bare hands, "Can you believe it? Since when did Shino ever think of Hinata like that?"

"Er," Chouji rubbed his head and gave them a nervous grin, "Actually, it wasn't that long ago. I didn't say anything because it was none of my business. We were on a mission together when I noticed Shino noticing Hinata. But like always, he played it cool and didn't do anything. I mean, why would he? Everyone and their dog knows about Hinata's crush on you. Guess he figured he didn't stand a chance."

Sai's odd smile grew wider, "Looks like Shino has his chance now."

"He might have a hard time explaining that to Hinata," prophesied Kakashi, "I hope he's gotten better at dodging. She might a gentle creature, but if her Gentle Fists connect, she could knock him out for a week."

Sai turned to the Akimichi and asked, "By the way, Chouji, I believe you owe me eighty ryu from the BBQ dinner last week."

"I suppose I do. Hang on." Chouji dug into his pants and pulled out his wallet, "It's a good thing I hit the bank and made sure to bring plenty of money. Here you go, Sai. Eighty ryu."

Sai slipped the bills into his pack, "Thank you. Perhaps I better go around and call in my marks before they run out of money."

"Don't you mean 'Markers'," asked Kakashi.

Once again Sai had that annoying smile on his face, "No."

Chouji waited until Sai left the table before muttering, "No disrespect meant, but he still scares me. Who's up next?" Kakashi silently held up the program which Chouji read out loud. "Yamanaka Ino," The rotund nin sighed and started counting the money left in his wallet, "Lucky I got here when I did or she would've had my head on a silver platter."

…..

At the same time and on the other side of the stage, Kiba fumed and glared at Shino. His arms were crossed tightly across his chest and he was about to Gatsuga the shit out of the stupid bastard. "Give me a reason, one reason, why I shouldn't kick your ass right now."

Deep within his hood, Shino lowered his head to think then removed his dark shades so that Kiba could see his eyes, "I couldn't let go of her, Kiba."

"Let go," Kiba shook his head in confusion, "Since when did you ever have her? And put your sunglasses back on, no need to hurt your eyes like that." Kiba waited as Shino replaced the shades over his sensitive pupils. The poor guy was already squinting from the harsh glare of the stage lights.

Shino looked up and said, "For less than a minute, I let myself imagine being with Hinata and I couldn't let Naruto take my one chance with her. Not when Hinata threw herself at him and he continued to waste his time pursuing Sakura."

Kiba winced and nodded with Shino, "Yeah, I gotta agree with you on the Sakura bit, but you should have said something before, buddy. I wouldn't have pushed you into this."

"I didn't realize it myself until now," Shino murmured then he grabbed Kiba by the jacket collar with both hands, "It's not like me to do this, Kiba. It's crazy and selfish, I know, but I had to take the chance. Even if it's one night with her, at least I won't wonder 'What if' for the rest of my life."

Kiba pulled back and huffed at his teammate's moment of weakness, "You might have set yourself up for the worst night of your life." He lifted both hands up, "But your money, your decision. Although you're gonna figure out what to tell Hinata."

….

The spotlight turned back on to Shikamaru, who had finished slowly guiding a shocked Hinata to her sister's arms, "And now please welcome our next auction-"

"Yamanaka Ino," finished the kunoichi as she came strutting onto the stage. With a flourish of her sky blue dress and waving hands, Ino tottered over to Shikamaru then bent his microphone towards her.

"You can call me, Ino-chan," She kept tilting the mic towards her as her teammate struggled to find a polite way of taking it back, "My family owns the Yamanaka Flower Shop that supplied the hotel with their beautiful table arrangements. Aren't they exquisite? We have various assortments of flora that can be customized to your taste. Want to impress your girl? Get her a bouquet from the Yamanaka Flower Shop. You can't go wrong!" Then she flashed a peace sign before Shikamaru ripped his mic from her grip.

"IF," Shikamaru ignored Ino's pout when he pushed her to the forefront of the stage, "You're done with the commercials, shall we begin the auction?" He eyed the corner where Ino's parents merely shrugged. "A quick reminder for interested parties, all auctions are final. If you don't have the money, don't bid in the first place... otherwise alternative methods of payments will be enforced." There was moment of tension as every bachelor felt imaginary kunai points digging in their backs.

Shika grinned, "We accept all major credit cards and can set up payments at exorbitant interest rates. Now, starting the bidding at one. Do I hear one ryu?"

Like before, Kankuro raised his hand, "One ryu."

"Thank you," Shika nodded in Kankuro's direction, "We have one, folks. Do I hear two?"

Kiba lifted his sign and shouted his voiced, "Two ryu."

Shino looked at his friend and raised an eyebrow above his sunglasses, "You'd really go on a date with Ino?"

"No, not really," chuckled Kiba as he returned both hands to his jacket pockets, "But if I were interested, that would be all I'd pay for her. My eardrums are still jacked up from her last karaoke performance." A pained whine of agreement came from Akamaru as the dog ducked down and shook his furry head.

"Do I hear more?" Shikamaru smiled at Ino, who only seemed to be getting more irritated by the second.

"Ten," said Chouji as he cheerfully waved his sign in the air.

"Ten? Ten?" Ino crossed her arms and stewed impatiently. She listened to bids that increased by single digit increments until she couldn't stand the indignity, "This is ridiculous. Give me that, Shika."

Shikamaru tried to grab the microphone back, "Ino?"

The kunoichi covered the mic with one hand and hissed at him, "You did fine with Hinata-chan but right now you're doing a piss-poor job for me. Let me show you how it's done."

Shikamaru held up his hands in defeat and stepped away, "Fine. Take over. No skin off my back."

"Well now," Ino sauntered down the catwalk as she took over the show, "Surely such brave handsome group of men as yourselves can do better than ten ryo for an evening with me!" She then hit them wit the full blast of her charm, blues eyes sparkling and pink lips pursed.

"Twenty," shouted a nin from Suna.

She turned to where Shino and Kiba were standing then waved in their direction, "Do I hear more? Thirty perhaps?" She flashed them a sly wink and smile.

Kiba was bewildered to see his hand lift at the thirty ryo mark then incredibly relieved when another bid sent it up to forty. "Damn, that was close. Nearly spent some of my money. Is she using her mind control jutsu or something?"

"That's it exactly," muttered Shino who apparently seemed immune to the kunoichi's charms, "She used her Pretty Girl Smiles no Jutsu. Powerful stuff."

Kiba snarled at Akamaru as the dog panted in laughter, "Shove it!"

Within the span of a few minutes, the money accumulated faster and faster with Ino egging the bidders higher and higher, "Two hundred ain't good enough people, I want to hear better! Do I see two fifty?"

Thanks to years of being Ino's teammate, Chouji knew his duty well and lifted his sign, "Two fifty!"

"Three hundred," countered the Suna nin.

Ino began skipping around the stage in an excited tizzy. She was so wrapped up in squeezing money from the men that she forgot who was bidding and pointed at her teammate's table, "You gonna take that?"

Confused and worried about what his teammate actually wanted, Chouji tentatively raised his bid, "Three fifty?"

The Suna nin was not about to lose all his emotional investment in the bidding. He was ready to yell four hundred when a fellow Sand nin whispered in his ear.

"Oh," was what he ended up replying. Then he shrugged and tucked his sign out of sight.

High on adrenalin, Ino spun on the catwalk and announced gleefully, "Three hundred and fifty ryo going, once, twice, sold!" The audience broke into applause for the faced paced surprise twist in their entertainment. They were truly impressed at how Ino was able to coax such excitement from the bachelors. She bowed low and proudly walked off the stage to find the other girls clapping in admiration as well.

Naruto and Kakashi looked at Chouji, who slumped in his chair. He moaned, "I was supposed to be baiting. She wanted to find a rich prince to date. Not me. Ino is going to kill me."

Backstage, all the Leaf kunoichi were gathering around the excited blond, "That was amazing, Ino-chan!"

"An impressive job, indeed," said Shizune with a warm smile as she checked the line up for the next few girls.

The Hokage nudged Ino with one elbow, "Hosting talent like that shouldn't go wasted. It's good to know we can call on you for next time."

"Next time," sputtered Shizune, who shuddered at the thought of going through this crap again, "Don't you mean next year?"

Tsunade smile grew wider and the woman hummed knowingly. "Okay, Shiho is up," The Hokage pulled the newly made-over blond and pushed her on stage, "Go get 'em, girl."

…..

When Shiho walked out from the curtain, Shikamaru rushed from the other side of the stage and stopped her from reaching the spotlight. He carefully looked over his 'girlfriend' then reached over and pulled her thick glasses off her face.

"Hey," She protested and tried to snatch them back.

"You'll get them back in a minute. Trust me," he murmured and pocketed the glasses into his suit jacket, "You want to show off your pretty eyes."

Shiho whispered, "You think my eyes are pretty?"

Shikamaru ignored the question and guided her into the spotlight. He lifted the up the microphone, "Here we have a rare gem, folks. A real diamond in the rough waiting for the right man to help her shine and Kankuro, if you dare say one ryo, I will stuff that Pocky up your ass." Said Suna nin stopped chewing on the sweet treat and growled at the host.

After the laughter died, Shika returned to auctioning off his ex-girlfriend, "Shiho may look ordinary but she has a quick mind. Ask her just about any question and she'll come up with an answer."

One man in the audience called out, "How many species of white crane exist?"

Despite barely being able to see past her nose, she held her head high and sniffed at the ease of the question, "Please, fifteen."

Another voice yelled, "What's the square root of one thousand one hundred and twenty seven?"

Shiho's face went blank for a second before she started spouting, "Thirty three point fifty seven zero eight two zero six six-" She stopped talking when Shikamaru tugged on her sleeve as a warning.

Ao cupped on hand to his mouth and shouted from his table, "What's this year's root formula to cracking Konoha's secret code to Suna?" That last question earned a harsh glare from Shiho and just about every Leaf shinobi in the garden.

With a goofy grin, he rubbed the back of his head and grinned, "It was an honest question."

"And here's an honest answer," Shiho squinted in the direction of the fuzzy figure, "You can go f-

"Enough chatting up the girl," interrupted Shikamaru as he stepped into the limelight again, "It's time to get on with the bidding. Shall we start at ten?"

When the evening started, Omoi had yet to make up his mind among the many women that strut the catwalk. There were more than enough beauties that caught his eye, but none of them actually peaked his interest. Then that stick thin bookworm came along and held her ground on stage... unlike that Hyuuga princess who looked like a beautiful geisha doll on the verge of fainting. His gut was telling him to take a chance and that little demo of the girl's mind was what sealed the deal for him.

Omoi lurked in the shadows of a corner and watched the bidding for the scrawny little blond with amusement. The end of his lollipop stick switched places along the corners of his mouth as his tongue rolled the candy back and forth at an increasing rate. A few men threw some pity bids in the beginning, but anyone could see none were truly serious about her. All the better for him.

"One hundred fifty ryo going once... Going twice..."

"Two hundred," intercepted Omoi. There was a surprise murmur in the crowd as he emerged from between the shadows of ficus and an ice pillar.

Shikamaru glanced between Omoi and the business man with pearl earrings, "We have a last minute bid of two hundred ryo. Do I hear two fifty?"

The rich and powerful Kunijirou took a moment to weigh whether or not to it was worth squaring off with a young shinobi from Kumo. He shook his head at Shikamaru's query and patted his son's shoulder, "Maybe we can find another math tutor for you, Kunihisa."

The relieved kid fell backwards in his seat, "Works for me!"

Shikamaru nodded in understanding, "Sold, for two hundred ryo!"

Shiho snatched her glasses from Shikamaru's hands and tried to see the guy who bought her, but her ex-boyfriend was already leading her offstage by the time her pupils were refocused.

All she caught was a brief glimpse of the dark-skinned nin with shocking white hair before being pulled behind the velvet curtain, "Holy crap, is that who I think it is?" She was met by the redheaded kunoichi on his team, who grinned at the shocked blond and pointed a thumb at herself.

"That's my boy, Omoi," confirmed Karui, "He's alright most of the time. But if he don't treat you right, just come to me. I'll set him straight for ya'." Kauri ginned evilly and began punching one palm to get her point across.

Shiho nodded to please the scary girl, but she began to wonder if volunteering for the auction was a bad idea after all.

…..

Tenten took a deep breath as she waited for Nara to wave her onstage. This was a very big step for her. It was time to let go of the past. For years, she waited for her life-long crush to make a move, but Neji could never move beyond the 'Friends' stage. It got to the point where she was simply worn out from trying to catch his attention.

Having tons of eligible men come to Konoha who knew nothing about plain ol Tenten was the best opportunity to break out of her non-existent dating rut. Normally no one in Konoha would look twice at a brunette with an obsession for her extensive weapon collection. But with this influx of foreigners, it was like starting fresh and getting a second chance to impress guys with her new found sense of femininity.

The host's voice echoed in front of her, "Please welcome a lovely young lady and good friend of mine, Tenten."

'No more boring, tomboy Tenten,' she promised herself while walking into the spotlight and sported a sultry smile for the audience, 'That's right! I am a beautiful ravishing creature worthy of adoration. Eat your heart out, Neji!'

Funnily enough, that was exactly what he was doing. Neji switched between gazing at his glowing teammate in her tight brocade dress and glaring hatefully at his cousin. Neji grated his teeth at how Kou's eyes lit up when the brunette hit the stage and the presumptuous bastard had the audacity to whistle appreciatively at his teammate.

Kankuro was in the process of raising a hand to bid his usual when Kou shouted from afar, "One hundred ryo!"

Rolling his eyes, Kankuro put his hand down and grumbled, "Fuck it." In a depressed funk, he slunk out of the crowd and began grazing though the concession tables again.

Kou waved at Tenten from afar. She squinted from the spotlight in her eyes and had some trouble making out who exactly was the bidder. Wanting to make a good impression, Ten-ten waved back at her admirer.

That was the last push that prompted Neji to put in a bid of his own, "One twenty five."

Kou was momentarily taken aback by his relative's bid. Then he smiled in understanding. Of course, it was a friendly gesture for Tenten's behalf and Kou laughed it off. "One fifty," he countered.

"Two hundred."

Kou blinked in surprise then yelled, "Two fifty." He leaned across the table to murmur privately, "Neji-san, my intentions are honorable. There's no need to be so protective of your teammate."

Neji frowned that the idiot didn't get the message, "Three hundred." Then he muttered back at Kou, "There is need when she is going to be my date."

The smile disappeared from Kou's face, "So, it's like that then?"

"It is," Neji snapped back.

"Three hundred fifty," Kou narrowed his eyes at Neji then waved his own wallet in the air, "This is full and I know your limit. Your payday isn't for another week."

Neji cocked an eyebrow at his cousin, "That may be, but I have resources. Four hundred!"

Realizing Neji's plan, Kou gaped in shock and exclaimed, "You wouldn't dare use Hiashi-sama's money! That was meant to protect Hinata-sama, not for your personal use. Four hundred fifty."

Without taking his eyes off Kou, Neji raised his sign in response and countered, "Five hundred."

"You bastard," whined Kou and gazed back to the stage where his crush waited, oblivious to the rivalry she started. He could bid it up another fifty ryo, but he knew Neji's limit was higher. All he could do was watch his chance at Tenten slip away.

Shikamaru noted Kou's hesitance and began the countdown, "Going once, twice. Sold!"

As the audience clapped, Tenten smiled and waved excitedly to the crowd. She met the other girls behind the stage and gushed, "I have no idea who bought me, but five hundred certainly isn't a kick in the pants. I'll have to thank the guy properly when I meet him. Whoever he is."

At the tables, one Hyuuga man crossed his arms in triumph as the other sunk into a deep depression.

…..

While Tenten's auction was underway, Mitarashi Anko stood on the other side of the velvet curtain, ready to conquer another set of hearts. She rolled her head from side to side then stretched her arms to limber up. She grinned at Kurenai and Shizune, "Finally, it'll be my turn. Thank kami for tonight. It's saving me the trouble of chasing after guys for once. I know some men appreciate a woman making the first move, but trust me, it gets old after a while."

"Just try to tone it down a bit, Anko and no gymnastics in that dress," advised Kurenai as she tried to ignore Anko's racy leather strips that was supposed to pass for clothing, "I'm sure the last thing we need is a public nip slip."

The snake kunoichi bent backwards at the waist then forward again. "Yeah, no point in giving them the milk before they bought the cow."

"Might be a little late on that," muttered Shizune while perusing her clipboard, "We're still in Konoha which means you've sampled most of those men out there already."

Anko paused in her stretching. She thought about what Shizune said then peered through an opening in the curtains to confirm. Her eyes went wide as she gasped, "Holy crap! You're right."

Kurenai helped guide a giddy Tenten backstage then whispered to her friend, "Shikamaru is waiting for you onstage, Anko-chan. There's nothing you can do about it now."

As the host motioned for her to get a move on, Anko sneered haughtily at her friends, "That is where you're wrong."

Anko boldy walked past the spotlight, which hurried to catch up with the kunoichi. She snatched the microphone from Shikamaru just like Ino did earlier and announced, "I need to have a word with the men, if you don't mind. Could you turn off the spotlight please? I need to look around." He should have stopped her, instead Shika held up his hands and was only too content to let the woman dig her own grave.

She smiled at the whistles and shouts thrown her way before announcing, "Thank you, you're too kind. Before we get started, I happen to recognize several faces in the crowd. Yeah, Hi to you too, sweetheart. It's nice to see you again but I'd rather you and any others I've dated not bother bidding. We already got down 'n dirty and I wanna start something new." There was a loud rumble of grumbles through the crowd.

Then Anko did the unthinkable, "So this is how it's gonna work. If I remember you, you can't bid." She began picking out her former paramours, "Yup, I remember you from last year, so... No, you can't bid. And no, you can't bid either. Haven't seen you around before so, yes. Dude with sunglasses next to him?" She squinted to get a better look, "No, already hit that, so you can't bid."

Kiba growled to Shino, "I thought we were the ones who could pick and choose."

"No, no, no, no, Yes. No, yes, no, no-Yes." Anko's finger bounced from one irritated man after another, "No, yes, no, too ugly- wait a minute!" Anko squinted to get a better look at Shee, who had beads of sweat rolling from his forehead, "Oh alright, I know we already had a go, but since it was a quickie, I wouldn't mind another round. Just to see if you can make it past three minutes."

The Raikage glared at the nervous jounin standing by his side, "Shee."

"Yes, sir," The Kumo shinobi with shaggy blond hair bowed his head, "I made sure to protection, sir, but I'll go to the hospital in the morning and get tested anyways."

Tsunade whispered angrily from the shadows, "Nara, stop her!"

Shikamaru followed orders right away. He grabbed the microphone from the snake kunoichi and turned back to the crowd, "And we will start the bidding at one ryo. Do I hear one?" There was a tense silence with a lone cricket chirping in the background. Then the audience as a whole looked over their shoulders to see Kankuro absentmindedly raise his hand while he slipped a plate full of finger sandwiches under Crow's cloak. He hadn't even bothered turning around to see who he was bidding on.

Knowing exactly where this auction was headed, Shikamaru quickly spat out, "Yosh! One ryo going once, twice, sold! On to the next lady."

"Say what? Hey," yelled Anko as she walked out of the spotlight and grabbed the host by his lapels, "Are telling me that's it?"

Hearing the end of the auction through the loud speakers, Kankuro left the food table and walked to his brother's side. He wiped the crumbs from the side of his mouth with one arm and asked, "Oi, what happened?"

"You won a woman," muttered Gaara and gestured to the stage, "Congratulations, may you two live happily ever after. I'm one of the beneficiaries on your life insurance policy, right?"

"Hot damn, I won and all I had to shell out was one ryo! Who is it?" Kankuro's excited grin dropped when he got a good look at an angry Anko shielding the lights in her eyes and peering into the darkness for the one who dared to bid so low, "Aw man, I bought the psycho? Can I trade her in?"

Anko grabbed the microphone and stuck a finger at the audience, "Whoever you are, you're gonna pay for that!"

Kankuro cupped a hand to his mouth and shouted back, "Whaddya mean, I already am!"

Shikamaru wrestled the mic from Anko's hands then reminded the audience, "Once again as a reminder all auctions are final. Please leave the stage so we may continue."

"Little bastard!" Anko kicked Shikamaru's shin which made the crowd burst into laughter as he hopped and hissed in pain. Then she stormed off the stage.

As the host rubbed his ankle, Tsunade waved at him from the sidelines, "Nara, we're skipping Kurenai and Ayume for now." The Hokage pointed to the girl Shizune was dragging to the head of the line, "Sakura's auction will have to do damage control."

Shizune gave the surprised Sakura a pity pat on the shoulder, "No pressure."

…..

AN: I've started working on chap 9 at the moment, but I'm being obsessive on keeping the storylines straight. Hopefully, I can get the next chap up in Oct.


	9. Chapter 9

I do not own Naruto nor make any profit from it

AN: Not to worry, I am Telgar. Yoshino, Tsume, and the other Konoha Moms will show up soon enough.

Chapter Nine

Mabui of Kumokagure watched her target as she hovered between the hotel lobby and the garden. The Hyuuga clansman sat alone at a small table for two in a dark corner. There weren't many Hyuuga nin among the bidders and of those, only two were close to what the Raikage needed. It was a shame that Hiashi's nephew had won the girl named Tenten. As far as the Raikage was concerned, the closer to the Hyuuga leader the better, but from Mabui's perspective the nephew he was far from ideal. The other Hyuuga was a different matter.

'Kou was it? That's right. Neji-san called him 'Kou.' Mabui was glad she put extra effort into gathering intel. She spent the better part of an hour perusing dressing rooms and walking through garden to pick up the latest gossip. It was easy to find the two Hyuuga men sitting together. Tension ran dangerously high during the auction for the young kunoichi and came to a head when Neji won.

That was when she set her sights on Kou. He was perfect. He had the bloodline. He was the right age, not too young, not too old. Hell, he was even cute, albeit in a sad sack sort of way at the moment.

Smirking to herself, Mabui slowly made her way across the room to the man's table, 'If the job gets done right, he'll have a smile on his face and be none the wiser.'

As a cloud of depression hung over his head, Kou stared at a lonely little flower vase that tried it's best to cheer him up. He made a forlorn sigh for the umpteenth time when a voice woke him from his pity party.

"Didn't get the one you wanted?"

He lifted his head up to see a dark-skinned woman with green eyes and gray hair pulled into a bun. His pearl eyes lit up when he recognized her right away as the Raikage's secretary. He sat up properly and shook his head.

"Sorry to hear that," She pulled up a nearby chair and sat next to him, "You can call me Mabui. This seat taken?"

"Kou," he responded, "Feel free to sit."

"Thanks," Leaning an elbow on the table, Mabui looked around the room, "I saw what happened at the auction before last. I'm impressed that you're still here. Bet you have no intention of going home empty handed."

Again, he nodded but rather hesitantly.

Mabui winked at him and waved to get a waiter's attention, "That's the spirit. I've heard it said when one door closes, another one opens. Who knows what the rest of the auction will offer? You might still meet the woman of your dreams."

When the waiter arrived, Mabui picked up a couple beers from the tray and handed Kou one.

"What about you?" He clarified when she quirked an eyebrow at him, "I mean, do you plan on meeting someone here?"

She gave him a tired smile, "I honestly doubt it. I'm on official business to play matchmaker for the Raikage's brother. No, it would be better for me to refrain from indulging."

"I get it. You must have someone waiting at home," concluded Kou and he made the effort to observe her reaction.

For a fraction of a second, Mabui's face mirrored frustration and confusion before she covered it up with a rushed laugh, "If there was someone, then being here would be a lot easier."

He was going to ask what she meant by that when she redirected his attention to the stage.

"Looks like they're done with their break," Mabui took another sip of her drink, "I wonder who will be next. The last one is gonna be a tough act to follow."

….

Hiding behind the red velvet curtain, Sakura shuffled nervously. "Five hundred ryo for Tenten and one for Mitirashi-san." She couldn't help keeping running tab of the other girls' contributions in her head, "Even Shiho pulled in a nice amount. Now it's my turn. Kami, I really hope this doesn't end like Anko's."

"And now I present the Hokage's most prized student," Shikamaru's voice boomed from across the stage and signaled her grand entrance, "Please come out, Haruno Sakura."

Sakura walked from the side, all smiles and glowing like a princess. As she tried to position herself in the spotlight, her geta caught on the edge of her elaborate kimono and she felt the tug on the hem, making Sakura lose her balance. The crowd gasped along with Sakura as Shikamaru quickly rushed to catch her from falling flat on her face.

"Thanks, Shikamaru," she whispered when he pulled her upright. Then Sakura caught a glimpse of Kiba standing next to Shino. Memories of their heated conversation in the dress shop came back with a vengeance. Noting the smirk on his face at that very moment, she straightened her spine and held her head high. She was determined to make that Inuzuka bastard eat his words.

Despite the annoying spotlight in her eyes, Sakura put the bright smile back on her face and the crowd broke into relieved applause, 'Choke on this, Kiba.'

When Shikamaru held the microphone for her to speak, Sakura gracefully replied, "Good evening all, thank you for helping our charities. It is an honor to be with you tonight and I look forward to spending a beautiful romantic evening with the winner," She blew a kiss into the crowd and as she predicted, it brought out a hysterical Lee to the forefront of the stage.

"It's mine, it's mine! Out of my way, that kiss is for me-URGH!" The love-sick fool nearly had one foot on the stage when he was promptly pulled back down by Gai.

Shikamaru searched the room and in his head, he examined the situation like a game board. A heavy feeling of anticipation was everywhere as several suitors readied themselves for a fight and the major players looked around the garden, carefully sizing each other up.

At the forefront, Lee was chomping at the bit, his very fat wallet was at the ready to throw at the host for his beloved Sakura. He was starry-eyed, lost in love, and barely contained by his well-meaning sensei.

To the left side of the garden, a confident Morino Idate stood between his brother, Ibiki, and his wealthy boss, Wasabi Jirocho. Word on the street was that he ran extra errands ever since he heard that Haruno was in the auction. The famous sprinter folded his arms sneered at the competition. Shinobi or not, no one in the room was faster than him. He was a winner!

On the far right, Naruto was in the middle of warming up his limbs, huffing air, and practicing flashing his sign. "Sakura-chan will be mine," he kept chanting out loud. He may have let Hinata slip through his fingers, but he'll be damned if he lost Sakura too.

Then Shikamaru looked the far side of stage, down and a little to the left, stood Kiba digging a pinky inside his ear and looking rather bored. He took the finger out, sniffed the ear wax, then wiped his pinky clean on the side of his black jacket.

Shino sneered in disgust at his teammate's bad habit.

"What," asked Kiba.

'For Sakura's sake let's hope that rumor about Kiba's secret crush is just that... a rumor.' Shikamaru cleared his throat to catch their attention, "Alright then. To keep hostilities from escalating any further, shall we start the bidding," He looked in the direction of the eager taijutsu expert and held out a hand, "Lee?"

"One hundred!"

Kunijirou casually waved his number, "One hundred twenty-five."

"One fifty," yelled Naruto then he glared in the direction of the merchant and his son. The kid broke out into a sweat, tugged on his father's sleeve, and whispered in Kunijirou's ear. The man sighed and shrugged, not moving again for the rest of Sakura's auction.

That was when Idate decided it was time to throw his hat in the ring, "Two hundred."

"Two fifty," countered Lee.

Three hundred," said Idate.

Naruto waved his sign frantically and shouted, "Three fifty."

"Four hundred," intercepted Kiba and that brought out a surprised gasp from the crowd.

Shino peered at his teammate, "What the hell are you doing? You don't have four hundred ryo."

"Course not," snickered Kiba, "I just like fuckin' with them. Don't worry, it'll be exactly like Ino. Someone's bound to outbid me. This way Sakura will start talking to me again."

"Four fifty," yelled Idate.

Kiba thumbed at the other side of the room, "See, I didn't have to do shit."

"Just be careful on your movements from now on, Kiba," reminded Shino, "You are being watched by Nara."

Kiba brushed off Shino's words of warning, "You worry too much."

"Five hundred," Naruto clasped his hands together and prayed it would be enough. He had only fifty ryo left and if Idate-

"Five fifty," The damn sprinter had a nasty grin on his face as he watched Naruto squeeze his eyes shut in frustration. He knew that was at Uzumaki's limit and his rival was officially dead in the water. That left only one opponent.

Realizing he was all that remained, Lee held his head high and announced, "Fear not, Naruto-san. I will not let him lay one hand on our sweet Sakura-san. I will give my one hundred and ten percent." Lee took a deep breath and shouted, "Eight hundred ryo!"

Idate's jaw dropped along with the other bidders, "Wh-what did he say?" He was prepared to go as high as seven hundred, even had a contingency plan of hitting up his brother for another fifty, but EIGHT!

Shikamaru was stunned, but excited that the bidding had gotten so high, "Eight hundred! Do I hear nine?"

Naruto fell into his chair, shell-shocked that he had underestimated Lee's determination, "How the hell did Rock Lee get that kind of dough so fast?"

Lee was beside himself with joy. Naruto was out of the running and that so-called sprinter was now begging on hands and knees from both his older brother and his boss. With all the sacrifices he had made for the past moths, Rock Lee had won his Sakura-chan!

Kiba laughed at the spectacle and shook his head in bewilderment, "Man, that is seriously nuts! I can't believe those bakas would actually pay big money for one date with her." He waved his hand in Sakura's direction which caught Shikamaru's eye.

"Nine hundred ryo! We are at nine hundred! A new high for tonight, folks." Shika wiped his brow in amazement as the whole room broke into applause.

Distressed and shaking, Lee couldn't believe his chance was slipping away. His vision went black. His body began to sway from the stress. It was a good thing Gai was right behind him with arms stretched out to catch his student.

Kiba blinked and looked around him, "Damn, who the hell bid nine hundred?"

Shino slowly turned his head to stare at his teammate. Oblivious to what his actions, Kiba was rubbernecking at people around him, literally searching for the sucker who was about to lose his paycheck. Shino paused to think. He could have said something. In retrospect, he really should have said something... but the prospect of watching roughneck Kiba trying to romance the delicate yet emotionally unstable Sakura was too good to pass up.

In the far side of the garden, Idate pleaded with his boss, "Think of it. If I date the Hokage's prized apprentice, it will be your chance to get in Tsunade-sama's good graces."

Jirocho put down his cup of sake and chuckled at the young man's enthusiasm, "I'm already in her good graces, son."

Idate was on the verge of crying, "Please Jirocho-sama! I will pull double-shifts."

The old man groaned to see his favorite employee beg on hands and knees, "Very well then. I will spot you this time, but no more."

"All this fuss for one night with a girl," sniffed Idate's older brother.

Jirocho chuckled, "We all were young once, Ibiki."

When Idate hopped up from his knees, he waved his sign fervently, "Nine fifty!" He crossed his fingers and hoped beyond hope that whoever was outbidding him had run out of money.

Shino wasn't going to give up that easily. He gave a few of his beetles directions to stir things up. The kikkaichu flew out of the openings behind his ear and up one of Kiba's pants legs. They swirled around in any open space they could find then crawled along his leg hairs, tickling just about every nerve along his skin.

"Shino, what the hell are you doing?" Kiba kicked and twisted like a madman, "Cut it out."

"Sorry Kiba," lied Shino as he commanded the beetles to return, "I don't know what got into them."

Shikamaru announced loudly, "One thousand! We are at one thousand! Is there anyone else who can top it? Anyone?" He searched the faces of all the other suitors.

Lee was in huddled sobbing mess on the floor, inconsolable by Gai. Naruto was no better, except he had Chouji and Kakashi already flagging down a waiter to call a rush order of ramen from Ichiraku's. Idate had his head bowed low in defeat with his older brother reassuring him that there were plenty of other fish in the sea. Kiba, on the other hand, looked relaxed for a guy about to claim one of the most hotly contested females so far that night.

"One thousand going once, twice, sold! Haruno Sakura is now our top bid for tonight." With the whole garden bursting with clapping and wolf whistles, Shikamaru carefully led the flabbergasted Sakura off the stage. She was giggling from so much excitement, the slightest breath of wind would have knocked her over.

He returned though the velvet curtain with a sweep of his arms, "Amazing folks, absolutely amazing. The night is still young and we still have so many more women to go."

"Un-fucking-believable," laughed Kiba as he turned towards Shino, "Someone paid one thousand dollars for Sakura. I better go find the idiot and give him fair warning. You know who he is?"

Light glinted off Shino's sunglasses, "Yes."

"Well point him out already." Kiba's snarky attitude slowly disappeared as Shino brought out his finger and the digit traversed the room, from the Kazekage to Ao of the Mist nin to Darui of Kumo before landing squarely in front of him.

Frowning, Kiba pushed the annoying finger out of his face, "No, seriously man."

"It's you, Kiba. You are the one who bought Haruno Sakura for one thousand ryo."

…..

Loosening his tie, Shikamaru came through the curtains and yelled, "Alright, the crowd is hyped up and ready to spend more money. Who's next?"

Then every living soul froze when they heard a man's cry of anguish and pain from the garden. After a few seconds, it went eerily silent.

Shikamaru looked around at the women around him and shrugged, "Maybe that was Naruto or Lee again. Come on people, get then next girl ready. We only have so much momentum to work with."

Shizune motioned forward her friend, "Ayame, are you ready?"

The waitress came to the head of the line and nodded, "As I'll ever be." For once, Ayame didn't have her chestnut hair hidden behind a kerchief and she wore a delightful yellow sundress, instead of her usual work uniform.

Shikamaru took Ayame by the hand and led her on the stage. They caught a glimpse of a medic team heading for the lobby and carrying a passed out man in a stretcher. The victim looked like Kiba. There certainly was a huge white dog followed behind the medics.

He shrugged it off then lifted the microphone, "A lot of you have briefly met Teuchi's daughter, Ayame. Tell us something about yourself aside from working with your father."

She leaned into the mic to say, "I have been dying for a change from my role as the Ramen Girl. I would like the rest of Konoha to know me as more than just a the girl who serves hot meals with a smile. I traveled outside of Konoha to train and have become an excellent cook with ambition."

"That's nice, Ayame," Shikamaru tried to back off and get the auction started, but she followed the microphone.

"What I really want to do is create the perfect bowl of ramen. I want to carry on my father's dream as my own and make Ichiraku's the best ramen stand the history of ramen."

Shikamaru wanted to be polite, but she wouldn't let go, "Thank you, Ayame-"

She grabbed the mic and continued with fervor, "It will be the best because I will always do my best and I won't let anything or anyone stop me!"

"Very admirable, indeed. Now if we can begin." Shikamaru guided the waitress back to the spotlight and walked to the other side.

Below the stage, Lee gawked at the determined beautiful woman with chestnut tresses and felt like the world shifted underneath his feet. There she was all this time. Everyday, she served him and worked with him. Presenting each bowl of ramen with a bright smile, the woman persevered in her own way to do her best and invest blood, sweat, and tears to live her dream. And it never occurred to him until now, that the lovely Ayame would be a match for him.

"A hundred ryo," yelled Lee, not quite believing what he was doing. The next five minutes felt oddly surreal. Lee's voice and actions were his own and yet, the world around him seemed to melt away as if it was only him and Ayame. There were a few interested men. But once they realized that Rock Lee was serious about the waitress like his precious Sakura, the other bidders politely bowed out. The next thing he knew, Lee heard thunderous applause around him and a happy Ayame was walking off the stage.

Lee had a shit-eating grin on his face when it hit him that he had won a date! Guy gave him congratulatory pats on the shoulder.

"This was not according to my plan," he murmured in amazement then clenched his fist in triumph, "But in my heart, I know it was the right choice. YOSH!"

…..

Hana was about ready to go onstage when a bellhop came handed a note from the front desk. She quickly read through the message then scowled and spat a few choice words about her little brother. She crumpled up the paper and went in search of either the Hokage or Shizune.

She ran into Shizune first and had to explain on the way out the door, "Send in another until I finish checking on Kiba. You know he can be over the top sometimes. I'll be back soon."

"W-wait," started Shizune and she searched her list for anyone ready at that moment then saw herself in the mirror, "Oh."

Three minutes later, Shizune waited on stage and put on her most pleasant smile for the spotlight. She didn't have any real expectations. All she cared about was doing her duty then the heck out of there. When Shikamaru started the bidding at a ten, Shizune didn't mind a bit. It simply meant that her turn would be done all the sooner and without any silly fanfare like Sakura or Anko.

"Fifty," Shizune heard in the distance. She instantly recognized the voice as her former teammate, Raidou. She fought the urge to roll her eyes. Shizune knew all too well that she was nowhere near his type. He was pity bidding. She hated that. No way in hell she was going to put out for a charity dinner date, when he couldn't bother last year when she offered for free. He could go fuck off for all she cared.

"One hundred," came a loud and firm voice from a dark corner of the garden. That one bid set the whole room abuzz.

Shizune frowned and quirked her head to one side. She wasn't sure, but that last bid sounded like, 'A woman? Nah, can't be. Should get my ears checked in the morning.'

"We have one hundred. More?" Shikamaru pointed in the direction of Raidou, who grinned like an idiot and shook his head. Genma stood next to him and had a hard time not laughing. Many in the audience muttered to each other and pointed in the direction of the dark corner of the garden. A flash of light reflected from a camera lens when it pushed out from a bush to focus on the new bidder.

Shikamaru knew there was no delicate way of breaking the news to Shizune. So he went ahead and ended it, "One hundred once, twice, sold! Another first for the Auction. We have our first same sex couple."

Shizune's smile dropped and she turned to gawk at Shikamaru, "What did you say?" Her attention was redirected when a load of catcalls and encouragement rang from the crowd, especially from her former squad, Genma and Raidou.

Genma cupped hands to his mouth, "Hey Shizune-chan, can I get pictures?"

"Now now, people," said Shikamaru as he tried to calm the crowd down, "Jokes aside, we are an equal opportunity charity and I'm sure that Shizune-san will be delighted with her date."

Not to let her former teammates have the last laugh, Shizune waved Shikamaru closer so she could talk into the microphone, "In fact, I would be truly honored. I look forward to meeting you." She bowed gracefully in the direction of the woman's voice. When she walked off the stage, Shizune was met by a smirking Tsunade.

The blond gave Shizune a pat on the back, "Good job pulling yourself together at a moment's notice. But aren't you in the least nervous about dating a woman?"

"Of course not," Shizune brushed off the implication and stayed cool, "It's flattering. Even more, it takes a load off my mind, because I know I'm not gay and once that is explained, I don't have to worry about being harassed into sleeping with her." Shizune felt much better after saying that piece. She very nearly convinced herself.

Knowing her assistant all too well, Tsunade teased Shizune, "But you don't know that for sure, do you?"

Shizune opened and closed her mouth several times to think for some retort, only to come up empty, "Damn it, did you have to ruin it for me!"

….

After Shizune left her auction, Kurenai walked out to meet Shikamaru on stage and bowed to him then the audience. Before she was blinded by the bright lights, Kurenai waved her closed fan at her former student, Shino, but was surprised not to see Kiba or Akamaru beside him. Kurenai was about to ask when Shikamaru distracted her by sticking the microphone in her face.

"Sarutobi-san, would you like to say a few words?"

She nodded and leaned toward the mic, "I am Sarutobi Kurenai. I've been volunteering at the academy for the past couple of years and I know first hand that the funds are sorely needed. I hate that the children have to share equipment that can be shoddy at times. They deserve to study in a warm, dry classroom. I'm not sure if there's anybody out there who wants to spend an evening with me." She opened her fan and hid behind it to cover her blush. "But I hope they would enjoy the date, knowing the money is going to a good cause." She bowed gracefully then let Shikamaru take over.

"Ah sensei," Smiling underneath his hood, Shino who knew very well there were a ton of men who would kill for a date with her. But he and the team made sure to put the word out about Kakashi and his chicken shit ways. Only one man was going to end up with Kurenai and everyone in Konoha was going to make sure of it.

The shadow nin smiled warmly at Kurenai and gave her a gentle pat on the shoulder. Then he lifted the mic, "Just as a side note. To whoever is lucky enough to win this lady, if you harm so much as one hair on her head, I will personally hunt you down, hogtie your legs, and rip the limbs from your sockets one by one. Okay, who will start the bidding?"

On their side of the garden, Naruto chuckled to Sai, "And I thought we were being overprotective."

Chouji rolled his eyes, "Great way to give a good impression, Shikamaru." Then he got the auction started by shouting, "Thirty ryo!"

Raidou added his fifty ryo then was out done by Genma with another ten. Even Izumo and Kotestu threw in a few bids of their own. Several other foreign shinobi made some bids, but a few whispered words in their ears had them smiling then backing off.

Kakashi waited until the bids reached over a hundred before jumping in, "One twenty."

"One thirty," came Naruto's voice from across the table.

Kakashi did a double take at his student then pointed, "Naruto, did you?"

"Bid on Kurenai-sensei? Yes, yes I did." Naruto had a smart-ass grin that made his sensei a little nervous.

"One fifty," Kakashi lowered his sign and turned to Naruto again, "I didn't realize you were into older women."

Naruto made a show of thinking then said, "Nah, that's not it. Two hundred."

"Two-twenty," Kakashi glared one eye back at Naruto, "Then why?"

"I just really like Kurenai-sensei." Naruto spread his arm across the table, "You could say in a sense, we all do." Sai and Chouji smiled in response to Kakashi's inquisitive glance.

Sai lifted his own sign and drove the point home, "Three hundred."

"Three-fifty! You have no intention of winning," Kakashi searched through the room, noting the vast amount of his peers' grins and smirks directed his way, "Do any of you?"

"Sorry, Kakashi," Naruto grinned at his teacher's predicament, "No sense in handing over a wonderful woman like Sarutobi Kurenai without making sure you understand just how precious we all think of her."

Kakashi lowered his head into his hands, "How much is it going to take?"

"Just be ready for the pain," muttered Chouji, who also anticipated a thin wallet for a long long time.

When the last opponent 'bowed out', Kakashi realized he had to shell out a near nine hundred ryo and he reached for his credit card to be swiped by the cashier. But when he saw Kurenai's warm smile in his direction, Kakashi decided that he could live on packaged ramen for a week or two if he got one amazing night with her.

….

Hana returned to the backstage in the middle of Yugao's auction. She noticed the inquisitive glances from the Konoha kunoichi and explained, "Kiba's fine. Not quite a heart-attack, but he had a nasty shock to the system. The idiot will have to come to terms with his crush on Sakura at their date next week. That's all."

"His WHAT? Our WHAT?"

Hana cringed when she heard Sakura's high pitched shrieks, "Crap." The crowd opened up to make space for the pink-haired kunoichi who was on the verge of a nervous breakdown.

Sakura was wild-eyed and flailed her arms about like a windmill, "Is that who bought me? Kiba? Inuzuka Kiba?"

"And what's wrong with that?" Hana put both hands on her hips and glared down at the young kunoichi, "Do you have a problem with my little brother, Haruno?"

Sakura floundered as she tried to find the right words, at the same time not antagonizing the intimidating big sister, "Er, he... ahem... It's just that he can be such a..." The other girls around Sakura filled in the spaces where she couldn't.

"Hornball."

"Jerk."

"Douchebag."

"Bully," Sakura finally said as she wrung her hands nervously, "He has a tendency to be a bully, Hana-san. He is a true friend, but it can be really hard to see him as romantic."

Narrowing her eyes, Hana towered over the young kunoichi in defense of her brother, "On the contrary, Kiba can be a sweet, caring, selfless gentleman when he lets someone in his inner circle. You girls simply haven't given him the chance. All you do is write him off as an asshole without seeing what's underneath his tough exterior. Shame on you. All of you!"

There was a soft mumbling among the girls as they glanced at one another, remorse written all over their faces.

Sakura was the most guilt-ridden of them all and she humbly replied, "My apologies, Hana-san. You're right. Perhaps we judged him too harshly."

Satisfied with the sad looks on the young kunoichi, Hana nodded her acceptance of Sakura's apology then walked for the stage to wait her turn.

Kurenai stepped next to Kiba's big sister and whispered, "Is it true that Kiba is a gentleman underneath?"

Hana frowned deeply as she confessed, "Nope, I'm blowing more smoke out my ass than a plugged up chimney. But we can do it."

"Excuse me?"

"My mom, you and me," Hana pointed to Kurenai then herself, "The three of us are the most influential women in Kiba's life. We can train Kiba on how to woo, romance, and court the shit out all those snobby little bitches back there."

"That was a very elegant way of putting it, Hana." Kurenai shook her head in disbelief and sighed, "I don't know if it's possible. Turning Kiba into suave suitor would be like Anko taking a vow of celibacy."

Hana lifted a finger, "Not impossible."

"But improbable," emphasized Kurenai.

Hana clicked her tongue and crossed her arms, "You're right. He is a toughie. Don't blame you really and I understand that you're not up for the challenge."

Kurenai caught Hana by the arm, "I didn't say that."

"Good." Hana gave Kiba's former sensei a saucy wink before walking into the spotlight.

…..

Tsunade waited impatiently in the wings as Hana went through her auction. The bidding was lively and the blond woman counted the all collected ryo in her head. She always got such a rush when a plan came together perfectly. So far they had covered the expenses of the charity. Now the rest was going to supply the academy and orphanage with the necessities. Tsunade peered through the curtains to get a better look at Director Makino and Takase, his cameraman, hiding among the bushes.

'Yup, they're still there. Getting as much footage as possible,' She rubbed her hands together, 'If the television deal works out, we'll have a nice surplus this year and I'll get a nice bonus too.'

Five minutes later, Hana came off the stage with a proud grin and six hundred more ryo for the academy. The Hokage smiled and gave her favorite vet a nod of acknowledgment.

"Now it's my turn," Tsunade didn't bother waiting for Shikamaru to introduce her. She swept into the spotlight with her red robe billowing behind her and she blew an air kiss at the applauding audience.

"Alright we have the Fifth Hokage. Late on a report? Need to suck up to the big boss? Here is your chance," Shikamaru chuckled at the nasty look Tsunade shot him, "Shall we start the bidding at-"

Mifune interrupted Shika with a loud shout, "Two thousand ryo!" All activity stopped and stared at the esteemed leader of the samurai. Waiters, passing guests, and hotel staff in the lobby stopped whatever they were doing to peer into the garden. They stared at the famous samurai warrior with his wizened eyes and long dark gray hair.

Shikamaru found his voice again and waved his hand to the other bidders, "Any competing bids? Anyone?" He was met with shocked faces and shaking heads, "Damn, that's one way to win. Stupefy the competition straight out the gate. SOLD to Mifune, from the Land of Iron, and a brand new top bid for the night."

Mifune strode onto the stage then handed Shikamaru his entire money clip, "It's all there."

"But Mifune-sama," Shikamaru tried to explain that the Meet and Greet was later, but the man was intent on claiming his prize NOW.

Mifune took the stunned Hokage by the hand. He led her off the stage, through throngs of curious women behind the scenes, and into the hotel lobby.

Noting that a camera man was following them, Tsunade navigated the hotel steps as best she could in her long robe and asked her eager paramour, "Not to seem ungrateful, but where are you taking me, Mifune-sama?"

He smirked which quirked one corner of his mustache, "I understand there is an all night sake stand not too far from here."

"But this is not the official date," Tsunade waved at the civilians staring as the couple walked through the street, "It's next week and there is a restaurant donating our dinner. No need to spend any more of your money, Mifune."

"Money is irrelevant to me, Tsunade. We can enjoy ourselves for the duration of my stay or wait until next week to begin our date? It is your choice entirely." He fixed her with a hard stare while planting a soft kiss on the back of her hand.

She nearly lost her balance but managed to keep a cool head, "Lead on, sir."

….

AN: Yes, Mabui really is up to something and if you hadn't caught the hints in Chap 1 and 4, it will be revealed in the next update.


	10. Chapter 10

I do not own Naruto neither make any profit from it

AN: Had massive scheduling issues, so my fanfic writing had to be put on hold. Thankfully, I was able to find some time these past few days and was able to finish Chap 10. This chapter is mostly for plot movement and there's not much interaction with Kiba and Sakura. However the next update will kick off with Sakura and Kiba's Meet 'n Greet.

Chapter Ten

"Oh, no! Oh no! That wasn't supposed to happen! Tsunade-sama, where did you go?" Shizune was on the verge of losing her mind. Mifune had absconded with the Godaime for kami knows where, leaving the poor frazzled personal assistant to carry on orchestrating the rest of the charity auction. Clutching her clipboard like a treasured teddy bear, Shizune rushed to make sure the whole event didn't fall apart at the seams.

'Why did she have to disappear now? Sure, I was the one doing most of the legwork, but at least she ran interference once in a while.' The brunette ran from room to room, double-checking her list of which village was done and which needed to line up for the stage, "Was that the last girl for Iwa? Anyone left from Iwakagure?"

Kurotsuchi popped her head out from around a corner and waved frantically, "Oi, don't forget about me!" The feisty kunoichi pushed the diamond pin back into the side of her short dark hair to keep the bangs from covering her big brown eyes.

"Damn, sorry Kurotsuchi-san," Shizune pressed one hand on the Iwa princess' back and guided her through the back, "Go, go, go!" She gave the girl one last push onto the stage with Shikamaru.

"Now! That's done. Next up," Shizune lifted up her clipboard, "Is Suna." Shizune looked around until she recognized the group of kunoichi and drove through the other girls. "Sunakagure! I need all of you to be ready and lined up at the stage."

"Hai," responded Matsuri, but a quick glance around for her superior made the girl gasp, "But we don't know where Temari-san is?

Shizune slapped her forehead then shooed the girls, "You line up and buy me time. I'll go find her." It took several inquiries and a couple wrong turns to find where the Kazekage's sister had wandered off to. She was stretched out on the hotel roof of all places, and gazing at the night sky.

Shizune opened the exit door and asked, "Temari-san, are you alright?"

The blond slowly turned her head to look in the direction of Shizune, pushed herself up, and dusted off her dress, "I'm fine. I needed a break from the chaos..." The strained from Temari pause implied that the blond wanted to stay as far away from her ex as possible.

Shizune nodded as she waved for the Suna kunoichi to walk inside, "Understandable, but it's almost your turn and I assure you the whole thing will be over in a flash." By the time they arrived, Matsuri and Mikoshi's auctions were done and Shikamaru was peering into the side for Temari. Shizune waved the go-ahead for him.

"Show no fear," Temari whispered to herself and breathed in deeply. Then she put up her mental shields and took the stage by storm.

…..Five minutes before Temari walked into the spotlight...

"You know," Kankuro mumbled to his little brother, "When we made an agreement a year ago to chase off guys not good enough for our sister, it was obvious she had terrible taste in men, but maybe we should back off this time."

Gaara remained unconvinced, "We had a good reason to eliminate each and every bastard that sniffed around Temari. When a good guy shows up, then Temari can date him."

"Not disagreeing with you there," Kankuro paused as he tried to figure out the best way to tell Gaara it was time to mind their own damn business.

"I sense a 'But' in that awkward silence," grumbled Gaara.

Kankuro nodded in the direction of a few men around them, "There's some people in here who wouldn't be so bad for Temari."

"Not bad, but not good enough," Gaara looked around the room and frowned, "We don't have enough time to gather intel on all of them."

Kankuro swept his arms to the entire garden, "But we personally know most of them."

The redhead held firm in his plan, "Not their entire shinobi backgrounds, psychological exams, political ties, family, ex-girlfriends-

"Okay stop right there!" Kankuro peered at his brother as a bothersome thought hit him, "Is that list of criteria you've been using?"

Gaara blinked once, "I don't see why not?"

The older Sabaku lowered his head and pinched the bridge of his nose in frustration, "A kage thinks like that when setting up teams for a mission. Not a brother picking out the bad apples for his sister. Hell, we're lucky she hasn't caved our heads."

"I want nothing but the best for Temari."

"That so? Then why haven't you set her up with Naruto." They both turned to study the Kyuubi vessel chowing down on his tenth bowl of Ichiraku takeout. He had recovered nicely from losing his two best gals, but now was plotting on who could take their place.

"I may have lost Sakura and Hinata," Naruto handed a waiter more empty bowls before digging into another, "But those Mist twins were cute. Yeah, yeah! I can still win two girls, dattebayo."

"Baka," Kankuro and Gaara muttered at the same time.

Shikamaru's voice caught their attention as he announced the next Suna auction, "And now welcome Sabaku Temari. If you didn't already know, she is the older sister to Garra-sama the Kazekage. So please, watch your back at all times." There were some lighthearted chuckles until the spotlight landed on the Kazekage, who stood with his arms crossed and not a hint of smile on his face. The laughter cut off abruptly and was replaced by nervous coughs.

"Right, shall we begin at fifty," Shikamaru pointed to the first man to wave his sign in the air, "We have fifty. Sixty anyone? Sixty, we have sixty."

Ignoring Kankuro's whispered protests, Gaara walked for the stage and got a clear path to where his sister stood. Then he raised his sign, making sure to catch Shikamaru's attention, "One hundred fifty!"

Snapping her head toward where she heard Gaara's voice, Temari dared to glare at the Kazekage. She put a fake smile on her face and tried to laugh off the awkward situation. Then she sidled to where her stupid redheaded brother stood, and knelt one knee on the stage, "Gaara-kun, what are you doing?"

He tilted his head as if it was damn obvious, "Bidding."

"I realize that," hissed Temari through clenched teeth, "Why are you bidding?"

"Nothing wrong in wanting a quiet civilized dinner with my sister."

"Oh ho," Temari clenched her hands into tight fists and Gaara could faintly hear her knuckles crack, "So that's how you wanna play it?" She returned to the center stage, shielded her eyes with one hand and peered into the audience. Temari was able to make out the figures of several interested men. She put on her best smile, rounded on one hip to show off her shapely curves, and gave the audience a flirty wave.

"Three hundred," yelled Nejiri. He waved back at Temari.

She recognized him right away and winked. He harbored a big crush on her since their genin exam, but he never made a move until now. 'Let's hope he brought enough money,' she prayed.

Gaara turned his attention to his fellow countryman and narrowed his teal eyes at the challenger. A quiet stream of sand dropped from the giant gourd on his back. The sand bobbed and weaved through the sea of legs until finding it's target.

Nejiri noticed a strange gritty texture crawling along his calves. He looked down to see a pile of sand rising to the knees and recognized his kage's jutsu, "Ah shit." At the same time another brave bidder felt the same pressure and found Gaara's sand climbing up his legs. There was another gasp of horror. The Kazekage's message spread through the garden at the speed of light.

Shikamaru noticed the sudden lack of other bidders. He also found many of them had frightened expressions and refused to move their signs in any way. After a while, they were down to a couple bidders and Shikamaru was left scratching his head at the men's change of heart.

Gaara looked over the other side of the stage to find the last two. It was the two chuunin examiners, Izumo and Kotetsu who were bidding on his sister. Feeling ominous chakra directed their way, they peered around the stage to see him glaring hatefully at them. Then the redhead drew his thumb across his own throat. The two men paled at Gaara's obvious threat.

"He's just kidding around," Temari said, distracting and hopefully encouraging her two last suitors, "He won't really hurt you." She smiled brighter and winked in Kotestu's direction. She motioned her hand upwards, hinting that they should bid higher. The two men glanced at each other then shrugged.

"Calling his bluff then," said Izumo and lifted his sign, "Four hundred." Like a blind snake coiling it's body together before striking, Gaara's sand bundled behind the two chuunin then flooded into Izumo's feet.

The chuunin felt the sand then dared to look down, "What-"

"The fuck," Feeling the worst kind of deja vu, Kotetsu took a step backward right into the second sandtrap, "Oh shit, not again."

A confident Gaara crossed his arms and commanded the sand to finish the job, "Four hundred and twenty."

The crowd witnessing the 'elimination' of the two chuunin were not sure what to do. It was Kazekage for kami sake. How do you tell a possibly insane, former jinchurriki that he shouldn't be so overprotective of his beloved sister. In the end, Gaara ended the debate by pulling Izumo below the stage and wrapping him in a sand burial.

The last one left was Kotetsu, who watched in horror as his teammate was swallowed entirely from view.

Temari caught Kotetsu's wide dark eyes and gestured at him, trying to get him to bid again.

With fear written all over his face and more sand increasing it's pace up his waist, Kotetsu shook his head like a rattle and pulled the bidding sign behind his back.

Shikamaru scratched his head. He couldn't understand why the interested in Temari dried up, but there was no one else bidding. He frowned then pointed to Gaara, "Four hundred and twenty ryo is the final bid... Once, twice, and SOLD to the honorable Kazekage."

"Son of a bitch," spat Temari. She was about to jump off the stage and give Gaara what for, but found her feet remaining firmly to the floor. She looked below to see the shadows of her heels merging with the two separate shadows from the dais.

"Sorry Temari, but we can't have you attacking a kage, even if he is your little brother," Shikamaru knew better than to touch an angry Temari, but for the sake of civility, he directed the fuming kunoichi behind the red curtains and backstage.

At Kakashi's table, Sai quirked his head to one side and asked in a rather loud voice, "Did the Kazekage really pay a lot of money to date his big sister?"

Chouji lifted his drink and smirked, "Hey, when you're close, you're close." There was a collective hum from the entire table.

…..

After paying the charity cashier for Shizune, Mabui sat on her bar stool and nursed a daiquiri inside the hotel bar. Most of the customers that night were there for the charity auction. The occasional barfly would try to start a conversation with her, but she shut them down quickly. She was there for business, not pleasure.

While most of the Kumo nin were participating in the auction, Mabui was hard at work behind the scenes. If Samui was to be successful in her mission, the right man had to win and that man was Kou who inside his dark corner wallowing in self-pity. He was in no mental condition to try bidding on Samui. That meant many other admirers had to be eliminated by her. A few were nothing to worry about, at least not anymore. One had a nasty 'accident' in a stairwell and knocking himself unconscious. The next had a 'family emergency' call from the front desk. Another shinobi, named Nejiri from Suna, found extra money slipped into his pocket and a suggestion to buy both the green-haired twins and the last one got a touch of food poisoning in his fruit punch.

However, the last two men were not going to be so easy. She had to keep a careful eye on them because they posed real problems. Shiranui Genma was not shy about his infatuation with Samui and Mabui wasn't sure about Raidou's intentions as well. Both were jounin, part of the Hokage's personal guard, and usually on the same squad. Simple mind tricks and strategically placed pats of butter would not work on these guys. Drumming nails on the table, Mabui gave herself a headache, trying to figure a plan to get those two out of the running. Then fortune smiled on her.

Genma and Raidou came strolling into the bar again for more drinks. This time they dragged her fellow countrymen, Darui and Shee, with them. Both Kumo nin gave her a nod of acknowledgment which she returned in kind. The four men gave the bartender their orders and traded jokes about each other's kages.

When Shee tried to pay for his drink, Genma interjected, "Don't bother Shee. I got ya' both covered." Genma nodded to Darui as well.

The blond Kumo shinobi frowned, "You sure?"

"Hell yeah, I'm feeling generous tonight," Genma took the receipt from Dauri and signed it, "Put those on my tab, Matsu. I'll be back in a few minutes."

"Sure thing, Genma-san."

Mabui redirected her attention when he looked up to hand the receipt to the bartender.

He saw the woman's movement from the corner of his eye, smirked and shifted towards her, "Heeey, aren't you the one who bought Shizune? Mabui wasn't it?" He looked at Darui and Shee for confirmation to which they nodded.

Annoyed at being ratted out by her own, she replied, "That's me."

"I'm Shiranui Genma. You are gonna need some help. I've known Shizune for forever," He waved Raidou over then brazenly took Mabui by the arm, "To be honest, you couldn't have bought a better woman to date. But it won't be a cakewalk. You're gonna have to really work on her. "

Raidou joined them and added, "Yeah, she'll be in denial the whole time so tank her up on some plum wine then she'll loosen nice and easy for you."

"And go with a low cut dress," Genma leered at Mabui's full cleavage underneath the mesh inset of her suit, "She gets fixated on tits like you wouldn't believe." He gave the Kumo woman a light pat on the rump and winked, "For luck."

"Thanks for the tips," Mabui gave them a pleasant smile and waited in the lobby until the four men left for the garden. With a mischievous twinkle in her green eyes, she turned on her heels and stalked for the bar, "Makes this all the easier for me to do." She pulled out a pen and smoothly scribbled Genma's name on her receipt.

"Excuse me, sir. I would like two bottles of your finest, most expensive sake. Shiranui Genma was generous to have that and mine put on his tab." She handed him the receipt with Shiranui's forged signature.

Noting that the woman was canoodling with Genma only a few seconds ago, Matsu picked up the receipt and bowed happily, "Of course."

…..

Between two Ame auctions, Sai had come back from his latest round of calling in debts and was now counting the bills that were in his pack.

"So then Sai," Naruto looked over at his teammate, "Have you decided who you want to buy?"

The artist reached into his supply pack and pulled out several rolled up wads of cash, "Yes."

Kakashi, Naruto, and Chouji gaped at the huge amount of money and watched flabbergasted as Sai began tallying up his harvested funds.

Kakashi was the first to break the spell, "Well?"

Sai licked a finger and laid out another pile of ryo, "Well what?"

"Which one do you want," Naruto rolled his eyes in frustration.

"Terumii Mei."

"Ah okay then, you're getting Mei." It took a second before Naruto choked on his noodles, "THE MIZUKAGE!"

Chouji jaw dropped as well, "Dude, you do realize most of these guys are here just for a crack at that hot piece of Mist ass."

"Yes."

Kakashi chuckled at the sheer simplistic nature of audacity and naivete that was Sai, "The man has balls."

Sai barely looked up from his counting to glance at Naruto, "While others have no dick."

Naruto raised his middle finger and was going to threaten Sai with a rasengan shove up the back-end when the lights dimmed for the next set of auctions.

"Better get ready," warned Chouji, "I heard two of the kages are interested in Mei already."

Shikamaru flourished a hand to the other side of the stage, "And now for Mist, we have the gorgeous and deadly Terumii Mei, the Mizukage."

Moving with a grand allure to her strut, Mei came on stage to a roar of applause and whistles. She chuckled at the audience and waved back in appreciation. Then she nodded to Shikamaru to go ahead and start the auction. The bidding started at a hundred but it became heated and fast as many men dropped out of the running like flies. Pretty soon there were only three men duking it out for a chance at Mei... Onoki the Tsuchikage, Ei the Raikage, and Ao the Mist jounin with a serious death wish... er, crush on the Mizukage.

Meanwhile at their table, Sai ignored the rapid fire bidding and concentrated on organizing his money.

"Uh Sai," Naruto couldn't believe Sai was letting the auction pass by without making one bid. He watched his teammate pull out another fat stack and ventured, "That's a lot of cash you carrying. After this auction would you spare some for a good friend?"

Sai kept sorting his money, "No."

Shikamaru's voice echoed through the garden, "Two thousand ryo. Latest bid at Two thousand. Do I hear Twenty five hundred?"

Chouji glanced at the stage, "If you're serious about the Mizukage, you better put in a bid soon before it's too late."

Ignoring the friendly advice, Sai licked a finger and separated a couple bills, then continued counting the money.

Ei lifted his sign once more with, "Three thousand!" He grinned in Onoik and Ao's direction as the little old man gnashed his teeth and the Mist nin slammed a fist onto his table.

"We are at three thousand," reminded Shikamaru, "Three thousand going once, going twice,-"

"And he's lost her," said Naruto as threw his hands up.

That was the moment when Sai hopped upon a spare chair, stuck his sign high and voice "Five thousand ryo!"

Ei and Ao's jaws dropped. Onoki began laughing in his booth while the rest of the garden stared at Sai's unusual yet very precise timing.

Ei turned to his right hand man, "Dauri, give me whatever is left. Is it enough to top five G's?"

Dauri winced, "I'm sorry, boss. We don't got it."

"WHAT!"

"Remember, Mabui came by earlier and needed some extra cash for her," Dauri glanced around in case any not from Cloud was listening in then whispered, "Expenses."

Ei slapped his good hand over his eyes then drew the palm down along his face, "This trip better be worth the humiliation."

Shikamaru pointed in Sai's direction and announced, "Winner, a date with the Mizukage for five thousand ryo!"

"Amazing, Sai," said Naruto as he congratulated his teammate, "I can't believe you actually had five thousand lying there on the table."

"It's not five thousand. Only four, but I know where to get the last thousand."

Sai went to the lobby and found the very last marker that managed to elude him until now. He walked up behind the medic and asked, "May I have a moment with my friend?" The medic shrugged and gave Sai some space.

Kiba felt several gentle slaps on one side of his face then one major sting that broke him from his 'coma'. "Damn," he growled as the world slowly went in and out of focus, "What happened?"

"You fainted," explained Sai as he pulled a glove back on his hand.

Kiba had the hardest time making out who it was that sat next to him, "Sai? Is that you?"

"Kiba, I need the money you owe me. Now."

Kiba shook his head, "I owe you? Since when?"

"Since last year when you borrowed a thousand ryo after the mission in Ame. Remember, you wanted to visit the hostess club that Jiraiya-sama recommended in his reports." He held out his hand, cocked his head to one side, as if he was asking for the simplest favor in the world.

The shock of it all hit Kiba at once. His eyes rolled upwards into his head and he landed back in the stretcher, out cold.

Sai dropped his hand then was pushed aside by the worried medic, "Perhaps I should have asked when he was a good mood."

…..

Mabui returned to the garden, carrying a tray with two sake bottles and a couple cups. She searched the garden and found the one man who needed her help.

"Here have a drink. You look like you could use one." Mabui placed a cup in front of him and sat across from him.

She opened the sake then poured it into his cup, "I see you haven't had much luck getting a replacement." Of course, Mabui made sure of that as well. She burned through most of her cash and had to hit an ATM. Mabui made a mental note to remind the Raikage to sign for the receipts.

Kou winced and slumped further down his chair, "I couldn't see myself with most of the women."

"Bullshit," She leaned a elbow on the table and looked him in the eye, "You lost your nerve. Didn't you?"

He grimaced under her scolding gaze, "Maybe."

She waved a finger at him, "This time, I want to see you try and I mean, really try."

Shikamaru introduced the next woman and it was her fellow countrywoman, Samui. A ear-shattering wolf whistle erupted from the crowd right below the stage. All eyes focused on the man desperately trying to get a hold of Samui's attention.

"Loud whistles don't count, Shiranui-san," teased Shikamaru, "Shall we begin the bidding at fifty then?" The bidding moved in small increments but they were fast.

Mabui picked up her sake and grumbled, "How pathetic, some guys have no self-control. I'm glad I sat out this auction. I'd hate to be the gal spending a couple hours with that jackass. On the other hand, my colleague Samui, will probably end up with someone like him."

Kou nodded in Genma's direction, "He's not that bad really. He may have had a few too many, but Shiranui is a pretty good guy."

Mabui rolled her green eyes skyward, "If that's true, then he certainly isn't acting like it now. You know, Samui could do with a nice guy like you. Why not bid on her?"

"She's out of my league," he grumbled.

She chuckled at his stubbornness, "Yeah, so what."

Kou picked up his sake for another sip, "Thanks for the vote of confidence."

"Don't tell me that you would let something like that get in the way of even trying?" Mabui laughed and pointed to her countrywoman on stage, "Kami, just look at her. Hour-glass curves, cleavage that rivals the Hokage and the Mizukage, and a personality that's cool to the max. She makes boy-crazy girls question their orientation all the time. Only a fool would wait in the wings for a girl that hot to fall into his lap."

Kou squirmed in his seat and felt his cheeks heat up as Mabui described Samui in such detail. He pulled on his shirt collar and wondered if he should be having such a risque conversation with a woman.

"Oh I've heard her say she doesn't care who she dates or that guys are the same everywhere," Mabui noticed the wince on Kou's face and gave his hand a pat, "But I know that's not true. It would be nice for her to enjoy the attention of a polite gentleman for once. The kind of guy who could show her that chivalry still exists... if only for one evening."

"Four hundred," Genma raised his drink in salute to his rival across the floor, who sighed and sat down. One down, three to go.

"Damn," Mabui took a sip of her drink, "Looks like Shiranui has my friend all sown up. Excuse me, I can't bear to watch." She pushed her seat back then headed for the hotel lobby.

Kou watched the blond kunoichi standing on the dais and he had to admit, the Raikage's secretary was on to something. Samui was not enjoying herself at all. The woman's stance was haughty. Her head held high. But her eyes were dead. She expected to attract all the jackasses around her because those were the only men with the guts to try. Meanwhile all the nice guys hung back... just like him.

Kou wasn't sure if it was the alcohol or his own frustration, but he knew what he had to do. He had let Tenten slip out of his hands because Hyuuga Kou was too nice and didn't expect Neji to be such a cutthroat.

By the time Mabui made it back, Kou had joined the fray and threw another bid, "Five hundred!"

A small smile curled on Mabui's lips as she sat down and raised her cup in salute, "Good for you, Hyuuga-san and here's an extra three hundred ryo. Just be sure to show my girl a good time."

…..

Shiranui rubbed his hands together greedily. He was about to raise his hand and trump that sissy-boy Kou when an troublesome waiter came up from behind him and whispered in the jounin's ear. Genma frowned then followed the waiter to the hotel bar. As he passed the table where Kou and Mabui sat, Genma missed the satisfied smirk on the woman's face.

He walked up to his good buddy Matsu and asked, "Sorry, I got caught up in the action. I'll handle the bill right now." Genma balked when he saw the final number at the end of a long list, "What's this?"

"Your bill, Genma-san."

"No, I don't think so," Genma handed the long slip of paper back, "It's too damn much. I ain't paying that."

"Oh dear," Matsu nervously licked his lips and his hand reached under the bar for the panic button, "I am sorry, Shiranui-san. That is your bill. I have all the receipts stapled to it and they all have your signature. I don't want to, but if I have to, I will call the ANBU."

Genma scowled as he dug the money out of his wallet, "This is bullshit." By the time he returned to the garden, a large amount of his money was gone and he heard Shikamaru repeat the latest bid by the Hyuuga.

"Eight-fifty", Genma realized that Kou had raised the bids too high. "Aw fuck," He grabbed his teammate by the shirt, "Quick, give me some money, Raidou! I'm about to lose her."

The other jounin pulled his pockets inside out, only to come up with lint, "Sorry, man. I don't have enough. I spent too much for my date."

"Eight hundred fifty going once, going twice, SOLD!"

On stage, Samui didn't bother blinking when a distraught Genma in the distance fell to his knees.

"NOOOOO!"

Shikamaru lowered his microphone and mumbled aloud, "Dude, it's just a date."

…...

Naruto was in an utter panic, "This can't be right. At the start of this thing, I had two girls lined up. Lost 'em, tried to get others, lost them too. Now I'm the one left hanging. How is this happening to me?"

"Well," began Sai as he counted down on his fingers, "Your first mistake was not choosing one girl. Then you underestimated their value to your competition therefore did not bring enough money to secure your interests. And third, you were too busy stuffing your face with ramen instead of hitting the bank for more money."

"I didn't ask for a play by play," grumbled Naruto.

"Right, you wanted the short version," Sai boiled it down, "You were an idiot."

Shikamaru's voice rang out once more, "And for our last auction for tonight, we have a talented and spunky kunoichi from Kumokagure."

Naruto perked up, "My last chance to grab a girl. I'm going to give this all I got, right away. It worked for Mifune. It worked for Sai. I'll be damned if I'm the only one in the gang without a date."

With a push of chakra to his feet, Naruto jumped from the table and landed on the stage, "Six hundred!"

Shikamaru paused in shock then quickly covered the mic with one hand, "But Naruto-"

Naruto pointed to the floor, "I made a bid. You better damn well honor it. Anyone else want to take me on?" Naruto looked at the crowd and cupped a hand to ear, "No one, huh?"

"But Naruto," Shikamaru tried to get his friend to listen, "You didn't let me finish introducing her."

Naruto puffed his chest with pride, "I said six hundred, didn't I? Whoever she is, I want her!"

"You sure?" Shikamaru searched the room for any challengers, "Any one else interested?" No one stepped up to the plate. The rest were content with their dates or lack thereof. So Nara shrugged and announced, "Six hundred it is. She's all yours." Shikamaru peered behind the curtains and called for the last girl to come onstage, "Hurry on up. Someone's already bought you sight unseen for six hundred ryo."

"Hot damn! Six hundred and I didn't even get on stage. Who is he?" Kauri peered behind a shell-shocked Naruto then knocked him to one side, "Move over, blondie! You're blocking the view. Okay now, where is he?"

Shikamaru pulled his good buddy back into her sights then flourished a hand along side Naruto, "He is your date."

Naruto stared at the Kumo kunoichi with his baby blues growing wider as Kauri's own yellow-gold eyes flashed angrily.

"YOU?!" They shouted and stuck fingers in each others' faces.

"Screw that! No way am I going on a date with her," yelled Naruto as he shook a threatening fist at Karuri, "I'm taking my money back!"

Kauri put one hand on her hip and shouted in his face, "Hell, you can have it back... straight up your lily-ass!"

"What did you call me," Naruto stood nose to nose with Kauri.

"You deaf too, baka?"

Shikamaru laid hands on their shoulders and pried them apart, "I'm sorry, folks. Again! Unless you wanna take it up with the ANBU, all auctions are final. But I suggest you learn to play nice," He lifted the microphone and looked out to the crowd, "We will now have the official Meet and Greet so the couples can get to know each other before the big night. Of course what you do between tonight and then is entirely up to you. The Date Night will be in exactly one week at The Butterfly Lounge, courtesy of the Akimichi Clan. The cashier will give you the necessary information after your payment. Thank you for participating in our charity fundraiser. Enjoy the rest of your night and heh... good luck!"

In a fit of fury, Karui stamped a foot on floor then rushed off the stage, cursing and shouting for people to get out of her way. Naruto waved his arms and roared at the retreating kunoichi then stormed the opposite direction.

Shikamaru wiped the sweat from his brow and sighed with a note of finality, "Damn, what a night!"

…..

Inside the Konoha dressing rooms, several other women watched as Kurenai and Hana attempted to console a furious Anko.

Kurenai laid a hand on her friend's back and tried to figure out the most diplomatic way to explain the situation, "Anko, it's one thing to say that you're a woman with a healthy appetite for sex. It's entirely another-"

"To tell the world you're a walking clap-trap," finished an angry voice from the doorway.

"Whoever said that is in for a world of hurt," Anko stood from her chair and came face to face with Kankuro's big sister, "Oh."

Temari glared at the older woman with an intense frown, "Mitirashi-san, you and I have never been on friendly terms, but I decided it would be polite to give you a proper warning. Should any body parts fall off my brother after his date, I will haul your ass to the wilds then chop off your bits for the wolves to devour. Understand?"

All eyes turned back to Anko who mouth gaped open and looked like she about ready to explode at the indignity of being challenged by a Suna peon kunoichi.

"Remember," Temari used two fingers to point at her wide teal eyes then at Anko before walking out of the dressing room, "I'm watching you."

Anko dropped in her chair and muttered, "I thought Temari-san was the nicest of the Sabaku."

"She is," piped Sakura, "The fact that this room is in one piece is amazing!"

Tenten tilted her head to one side in thought, "Funny though, I never thought of her as the over-protective type."

"Hey," Ino shrugged one shoulder and sneered, "When you're close, you're close." The blond's wiggling eyebrows were accompanied by Tenten's catty meow.

…..

Winding her way backstage, Mabui slipped into the dressing room for the Cloud women and clapped her hands to gather their attention, "Congratulations, ladies, you managed to bring in a substantial sum for the Kumokagure orphans. The Raikage cannot thank you enough for your contribution. Now hurry outside to the garden and see your dates. It's Meet and Greet time!"

Mabui smiled warmly as the excited women hurried in their primping. Then she notice two particular kunoichi who were not celebrating, but fiddling in a corner and trying to fade into the background. Kauri sat on a chair, doubled over her knees with both arms wrapped on her head. Samui had one hand rubbing her teammate's back, doing her best to help Kauri keep cool.

Mabui checked to the room for any outsiders then walked toward the two kunoichi, "Is something the matter? I assumed you would be honored to have a date with Uzumaki. He is, after all, a war hero and sure to be the next Hokage."

"There's more to that, Mabui-san," whispered Samui, "When they first met, Kauri and Naruto didn't get off on the right foot."

Kauri lifted her head and whined, "It was more like a right cross to the nose and anything that happened to be in the vicinity of his stupid fat face. He wouldn't give us any info and I was so pissed about Bee-sensei that I lost it. I beat the crap outta him and he just stood there like a bleeding punching bag. Didn't even defend himself. "

"Ah, no good deed goes unpunished. Is that right, Kauri-chan," Mabui sidled to the other side of the fiery kunoichi, "Funny how life works."

"It's not fair," wailed Kauri, "How come everyone else gets a chance at romance, but I'm stuck with the Sunshine and Rainbows loser whose face I pounded into hamburger?" She hung her head once again.

Mabui laid a hand on the younger's shoulder, "It's only for one date and you don't have to spend any more time than necessary. Consider yourself lucky. It could be much worse."

"I don't see how," Kauri mumbled.

"You will soon enough," Mabui looked around the room and saw that the rest of the ladies had wandered outside, "Kauri, could you do me a favor and keep a look out. I need a moment with Samui."

The redhead wiped that last tear then stood up and put her game face on, "Hai!" She went to the door and left it cracked open to keep guard.

Samui watched her teammate go to the door then turned for her orders, "What do you wished to speak to me about, Mabui-san?"

Mabui turned to the blond with a serious look on her face, "Do you remember the last mission that Kashike-san completed before retiring?"

Samui's gaze turned inward and her shoulders slumped, "Yes." She knew this mission had to boil down to sex at some point.

Mabui noted the lack of emotion from the other woman's face, "The Raikage has set you with the task of bringing the Byakugan lineage to Kumo. If you manage to lure the man from Konoha, then it must be his own decision."

Samui winced at the prospect. It was extremely difficult to convincing a man to leave his country for a woman within the span of one week.

Knowing the odds, Mabui gave Samui a firm nod, "Then you understand what to do. Chances are good that you should have no problem. The doctors gave you a boost of hormones and your cycle fits for the next week. Report to me when you've made progress."

Kauri let Mabui go by as she left the room then the redhead spun around and whispered harshly, "Cycle? Hormones? What is she going on about?"

Samui sat down in front of a mirror and began refreshing her makeup, "I've been given a seduction mission."

Kauri's mouth dropped open. She couldn't believe what she heard, "They want you to get pregnant on the sly? That's crazy! You don't even know if the kid will have the Byakugan."

Samui dusted some perfumed talc along her neck and wrists, "A chance they're willing to take because it's the best method to gain a kekkei genkai without damaging any treaties. There would be very little diplomatic or legal recourse for Konoha to challenge the mother's rights once she's out of the country."

"What about the father's rights?"

Samui didn't say a word, only looked at Kauri though the mirror and raised an eyebrow.

Not liking the situation one bit, Kauri crossed her arms and spat in disgust, "Tch, for our Kage and Country."

….

AN: Phew, sorry it took a while, but Chap 11 is already started. If things go well, it should be posted sometime in Jan. There is a lot to work with, including a sexy tidbit and I want to make sure that's written properly.


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